my son’s father and i aren’t together and he is only allowed to see our son for an hour a month (social services are involved, he’s not a good person at all) he also isn’t allowed any unsupervised contact with him until he turns 16.
i don’t receive child maintenance from him and i’m so against him as a person due to his past behaviours and actions that i find it very difficult to communicate with him regarding our son. he messages and calls me constantly but most of it is asking about me- where i am, what i’ve been up to, who i’m with, what my plans are tomorrow etc etc. he doesn’t seem to take much interest in our son.
my social worker has been very clear with me that i am in control and if i don’t want him in the picture that they can make that happen because he isn’t a good person and it truthfully would be easier for my son growing up if he just wasn’t there (he’s 2 months old)
how do i know when to turn around and say i don’t want him involved? because i feel like i’m letting my dislike for him take over
The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.
Learn more about our guidelines.
He's clearly not worried about y'all son so I would personally cut contact. Him asking you about your where abouts and who's around is alarming. Cut phone calls, texts only, ignore questions about you, let him know if it's not about y'all son you won't be responding. If he can't respect those boundaries cut him off.

You need to do what you feel is in the best interest for your son, but don’t forget you matter too. If socials are saying they can make it happen with him being removed from your son’s life I feel that speaks volumes. If you feel he is a threat or will create any issues for your son in any way, then personally if I was you, I would cut the contact. You can still claim CM even if he’s not involved, by law he has to pay. Whatever you decide to do, please do what YOU feel is best, and what YOU want. Don’t let anyone else try dictate and chose for you. As I’ve always said, a child deserves a happy mum over a sad mum X

Honestly take this from someone who had a shit dad & caused alot of pain in my life, no dad is better
Your baby is so little & if hes not a good person he shouldnt be around your baby. Plus it sounds mega confusing hes meeting a person for an hr he barely knows
Its not your actions that have caused his dad to not be in his life