Partner involvement

Absolutely not. During work hours he isn't on the hook for any childcare unless it's an absolute emergency. But that's not what's happening here.

Once work is finished, you're both parents do everything needs to be shared as much as possible. Breastfeeding obviously makes it a bit more difficult but even then the non-feeding partner can do bathtime, change nappies, give cuddles and get them down to sleep.

You both need time to relax and decompress. If he can't spare any time in the evening, when does he think you're supposed to relax??

my partner is very involved, where he can be. my LO is 5.5 months and he also works 8-4, but leaves the house as early at 5am to go gym.

the way it is for us is i obviously have him during the day and my partner will come home, have some time to himself, and then takes our son so i can relax and cook etc. if my son wakes up super early, like today he woke up at 4:20am until about 5:30am (sleep regression) my partner will just start his day earlier and take him into the living room so i can sleep some more.. on the weekends he split everything so we both feel we had a break.

i think it’s best to try and sit down and talk with him about your expectations and needs. just because women do it alone doesn’t mean you’re meant to do it alone, that’s just ridiculous. he had no problem making the baby with you and needs to at least give you an hour here or there to relax and do your own thing. being a mother is a 24/7 job

My partner works a very physical job out of the house but he’s always helped.

When baby was small he’d hold him 8-midnight give or take so I could get some sleep in and if baby woke before he left for work he’d get up with him. He’d bring him in if he wanted a feed and take him back out when finished.

He’s always cooked and washed up of an evening especially when baby was young and I was feeding constantly.

He’d also take him for an hour when he got in from work so I could have a hot shower or sit and hear myself think.

Your partner absolutely should be doing more x

"Because he says he needs to rest after work and he has to work tomorrow again"

Well what about you??? Do you not need a bit of a rest, and are you not on duty tomorrow again??? It's not like taking care of a baby is being on holiday. Book yourself a hotel and a spa for the weekend and leave him with the baby.

My partner works from home, in the day I try not to use him to help, he will often come down to feed her and play or we go for a walk until going back up but that’s his choice.

When he finish’s work it’s his time to have her so I’ll make dinner whilst he takes care of her, he does this until the last feed and puts her to bed at around 10pm. I do all the night feeds and then he gets up with her around 7/8am for 1/2h before he starts work so I can get another couple hours sleep.

Sometimes we swap depending on moods and tiredness like lastnight I stayed up with her till 10pm, he done the next feed and so on. On weekends we do whatever and split most of it, normally I still do the nights as I really don’t mind them.

Definitely talk to him about this otherwise he will expect you to do it all forever! Being a mum is 24/7 and you need a break, just because some mums do it on their own doesn’t mean you should when you have a perfectly good partner to help.

Good luck you’re doing great 😊

Personally very traditional. I do all the "pink jobs" caring, feeding, bathing, play groups (socialize), park. Middle of the night care / feeding.

My husband works hard out of the home right now so I can stay home with our daughters. It works for us.

I do everything has a unit with the kids.
Naps, baths, eat, play.

If I need a shower I do it with the kids. Toddler plays with bathroom toys and newborn comes into the shower with me. I have a detachable want so I can aim the water.