Do you have a joint account for bills & shopping?
My husband and i bought our house in 2020 and without a discussion put the mortgage and bills in his name. I wasn't happy but it was done. I have to send him money every month after he tells me how much the bills came up to. Shopping we take turns to pay which isn't fair as one week might be more than others. Also, I do odd shops and buy the essentials for my newborn. This is causing a lot of arguments so my mum intervened and suggested having a joint account to make it fair.
He's now backtracking saying I have to make more effort with him, having date nights and not hide behind my children (ages 3 and 9 weeks). This is what's important to him. Is this fair?
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These are 2 entirely separate issues. Using dates nights in an "argument" about bills and paying for the house makes zero sense. Resolve them both separately.
To answer your question though, we have a joint account for bills and we each have a separate account for spending. $200 gets direct deposited from our paychecks to our personal accounts as an "allowance" and the rest goes to joint for bills and savings
We have a joint account. We both put enough money into it to cover everything (he puts more in than me as he earns more) and everything comes out of that. Bills, mortgage, food shopping. Then we have our own money for ourselves. X
Every family is different tbh, as long as it works for you it's okay. Clearly this isn't working for you so if you want to share everything 50/50 the best way is to open a shared account that both of you have access to. Not sure about the mortgage, can you be added to it?
When we both have jobs, we're going to open a joint checking account for groceries, bills, stuff for the kids, etc., which we will put a certain percentage of our paycheck into. We will also each have our individual checking and savings.
Did you contribute financially to the house at all? X
Sort of. We have a joint account and we each have separate accounts. He pays the majority of the larger bills. Like the mortgage and the car insurance/health insurance/cell phone. I pay for all the utilities. We each pay for our own other personal expenses and we each contribute to paying for my college classes.
We don’t have a joint account but we budget for the bills/ childcare costs/ food shopping etc and work out the total cost and then he sends me half every month. We review it periodically to make sure that the half is still fair x
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