How to handle
My SD(6) lives a completely different life than us. Her mom is weird, entitled, and I am not over exaggerating this…has a mental disorder. As my SD had got older I am starting to see her obtain some of there toxicity and habits. I am starting to not like how she is speaking to my bio daughter with her dad (2) . I don’t want her negative tendencies rubbing off on my daughter when she is the complete opposite of her. My daughter is always happy and I don’t want that rubbing off on her. We try our best to make SD as happy as possible when she is with us, but I know that her other household has more of an effect on her. Its tough.
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Ours is 5
It’s a process but first you and dad must be on the same page and enforce house rules together.
My sd gets to do and say whatever she wants at her moms but doesn’t have the same privileges here. So anytime she does or says something she’s not supposed to dad and I both correct her. And if her answer is ever ”I do it moms.” We respond with “this is not moms so you won’t do that here” and if she doesn’t correct herself she loses privileges. Taking Screen time is our best punishment. She cares about the stupid iPad more than anything so we just take it until she decides that she’s going to act and speak correctly. Making her be alone in her room is the next punishment if the iPad thing doesn’t work immediately or if she throws a tantrum. The idea is that if she wants to have nice things and have company then she needs to treat everyone in the house nicely.
We say to her “we want you to be happy and have a good time but you can’t be mean be happy at the same time.”
We really let her have or do anything as long as it stays within the rules of the house. And those rules are for everyone not just her.
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