Husband wants to act like a lil bitch

I need some advice or perspective on this.

My husband works a lot okay . But other than working barely contributes mentally or physically or supportive towards the house or me , for context I haven’t had a single break since falling pregnant in 2021 . The only break I get is when my 4 year old is at school but now I’m dealing with a 1year old aswell .

Please help me understand why does this man think it’s okay to go cozy up in bed if he’s not well? I mean you’re sick? So am I ? But that doesn’t excuse me from parenting or doing whatever I have to do to get everything done for the day . Yesterday he was laying in bed scrolling sleeping etc , I lost it because I had to take my 1year old to the GP at 2:30 and he was sleeping? He heard the baby crying but instead of coming down at once this man calls my phone repeatedly 4calls later that’s when he comes down to ask if I need any help I was like wtf so you’re that lazy to even offer help? So when I came back from the GP I didn’t talk or acknowledge him so half hour later he asks me what’s wrong and I told him nothing I’m fine because I know everytime I’ve voiced out how I’m feeling he’s only made me feel worse . I told him give me sometime I’ll be fine but he kept insisting- so I told him I said it’s not fair that you get to go rest while you’re sick but I’m just supposed to continue like I’m not human? I even mentioned I’ve never had a days of rest or a break in 6 years even when I birthed both my children I was back in the kitchen that very day so am I not allowed to be hurt that you get to sleep in and I don’t?he just got angry and walked out .

My point is I tried explaining an telling him it’s not about him resting that he’s sick but it’s about the fact that if I can think that you are human and you need rest why am I not getting the same? Am I asking for too much? Even today he’s been sick and stuck in bed from morning? I’m pregnant with the 3rd which I’m not planning to keep as I know he’s a useless husband who thinks providing money is everything. He wants to be respected but will not respect me , he wants to lead but will mimic everything I do? You want to act like a bitch but expect me to see you as a man? Make it make sense cause oh how I wish I could get away with murder rather than putting up with a useless cunt like this

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Dm me or if you'd like yo video chat thats fine too

I don’t think your asking for too much. I believe he should put in effort just as much as you do every day. You two are a team, not just roommates, and should work together as partners. Helping each other should be the goal, rather than leaving responsibilities to one person while the other defaults. Communication is extremely important, and he needs to learn how to consistently show up and improve his ability to be a reliable team player, actively contributing and supporting one another.

Girllll I know your frustration BUT take a breather for you! Just for you because you reached your maximum capacity with all this.

So sometimes the people we live with or spend the most time with sometimes takes advantage of how we feel etc. Because you've been withholding how you've felt due to his responses he's able to use that to his advantage to possibly gaslight you. Whilst this is your life partner at this time , people can use tactics like keeping you pregnant to keep control of people or the environment.

I don't think your alone in any of this! But I would ask that if you have some time read Pat Caven - living with the the dinominator. Then take one step at a time and come up with a plan to move forward or away from this! All the very best!!!

Wow that’s just crazy I’m sorry I’m here if u need to vent we’re u tryna get pregnant or did it happen

It’s not a lot to ask he should at least try to help out if it’s just to feed the baby while u relax a bit it’s not like ur asking to relax for 9 hours lol but I get it I’m really sorry

Girl just go out , it’s the only way . You might come back to a mess as he sounds useless,but you’re dealing with the mess anyway and you sound like you need space . Go get yourself a coffee and sit in the car and cry 💝

I will never understand why a man thinks this is okay. Yes he works but that’s his kids too. He needs to put in some effort and be a father to them.

