Husband help

You definitely are not being unreasonable. I had significant pain for three months and wish I fought harder for my own recovery. Everyone is so focused on baby it was so hard being ignored and put through so much that early on. Im having a very sacred 4th trimester this time around. As socializing is the last thing I wanted to do with my postpartum hormones.

No, you are not being unreasonable at all. I was in a lot of pain with both of mine for the first couple weeks and definitely wouldn’t have wanted anyone staying or have been going out for a meal. Everyone is different, and some women will have been up and out earlier, but as you don’t know what your recovery will be like I wouldn’t be making plans or committing to anything. Just plan to be at home resting for the first few weeks.

Have him to do some research and read stories on c section recovery. I wasn’t even walking correctly for the first 3 weeks and was still in diapers. You need rest ALOT of it.

Not being unreasonable at all but every recovery is different, I’ve recovered really well both times and gone shopping / out for dinner within a week pp but I know that is very rare! I wouldn’t personally make any plans and just see how you feel in yourself & not push yourself!

I feel men listen to men a bit more in situations like this. He likely has zero clue what a c section entails. I’d find a YouTube or TikTok vid from a dr explaining the procedure & recovery and make him watch it

It is different for each person but what he is suggesting is too much. Me and my husband started leaving the house after 4 days but we didn't see anyone for just over 2 weeks. I was in no state to have visitors at our house or visit anyone. First 3-4 days were tough and mostly spent in or around the bed

We didn't have anyone stay for 6 weeks and even that was too early for me. I would say I started feeling ready to welcome people in my house for stays around 12 weeks as we were still trying to work out what we were doing and were so sleep deprived for the first 8 weeks

You're not being unreasonable at all. It's major surgery, and that's without any complications. I had complications in recovery and I don't think I even managed to leave the house until later than 2 weeks.

You're not being unreasonable, but every recovery is different as well. Don't automatically assume that you will have a long recovery. I went into with no expectations and I was out of the house going to coffee with friends about 1 week post op. I healed very quickly. Movement will actually help you so much! My true advice would honestly be to get out of the house as soon as you feel able. Even just small walks around the block/down the street to start with will help tremendously.

We also personally did not restrict visitors as it definitely helped our mental health to have friends and family around after a traumatic emergency C-section.

Are you able to sit down with your OB and have your OBGYN explain this major abdominal surgery you’re about to have? Even if you feel fine by then it doesn’t mean you should overextend yourself either. This is often why 50% of PP complications after way after birth, not during. He might also change his mind after sitting
With you in surgery but this idea that just bc it’s a way to give birth you should be recovered by then is bogus. Postpartum recovery takes 2 years and that’s not even looking at birth via C-section.

No you aren’t being unreasonable but as others have started recovery can vary from person to person! I had an unplanned csection (slightly emergent) and was out walking by the end of the 1st week, out for dinner around 10 days post op, and had my in-laws staying with us for a week at 14 days post op. None of that felt like to much for me, but every person is different. I would suggest not letting your husband make those decisions as he isn’t the one having the surgery (or with the rush of postpartum hormones). Stay firm with what you want and don’t feel bad.

Not unreasonable. My ex took zero time off after I had an emergency c section after my first and expected me to be able to get back to all household chores + watching the baby after a week. I split my stitches lifting boxes from Costco at 2 weeks post partum

Tell him to lay on the table next to you and let them conduct major abdominal surgery on HIM and then see what he wants to do. 🙄

I went on my first real stroll at the park at 3 weeks post ecs with my firstborn. I would not agree to go to dinner with anyone 1 week post surgery. Having my 2nd cs in 2 weeks, and honestly don’t even want my in-laws coming over as soon as we get home this time… (sure I’ll lose that battle though) it’s an extremely sensitive time recovering. I hope your doctor/ nurses can explain to your husband the recovery process/ timeline so he understands better.