Mamas with depression, anxiety, and other mental health disorders

I lost hope

My husband and I are on a big nasty and ugly fighting streak. We just came back from holidays and everything was fine. But then he pushed me to agree to go visit his family this summer and start making plans without considering everything I had shred before about how I feel staying over at his parents place place for 2 weeks and the whole jetlag and exhaustion. Plus how every tine we travel our toddlers routine goes out the door and I just feel overwhelmed.

Nevertheless I agreed cause it’s important to him. But then he kept pushing for more.

I lost it. In front of our son.

We fought for 2 days straight. I called hin the C word and he said I am a bad person. Then he said he doesn’t want to get pregnant again until I sort myself out.

We called an emergency session with our couples therapist.

Ir helped for a few hours.

Now we’re back at fighting spree.

Not even the safe word works anymore.

He lied to me about not buying more hot wheels. We’re now over 100. He has a problem.

And apparently he is taking pictures of my shit around the house to prove that I am also messy. When he knows I am the one who tidies all the time, does dishes, laundry and cooking.

I felt like hitting him. I am losing control. Our son is witnessing some of this. And I know we cannot let it happen. But it does and none of us puts a stop. We both just keep adding.

I just feel like running away and leaving with my son. But I can’t.

My husband is not from here and he has no one but us.

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Please help

Ps I have depression and anxiety. I tend to get aggressive. I threw my wedding rings at him and told him to sell it. I have done this countless times. I feel like I am despairing and can’t control myself. I have chest pains and just want to cry and disappear into a corner

Hello my lovely ❤️
When you both argue, is it usually both of you just arguing over eachother and not really hearing what the other one is saying?
I'm only asking as I've been through all that...but when we was arguing constantly I found that it helped to text eachother the argument rather than screaming at eachother (if that makes sense)
It seemed to calm down the situation rather than it escalating.

I'm here if you want to chat/vent 😊❤️

I had a very difficult marriage as well. If you are constantly fighting maybe it is time to at lease separate to see how it goes. It is better for your child than to see fighting all the time. I have 2 boys and all they saw was us fight all the time.

First off you are not alone. I am wondering if something is in the air right now that only men can sense? Lol this is what I would call a toxic cycle and if it doesn't get broken..... You both will break. Go to neutral corners. Calm down. If the conversation comes up again just say..... Either we plan to have enough money for a hotel room or you can visit your parents yourself. Then maybe take your son and go visit someone on your side all by yalls self. Now take all of this with a huge grain of salt because my 16 year marriage is in a really really bad state right now so I probably shouldn't be giving advice either. But if you dont get a break..... You will break.

I had to leave my 8-year marriage because things became very toxic and unhealthy. It got to the point where I didn’t even recognise myself anymore. He would often trigger emotional reactions from me, and I always ended up looking like the bad one.

I made the decision to leave because it was affecting me deeply, and it wasn’t healthy for my daughters to witness that environment every few days. We’ve now been separated for a year, and although being a single mum is hard, overall it has been much more peaceful. The girls are calmer too.

I always felt guilty about leaving because he didn’t have family here either, but for once I had to put myself and my daughters first.

in our community

Kindergarten drama?!

I need to rant.
During school morning drop off my heart broke a bit for my 6 year old.
She is such an outgoing, all out kind of kid & I know for some, it can be a lot. Even for adults.
Today she shouted a classmates name to walk in with her and the girl turned around, gave the nastiest look & started to walk away faster. The look on my daughter’s face is what did it for me.
Has anything like this happened to your kid and how did it make you feel?
This is all new to me- having a child in school. I just don’t remember kindergartners being like that.
I wanted to turn around and take her home lol.
Thankfully summer is right around the corner for us!

what are you and your baby doing in this heat?

what activities are you and your lo doing in this hot weather 🫠🥵

Dad going back to work

First time mum to a baby girl who was born end of April at 36 weeks. My husband is going back to work today and I honestly feel like I’m not going to cope at all. He has been off work for four weeks and with me every single day, he was off and with me the whole week before I had an emergency c section because I was quite poorly and the first three weeks of baby as he extended his paternity by one more week. I have honestly been dreading this day SO much since we came home from hospital with baby, and now it’s here, I feel incredible anxiety.

I am pretty much exclusively breastfeeding baby girl, she has one formula bottle in the evening before bed generally or middle of the night but I give that feed to. My husband does every nappy change, outfit change, settled her when I’m tapped out and constantly makes sure I have food and a drink whilst doing all the house work as I seem to constantly be sat down feeding as we are going in and out of cluster feeding every few days. How am I going to cope without that constant support? 😩

I do have some support from family but a lot of them work full time/during the day so can’t help too much when he is in work. My mum doesn’t work but unfortunately our family dog gets too over excited when I am there with the baby and it’s a bit of a nightmare so it’s not like I can even pop there when I am overwhelmed because of that situation.

I have found the entrance into motherhood really up and down. Some days we have good days, she feeds well, naps well, goes down well at night, we can manage to get out for a small walk or a small outing and I feel like we have archived something then the next day things can all go to shit and I feel like I haven’t got an absolute clue how to look after her or settle her. We seem to be going through a few days of cluster feeding where she’s really unsettled and doesn’t sleep then after a day or two it gets better then we go into it again. I don’t do well in general with lack of sleep, never have!, but I’m trying my best to push on. This heatwave is also NOT helping.

I don’t exactly know what I’m looking for out of this post, maybe some advice on how you coped, tips on how to be organised and make the days easier when you only have one pair of hands, some support and encouragement because at the moment, I just feel like the future is hopeless, I won’t be happy again and I just feel like I’ll be trapped in the house every day of my maternity leave just trying to survive.

Whilst I feel all these emotions, I’m sat here crying because of the guilt of feeling like this because I know I am SO lucky to have a supportive husband and to have a beautiful baby girl.

Thank you if you’ve made it this far 💕

Upset

Am I wrong to get upset at my husband for calling his mom when he gets home to catch up and show her the babies???
So long story short my partner is a police officer works long hours and comes home tired sometimes just comes straight to sleep. Tonight however he came a bit early so I was excited and was going to wait to eat with him. When he got home I started making his meat and serving it on a plate when I suddenly hear him on the phone with my mom.
An I wrong for getting upset because I wanted his attention all to myself since I barely get that.?????

Do you make a weekly menu for your household? Are you a SAHM or working (not remotely) mom?

For those who don't make a menu, how do you plan grocery shopping and meals or snacks?

Where do you send your kids who cannot be home alone during summer break When you have work ?

Like if you have a 11-12 year old who maybe cannot be home alone but is too old for daycare ?