Feeling really disconnected from my husband…
We have a 3 year old son. When our son was a newborn my husband prioritized my MILS feelings (was afraid to be honest with her and hurt her feelings). I was recovering from a C section and she was at our house uninvited when we brought our son home. He knew she was there but didn’t call her and tell her to leave. She knew I didn’t want her there when I brought the baby home.
We invited my MIL to meet the baby in the hospital- she did. The only thing that went wrong was she told us she didn’t like the name we chose for him. Also told me not to feed our baby formula because “it’s poison”. My MIL has always been bossy- controlling, uses a lot of guilt and shame to control things. She’s tried to control how we manage finances, where we live, and now how we raise our son.
Basically since my husband didn’t prioritize my feelings as the new mother - and didn’t put us first- I’ve felt unattracted to him. I view my husband like a he’s man child. He has finally realized how difficult his mother can be. But I just have felt so unsupported by my husband and part of me just wants to get away from him. I want our relationship to work but the connection and attraction seems to have vanished. I have a fantasy of meeting a man that’s mature, emotionally intelligent, that I feel taken care of. Just venting and advice welcomed…
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I have nothing helpful to say, but that all makes sense. I feel you. I get where you are and why you feel that way. And I’m sorry you’re there.
Hey, it’s Megan. First, I just want to say keep being strong and don’t let your mother-in-law walk all over you. When you and your husband took those vows, it was through thick and thin. Right now, it’s getting thin, but you have full control. Don’t let anyone tell you what to do with your baby! You’re Mama Bear, and you protect your little one from any negativity, even your mother-in-law. If you’re feeling unsupported by your husband, maybe you need to lay it all out and be honest. Marriage counseling might really help, it’s often that final step when things are this tough. You’ve got to put your foot down, and don’t worry about hurting feelings. You’re a grown woman, so stand up. And if you do counseling, I’d start going by myself first. Everything will be okay.
All I can say is it’s okay to be a bitch to entitled people 💞 I wouldn’t be attracted to him either. I would be putting her in her place, respectfully and FIRMLY. It’s time to stand up for yourself. Be mad. I’m sorry he failed you in this :(
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