Feeling Deflated
I have been feeling a little deflated with my mum friend, she is normally great but recently she has made a new friend with a child closer in age, plus I have been pregnant with my second.
I have slowly been feeling more and more like she doesn't want to invite me to things or I will see posts after the fact of her and this other friend going to places that I have expressed interest in going with our children. Also, she invites them to our hangouts, but so far, I haven't been invited to any of theirs, a few times she has done it without asking just tell me she has, plus a few of those where on child free evening, which ended up with my child missing out as he was the only child not there as neither couple made efforts to find babysitters, as well as that she has expressed whilst hanging out that she misses her new friends child but not mine.
It makes me sad not for me but for my son as he loves her son so much and gets excited to see him, but over and over again, he is excluded from things and I just dont want him to have friendships that I had growing up.
I am more just ranting than anything, I just wish that people can tell that words really hurt sometimes
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This really hits home for me. I’ve had a close friend for 9 years and ever since we both became parents, it’s been like she’s found a new group that fits her kid’s age better. I’m often left out without any explanation, even though we used to be really close.
It hurts, and it makes me feel like I’m losing something important. I can’t even fully step back because our husbands work together, so the friendship is kind of stuck in this awkward place.
Reading your post, I feel your pain. it’s exactly what I’ve been going through, and it’s so hard to say how much it affects you when you still care about the person.
Protect yours and your son’s peace. Branch out and meet new mom friends with kids closer to your son’s age. You could ask her pointe blank why she is excluding you and your son, or just let her reach out to you when you’re no longer as available.
This is really sad to read and I’m sorry you feel hurt. I totally get it and women can be so mean to one another. What I will say is know your worth, if they have decided against spending time with you both and involving you, that is their loss. These behaviours are very shallow and not traits of a “good friend”. You don’t need this. Go out and find true friends who value you and want to include you in their plans. You could always politely call her out and let her know how you feel to see if it helps as she may not realise what she is doing or you could just cut your losses and find friendships you deserve.
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