Starting to come to the conclusion my daughter will be a only child, just like me 😭💔
Me and my partner have been together for almost 14 years. We waited so long to have kids, and then we went through infertility struggles for a while before finally having our daughter. I always dreamed of having a big family, at least 3 kids, and I truly thought we would build that life together.
But now, things feel so different. We barely get along anymore, and he has become such a miserable person. It feels like he’s constantly unhappy and always bringing up negative things , many of them situations that he created himself, but now he wants to play the victim in.
Before I had my daughter, I used to stay quiet and be more compliant just to keep the peace. But now that I’m older, and especially now that I’m a mother, I’m exhausted from pretending his behavior doesn’t affect me. It does affect me deeply, and I can’t keep carrying everything like this anymore.
What makes me even sadder is that I still want more children, but now I’m scared. Even if I were to go through IVF with a donor, part of me feels like he would make our lives miserable anyway. It hurts so much because the dream I had for my future and my family feels like it’s slipping away, and I feel overwhelmed and heartbroken.
Dad not agreeing to have son when I want to go for a weekend break.
Right, so this might be a long one. My son is 3 and me and his dad broke up nearly a year ago. It’s been up and down but I’ve done my best for it to stay civil for my son.
Anyway, I asked him about having his son for a long weekend as it’s my 30th this year. He agreed. He then said he was going on holiday for a full week and wanted to swap weekends over. I said that was fine (Makes sense why he agreed about my time away so easily)
This was a couple months ago…
Last night he decided to tell me that he will look after OUR son but everyday he loses from work, he will deduct from child maintenance?
So if he gets 220 a day and loses that, that’s going to be 4 weeks no payments.
Surly this is all about control right?
I literally was looking for the weekend that’s his weekend with my son anyway, so it’s only 1-2 days he would need off and believe me all the stuff I’ve helped him with, including sorting his flat, car and just making sure he’s all set up and he just continuously messes me about and tries to control everything.
Am I right or wrong? What can I do?
If I went to family court, would they sort out an agreement regarding holidays per year/the other parent agreeing to be fair. Like for example, one week per parent can go away and we have to accept it.
As well as the usual every other weekend stuff
Thank you, hope that makes sense! Any advice welcome x
Relationship Struggle
This is a rant so bear with me; I feel like I take care of LO totally alone. Husband has started doing more around the house but purely out of necessity as I have baby or work (while caring for baby) 24/7. And also, whenever he complains about how much it is I just am like hello…who used to do all of this? Me! And more honestly. We barely see each other and when we do I am frustrated with him truthfully, which isn’t fair to him but he just is making me so upset. If he does any caretaking for baby it is along side me, not on his own, and is often disregarding whatever I am already doing.
A huge source of contention is sleep. I have done all over nights always - even hospitalized with pp preeclampsia, I denied pain meds to be able to wake for baby. Took them the next day when my sister came. I had begged him during the first month to let me take a short nap daily and take baby - we were both on family leave. Never happened, during second month I begged him to wake up with us in the morning and take baby after feeding so I could nap. Maybe happened twice after huge sleep deprivation driven blow ups on my end. He also TAKES NAPS and without even saying anything to me and it honestly pisses me right off which is maybe crazy but it does. I get so mad when people ask him “how are you sleeping? Good?” And he’s like “oh we are trying” meanwhile he is getting completely uninterrupted sleep. And every time it happens I get super mad and talk to him and he doesn’t understand and says he is just including my perspective and being nice I’m like nice would be recognizing that I have completely removed the burden of waking at night from you actually not insinuating that night feeds have you tired for some reason. Baby is sleeping much longer now as we approach 3 months so I am not so tired anymore but it is not due to ANY sleep support from him.
Maybe I’m crazy. I don’t even know anymore. RIP my mental stability atp.
