I need some advice or perspective on this.
My husband works a lot okay . But other than working barely contributes mentally or physically or supportive towards the house or me , for context I haven’t had a single break since falling pregnant in 2021 . The only break I get is when my 4 year old is at school but now I’m dealing with a 1year old aswell .
Please help me understand why does this man think it’s okay to go cozy up in bed if he’s not well? I mean you’re sick? So am I ? But that doesn’t excuse me from parenting or doing whatever I have to do to get everything done for the day . Yesterday he was laying in bed scrolling sleeping etc , I lost it because I had to take my 1year old to the GP at 2:30 and he was sleeping? He heard the baby crying but instead of coming down at once this man calls my phone repeatedly 4calls later that’s when he comes down to ask if I need any help I was like wtf so you’re that lazy to even offer help? So when I came back from the GP I didn’t talk or acknowledge him so half hour later he asks me what’s wrong and I told him nothing I’m fine because I know everytime I’ve voiced out how I’m feeling he’s only made me feel worse . I told him give me sometime I’ll be fine but he kept insisting- so I told him I said it’s not fair that you get to go rest while you’re sick but I’m just supposed to continue like I’m not human? I even mentioned I’ve never had a days of rest or a break in 6 years even when I birthed both my children I was back in the kitchen that very day so am I not allowed to be hurt that you get to sleep in and I don’t?he just got angry and walked out .
My point is I tried explaining an telling him it’s not about him resting that he’s sick but it’s about the fact that if I can think that you are human and you need rest why am I not getting the same? Am I asking for too much? Even today he’s been sick and stuck in bed from morning? I’m pregnant with the 3rd which I’m not planning to keep as I know he’s a useless husband who thinks providing money is everything. He wants to be respected but will not respect me , he wants to lead but will mimic everything I do? You want to act like a bitch but expect me to see you as a man? Make it make sense cause oh how I wish I could get away with murder rather than putting up with a useless cunt like this
The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.
Learn more about our guidelines.
Dm me or if you'd like yo video chat thats fine too

I don’t think your asking for too much. I believe he should put in effort just as much as you do every day. You two are a team, not just roommates, and should work together as partners. Helping each other should be the goal, rather than leaving responsibilities to one person while the other defaults. Communication is extremely important, and he needs to learn how to consistently show up and improve his ability to be a reliable team player, actively contributing and supporting one another.

Girllll I know your frustration BUT take a breather for you! Just for you because you reached your maximum capacity with all this.
So sometimes the people we live with or spend the most time with sometimes takes advantage of how we feel etc. Because you've been withholding how you've felt due to his responses he's able to use that to his advantage to possibly gaslight you. Whilst this is your life partner at this time , people can use tactics like keeping you pregnant to keep control of people or the environment.
I don't think your alone in any of this! But I would ask that if you have some time read Pat Caven - living with the the dinominator. Then take one step at a time and come up with a plan to move forward or away from this! All the very best!!!

Wow that’s just crazy I’m sorry I’m here if u need to vent we’re u tryna get pregnant or did it happen

It’s not a lot to ask he should at least try to help out if it’s just to feed the baby while u relax a bit it’s not like ur asking to relax for 9 hours lol but I get it I’m really sorry

6
46

17

10
1
40
17