I need help reshaping my thoughts on my baby potentially sharing a birthday with my mum

My mum and I aren't close, by choice on my part. She's a little unaware and seems to think we're close and she's the best mum ever.

To keep it short, the reality is both my parents were quite abusive and neglectful growing up, now as an adult I struggle to really forgive her. As she's gotten older she's remained quite childish and now I feel like the parent/mature one. She will throw tantrums, cry and guilt trip if things don't go her way, she'll ghost you then act upset a few days/weeks later if you stop trying to reach out. Honestly the whole relationship is exhausting but I try to just keep her happy and keep the peace for the sake of my siblings.

Anyways I'm pregnant wirh our 2nd child and now overdue, however I feel I may give birth in the next day or so! It's really exciting but it's my mums birthday in 2 days and I'm just getting this silly gut feeling that baby will arrive on her birthday.

I just know if it was to happen I'd never hear the end of it, like she'd rub it in in a childish way. I'm trying not to let it bother me because it really doesn't matter but I'd be lying if I said I wish I could choose for baby to be born literally any other day 🥲

I need to just reframe how I think about it tbh, because it's so stupid and doesn't matter. Please help!

in our community

Notning will fucking shut her up!!!

2 nights in a row my daughter isn't even crying it's just noise and it's constant! NOTHING fucking works anymore! I had 2 hours sleep last night and at the moment ive had around 3 hours I feel like I'm in the newborn trenches all over again and I honestly just want to kill my self because I can't be fucking arsed for this shit anymore!

My son was a dream from 2 months old. My daughter is just a completely different child! I can't I just can't do it.

It's fine for her Dad to fuck off downstairs to the couch while I'm just in bed trying to do anything I can to settle her which nothing works!! I don't wanna put her in bed with me because I don't want to get her into the habit of co sleeping, a bottle used to settle her and now it doesn't. Shushing doesn't work, patting her doesn't work.

She's 19 months

I want to die!!!!!!!

Postpartum rage

I need help. My daughter is almost 2 months and I'm currently I'm doing everything by myself cause my bf can't be in the shelter with me. The staff doesn't help at all. I am diagnosed with bipolar and multiple personality disorder. I'm currently struggling to keep my cool with my daughter. But it's hard. I honestly don't know what to. I love my daughter with all my heart but I'm scared of myself cause I don't have my bf here to help me with our daughter. I'm currently sitting in the corner crying

Plz help

Feel like a failure as a mom, it’s only been 5 days

Had my baby via C-section on 9 April. Because she was a C-section baby, she had fluid in her lungs after birth that she couldn’t get out so she was transferred to neonatal unit. I feel like that was my fault because I chose to have an elective section.
Jump forward 5 days. I still have no milk supply despite double pumping like 4x per day. My baby is off the ventilator, but there’s talk of putting her back on because she’s not at a high enough saturation level (92% instead of 94+). She’s also not independently eating because she refuses to wake up and either put my boob in her mouth or take a bottle, so they’re tube-feeding her.
Now, she’s my first. I want to hold her all the time because she’s my first and because I want skin to skin and because skin to skin is supposed to help my milk supply (except right now I just feel like a fucking cow). My husband had skin to skin with her last night when her oxygen was low but when I took her, her oxygen level went right back to where it should be (96-100). So I come in when I’m awake and available and pick her up to hold her for those reasons. Then around meal time, I undress her to try and get her to wake up a bit. All these things make sense right?
Well, the midwife basically told my husband while I was sitting there asleep and attached to the pump that I shouldn’t hold her as much and that skin to skin is important but like, so is keeping her warm. And I’ve checked her temp. She’s hot when I take her blankets off and I put a blanket on when she’s cold and my husband even agreed with me today she was warm.

I just feel awful because I feel like I can’t do anything right. If we were at home, it would be just me and him and everything would be fine. But I’m so scrutinised here. I just feel like such a failure.
Thanks for reading.

Night feeds

I breastfeed my son. He's 2 weeks old and not back at birth weight yet. I wake him to feed in the night and on demand when he wakes. However. Tonight he has not fed much if at all. Just holds on to nipple or sleeps. I can't sleep as worried and keep trying to feed but he won't even attempt to latch.
I've got midwife tomorrow so I assume they will tell me ti formula feed as I'm failing st breastfeeding. I've tried the advice on how to latch and positions just doesn't work

NEED A HACK! 4 month old - holiday help!

We are going to Greece with our three children in 2 weeks for 10 days. We are in one room, the kids are 4, 2 and 4 months. Our baby is an okay sleeper but not great. She sleeps in a next to me at home. We’ve tried to the travel cot here and she hates it as it’s so big in comparison - is there anything that I can take on holiday to make it feel smaller so she might actually sleep?! I can’t find anything when I google or chat gpt the problem so hoping someone might have a hack! Thanks x

Skin yo skin challenges

My baby is 5 weeks old and we have hardly done any skin to skin. We did it at birth, and a few times in the first week. He has problems latching, so I'm feeding him with nipple shields after advice from a lactation consultant. After the first week we have hardly done any skin to skin. If I try, he tries to latch (even if he's not hungry) but he's unsuccessful so he gets super upset. Also, he always gets upset when I undress and dress him, so I end up not doing skin to skin for both reasons. However I now regret that I've lost so much time without doing it. Do you think I can start now? And if so, have you got any tips to overcome those challenges?