No your not asking to much onr of my exs problems too

in our community

I’m angry and disgusted

I didn’t sleep well last night because my daughter is teething and she was up all night. This morning after everyone was up I asked my husband to take the kids so I can get some sleep. My son is potty training he needed to pee he ran to the toilet but didn’t reach in time so he peed on the bathroom floor (this was about an hour after I asked my husband to watch them). I heard my son go to his dad who was watching tv and said daddy I peed on the floor my husband responded “go to your mom tell her to wash and change you”. My son did exactly that I got up and bath him and changed him after that I got ready and went to do grocery thinking that my husband cleaned the pee on the bathroom floor down stairs(we have two bathrooms). When I came back from doing grocery I went into the bathroom and saw the floor was covered with pee. I went to him who was still seating watching tv and asked him why didn’t you clean the pee off the floor he responded ”oh you didn’t do that”

Sick of it

Is anyone else just sick of being the default parent?

I understand my partner works but the weekends he’s home. For context he has had 3 days off this weekend already not once has he got up with our baby (we have 2 children) 4 year age gap.

I do both bed times, wake up with both of them, make sure they’re fed and cleaned while he plays his games to “unwind” while I’m getting wound up.

His mum comes up and acts like I’m the one who should be doing everything and acts offended if I ask her son to do anything. And tonight!!!!! He was awake while our child was waking up crying. He didn’t help he actually waited for my sleep to be disturbed and then just said oh are they ok? Like he wasn’t awake the whole time!!!!!!!! I’m sick of it personally

Venting

Ok i feel really bad but i have no one to vent to. Lately ive been finding myself frustrated with my husband. I feel like he’s not as helpful as he used to be. He works over night so he can stay home with the baby while I’m at work but all he does is sleep and wakes up to feed her when she wakes up and than goes back to sleep. Luckily she sleeps a lot during the day so he is rested. Where as me, i go to work, do laundry, cook, clean, do my homework, fold laundry, put it away, pack his lunch etc. Today i left some used bottles on the sink to wash when i had time, i swore my husband told me he took care of the bottles. I just walked passed the sink and they are just sitting in hot water and soap 😡. Also he has not been so supportive during my panic attacks and anxiety and tells me o just need to put it behind me. I feel like we are disconnected but he says he doesn’t feel that way. I feel so alone. Sorry for the long vent! Thanks for reading.

Fuck my boyfriend right now.

I just need to vent I’m on my fucking period and my boyfriend works and im a sahm mom. He slept all day yesterday because he works 12 hour shifts Monday-Thursday so he slept all day on yesterday and he still fucking sleeping. My thing he fucking knows how bad my periods get I’m in so much fucking pain and having to take care of my son is so fucking hard right now I’ve been in tears for hours. I don’t have normal periods my cramps are almost as bad as when I had Braxton hicks. I love my boyfriend but right now I want to hit him with cast iron skillet.

Constant crying at 5 months

I really can’t tell what it is.
I can see teeth coming in which I think she’s teething, yet teething gel or Calpol doesn’t seems to help as she’s unsettle everytime.

She’s more upset than ever before, boobs seems to be the only thing comforting her yet I can’t keep her on the boob 247 but she’ll happy take it 😂

Just need assistance on how to get through this phase. I feel like she’s going through a growth spurt yet who knows

So, a little mother-in-law drama to add to everything else going on in my life.

After almost 13 years of marriage, my husband decided he wanted a divorce, without giving me a real explanation as to why. One week he was telling me he loved and missed me, and the next he was completely done with our marriage. And somehow, on top of trying to process all of that, I now get to deal with his mother’s opinions.

After raising three kids, being a stay-at-home mom, and supporting my husband throughout his military career, my mother-in-law basically implied that both parents should be working and that my husband shouldn’t lose everything he’s worked for.

What really upset me is that she knows everything I’ve sacrificed for our family. My husband has always compared me to his mom because she worked and raised her kids, but the difference is that she had her in-laws living with them to help. I’ve never had that kind of support system.

It’s frustrating that after everything I’ve contributed to this marriage, somehow his financial contributions are the only ones that seem to matter. Apparently, raising children, maintaining a home, and supporting someone else’s career for nearly 13 years don’t count as work. 🙃

And the cherry on top? I’m not even the one who wanted this divorce, yet somehow I’m being made to feel like I’m the problem.