HELP

Moms with 3 or more children I'm losing it. I have 4 kids ages 1,5,8,9. It's only me. My husband is over the road driving trucks. My 8 year old has autism and ADHD. My 9 year old is going through her taking back to me phase my 5 year old is learning how to process her emotions my 1 year old soon to be two is going through is terrible twos. Nothing satisfies him. I just don't have it together right now. I'm in my room on my chair with my door locked avoiding them as much as possible they haven't been listening to anything I been telling them. Go sit down go read your book go watch tv. I normally do one on ones with them after school but I don't have the mental space to do that my head hurts I'm going through family problems with my mom and sisters I'm losing it. My husband finally comes back home tonight but they will be sleep. My 8 and 9 year old are giving me the hardest time right now. They constantly fight and tell on each other. My 5 yr old is listening watching TV my 1 yr old is in his pack and play playing with toys yet my 8 and 9 year old are causing stress. I tried separating them but they keep sneaking in each other's personal space I'm just over it. Now they are screaming I gotta go

Read more on Peanut

The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.

Learn more about our guidelines.

Add a comment

I told the bigger kids they have to go to bed early I can't with them right now 😔

I have so much to do. We are getting our patio remodeled Thursday and it's taking everything in my power not to have it rescheduled. When I get overwhelmed I don't feel like dealing with anything

I feel this as well. I have an 11 year old who is going through the hormones and suspected ADHD. A 2 year old who is pushing the boundaries and they both fight all the time and wind each other up.
Then I have a 4 month old who is still waking at night and Im exhausted and have no patience.
My husband doesnt help at night and when he gets home from work all the kids and housework is done. Im mentally exhausted 😩 I said I need a break away to which he replied we should! I meant just me as he went away for a weekend recently and got a break 🤨

OMG I feel this 😭 I love my husband but sometimes I too want to be alone. I'm exhausted I don't Always have the energy to tend to him when I'm already overstimulated. Sometimes he will put the kids to sleep then talk my head off 🥴.. I'm mentally exhausted I'm speechless I can't even put my words together all the way. Kids are hard especially when you're tired and over worked. I love my kids but when I start feeling like this I just want to get away from them

Totally normal, you have SO much on your plate right now. Any human in your shoes would be overwhelmed.

Can you get a break? Like how many days is your husband home for? Can he watch all the kids while you have at least a few hours off? Get out of the house, do something for yourself, get a massage or something.

in our community

How are you doing it all?

My husband is not happy with our sexlife. I don't do it enough and don't do porn star performance.
I try to pour into myself regularly, skincare, hair, light makeup, dressing up, gym and dance classes.
He listed these things out like they were a problem. I'll ask him to watch the kids so I can xyz. Gym and dance classes are normally after I put the kids to bed but thats when he wants my time and attention.
He literally argued for an hour last night. He's done this 3 times, always late into the night when im not in the head space and super tired. By the time he finished his point and calmed down, I believe it was 3 am. And we didnt go to bed until 5 am. He wanted sex, I participated and performed it was enjoyable at first but then it got annoying. I was tired and these days sleep always sounds better than sex he just took so long to finish I was actually getting pissed off.
Today I woke up, I threw on jeans and a tshirt. Basic moisturizer and sunscreen no makeup and clipped my hair back. I wanted to cry. Im worried he's gonna keep complaining about my hobbies and I'll end up quitting to keep the peace.
I'm not perfect, dishes and laundry pile up, the hoise isnt always presentable and food isnt always done sometimes he comes home from work to cook and clean. He feels like hes always helping me with my job but no one is there to help him do his.
I have an appointment next month hoping the Dr can give me something to improve mood and productivity.

Nursery

What age/ the best age and a good age u put ur children into nursery and for how many days each week and hours each day?
Been accepted for 2 different nursery both the same days but different hours and the first day to start nursery are different
First baby so unsure with everything and how it all works thank you

At home with a new born and a toddler

I have a newborn and a 2 year old and they’re not in day care (by choice- I love being at home with them), but my husband has been on paternity leave for the past 3 months and is going back to work next week. I’m a little nervous to be at home alone with both of them trying to juggle the breastfeeding, meals for my toddler, nap times for both, etc etc. Any tips from moms in similar situations?

Venting

My husband lets the baby cry her lungs out till she falls asleep she’s only 1 month old. Maybe im tripping idk, but it makes me upset when he does this because how hard is it to soothe her? It’s not hard and just seeing her laying there crying her lungs out, turning red and tears coming down her face breaks my heart. Obviously I would step in, but I have a feeling he does this so I would stop asking him to watch the baby or take care of here while I get things done. I’ve talked to him about it and he just brushes it off and says “she needs to cry it out”. Has anyone’s partner done the same ?

Need advice

So I’ve been with my fiance for about 2.5 years. I got pregnant pretty much as soon as we got together. I never wanted kids, but decided that since he already had kids, it would be okay. Fast forward two years later, I’m a stay at home mom who has never not worked a day in her life. My husband is the sole provider and he doesn’t make enough money for us to comfortably live. I can’t go back to work bc we don’t have family and daycare is expensive. All we do is stress about money and fight about stupid shit. I’ve felt like I lost my purpose. I feel like I made a mistake. I’m so in love with him. But this is not the life I want. Idk what to do, or how to tell him.

Am I doing something wrong?

I just had a C-section last Monday. I am able to do things but not unless I take my pain meds as prescribed. My partner is here to help me but he sleeps very hard and very deep. He can sleep through the baby crying sometimes. He tells me to wake him up and I try very hard but it always leads to us arguing. Last night it was pretty bad. He claims I kicked him in the rib cage which I didn’t. I did however use my foot to rub his sides. Mind you, before all this I tapped him, talked to him, etc. He responded but I guess it was a fluke because he doesn’t remember that. Only when I “kicked” him.

Today I did it all. Got our 5 year old out the door and been with our 2 week old all day. He came home from dropping off our 5 yo and has been sleep ever since because he said he’s only been getting 3 hours of rest. Am I wrong to start resenting him?