How long before you felt back to normal after leaving your narc?

If you wouldnt mind also saying how long where you with them for in a relationship? This may give better context.

The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.

I left mentally a whole befoer I physically left, but I left him in June of last year it was weird for me at first I was still walking on eggshells around people, apologizing and scared of making mistakes, around December and finally clicks for me that I didn’t have to worry about him so then I started holding my boundaries with him in January this year, and now I still have my ups and downs and sometimes miss the good times, but overall I’m on a way better path than I was mentally it’s still kind of heavy, but I’m really good and way better than it was when I was with him, sit in total almost 10 months for myself, but it’s definitely worth it. I will say I kept trying to find reasons why I should go back or why I needed him, but I had people around me to remind me why I didn’t. a good support system is very important. I would also recommend going cold turkey or going no contact by my situation have kids with him so I really can’t fully cut him off

My ex left me when I was 4 months postpartum w our 3rd, I wanted to end the relationship for a while but never left since I was so vulnerable. Now we are divorcing, but I am struggling a lot still w the mental wreckage he left in my body and mind

in our community

Family culture difference on money

Sorry this is long, I hope some of you get to the end and give advice!!!

So I’m a very thrifty person, things are tight at the moment, the cost of living crisis and my house is heated by oil so things are extortionate. We aren’t on the bread line but we aren’t flush, hubby might be made redundant so there is some financial pressure.

Sometimes I buy my sons something nicer, on the justification that I can sell it on after (♥️ vinted ♥️). I have also been planning on pretty much breaking even most of the baby things I bought from face book market place, side by crib, baby changing unit, etc.

Hubby and I have different money cultures with our families (he’s Indian, I’m British). I’m my family we don’t mix money, we would help each other out if someone was in trouble and will get each other gifts on special occasions. With hubby’s family money is much more fluid, they will give each other things worth thousands of £ just because.

Hubby’s brother bought him a new laptop and a new Google phone, he’s been very generous to hubby. Hubby hasn’t given the same back because brother is much richer.

Hubby and I mostly share finances. If it’s relevant I’m the higher earner.

Now to the point! My babies are so cute they’ve given hubby’s brother (currently single) baby rabies. He’s asked for our baby stuff when we’re done with it. He’s been so generous to hubby I feel really stingy saying no. But I’d never have bought some of the stuff if I wasn’t going to get a return on it - the thought makes me a bit anxious. If we gave all our baby stuff given the second hand value it still wouldn’t equal what the brother had given hubby.

I thought maybe I could give him some stuff but sell some stuff, but hubby said then his brother will just have to go out and buy that stuff, so I should name my price and ask his brother for the money. That makes me feel very uncomfortable, given how generous the brother has been to hubby.

So what do I do ladies? Give it all and suck it up? Give part of it and sell parts on Vinted/FB, or ask hubbys brother for money for it and be uncomfortable? Or do you see another solution?

No one is being entitled or rude here, just a culture difference I need to navigate.

Looking for more same age friends!!

Hi! I’m 23 and a stay at home (soon to be) mom. I have been having a tough time finding friends/women in similar circumstances to mine and would love to make some if possible! If you feel the same, let me know

Advice

Hi everyone! I honestly have 0 social queues when it comes to talking to anyone in general. I definitely have a hard time talking to other women and making new friends. I can 100% relate. I just don’t like the idea of texting or meeting up but when I do I’m like “oh this isn’t bad.” Any advice? I also have a hard time getting comfortable and just feeling judged by other women😅 I’m also 19 so maybe making a change in this now will help in the future making mom friends/friends in general. Thanks in advance!

BJ’s

Am I the only one that thinks blowjobs are boring?

Fiancé won’t talk to baby

Am I being dramatic? Im 23 weeks and my fiancé refuses to talk to the baby. He touches my belly sometimes but that’s the most he’ll do. I brought it up to him saying it’s important for him to have bonding time with baby while baby is developing but he refuses and tells me not to dictate his relationship with his child. Is this a red flag?

Hi Mums

I live in New Zealand and I’m really keen on finding a regular best friend to chat with. It’s incredibly lonely. I love Australia and I think it would be fantastic to have friends there. If you’re comfortable with long-distance friendships we could meet up in New Zealand. I also want someone to video call because I currently have no friends every single day. I feel really lonely because I don’t have a nice family. I just want friends to become family one day and of course I need to trust them first which is why I’m making this post. I just got married 🥹👰❤️