Found out my husband (sorta) cheated

My husbands phone broke last week and he finally took it to Apple yesterday and they were able to fix/recover everything. We’ve never had secrets or hidden things and I have always had access to his phone so last night after he went to bed I went into his hidden photos to make sure my sexy photos I’ve sent were still on his phone or if I needed to send him new ones.

And boy was I SHOCKED. He had THOUSANDS of AI pictures of naked women just all over it from like 2024-mid2025. And if that isn’t bad enough, he had *recent* screenshots of pictures and videos of naked women off Snapchat stories. Starting sometime at the end of summer last year all the way through my pregnancy early this year and during my miscarriage. Even specific ones on the day of our anniversary and 2 days after we lost our baby.

I have felt completely gutted ever since I found them (on accident I was not snooping). My entire body has felt heavy and sick and shaky. I feel so disgusted that these skinny women with huge boobs and butts are all over his phone when I am the biggest I’ve ever been after losing our second child. The worst part is these women look nothing like me. I confronted him and he deleted everything but he didn’t see it as cheating even though I’ve specifically said it before that I’m not okay with it and that if he wants time to himself (which I support) he should only look at pictures of me. I feel like our whole relationship and marriage is just a huge joke. And now I am questioning everything.

If you’ve made it this far, thank you but am I valid for feeling this way? I know I should be but this just took me for complete surprise and I just feel broken.

For the record I don’t want to end our marriage but I also don’t know how to get past this (yet) and I told him if he ever does this again then I’m done.

in our community

Nurseries closing (UK based) but still having to pay!

Would love to know some thoughts because I’m torn on it. Don’t want my little one put at risk in an unsafe environment but also why aren’t we better equipped within the nursery settings? We’ve had enough heatwaves in the UK now to know. Thoughts?

Summer/Heatwave Baby Meals

Does anyone have any meal inspo for this crazy hot weather?? My 9mo LOVES food but it feels odd giving him chilli/dhal in this heat so any recommendations are welcome!

Being a working mom with a SAHD husband is really lonely

I work full time as a nanny (so taking care of children very close in age with my son) while my husband left his culinary career to be a SAHD when we got priced out of childcare only a few months after starting.

SAHM refuse to allow my husband into their special girls only clubs and we cant find any other SAHD in our area so he's completely alone.

I have found mostly moms that judge me for working instead of him, judge me for being a nanny instead of caring for my own son during the day, or get annoyed at my parenting deciscions because I diddnt exclusively breastfeed and contact nap and bedshare.

The working moms all have office jobs so its hard to relate, I have found very little success meeting other blue collar moms in my area, and if one more SAHM tells me they couldn't imagine leaving their baby to take care of someone else's baby all day im going to scream.

Is there ANYONE who can relate, even a little bit?

Advice on Relationship.

Hi Everyone, I’m first time mum at 31 years old and just need some Advice on my relationship whether it’s healthy relationship and it is controlling?

Since we had our daughter together,
I feel like there’s more control now than before like having a go at me how I treat our daughter and doesn’t like that I have opinion on things I feel like I’m walking on egg shells most of the time but it’s ok for him to tell me few weeks ago if we split up our daughter is living with him but I can still come and see her but that’s not for him to decide! He’s grabbed my neck before in argument and he throws things when he’s in heated argument with me in front of our daughter, one time he throw controller at my knee then says stop been pathetic that shouldn’t hurt, When we have Arguments he calls me names like prick, thick cunt, spacker how can you call woman them words except me to be ok with it! Behind closed doors he’s different person to in public but ages ago he kicked off in pub when we was having meal out with our child because I told him he was taking control because he just took my phone off me without asking then started crying because how he reacted I just felt embarrassed to be honest. It is all in my head or is this relationship one sided and controlling?

Potty training

I’ve started potty training today -yes I know in this heat!🤣🤦🏽‍♀️

I’m just unsure what to do for journeys in the car considering it’s the first day would it be undoing everything by putting a nappy on just for the car rides??

Just don’t want him having an accident in the car seat then it smells of urine especially in this heat!🥹🤮😵‍💫

Why?

Am I the only one who gets frustrated when relatives (male) are dismissive of postpartum struggles or try to act like they have the same struggles as women. I'm not saying they don't have any, sleep deprivation all of a sudden, emotional impact from bonding or struggling to bond with child, financial load etc. I'm not ignoring those. But when talking in messages with my dad (had 4 kids). He moaned about waking at 2am and up at 6am in this heat...I wrote back how my LO was up at 9pm/12am/3am/630, 3 of those for feeds (BF). His response "yes, it's hard work, i was one of those soldiers". Errr, tell me sir when you started breastfeeding. Maybe you were up helping with changes etc (sure my mum would say different, not an amicable separation). But you are not physically feeding multiple times in the night and day. My hubby is great he'll get up and grab baby so I can wap me tit out and dream feed without stirring him. But once his head hits that pillow he's out for the count. Where it takes me time to turn my brain off if I wake to much in-between feeds. I just can help be irked that my dad's trying to be all relatable, when I don't think my parents had healthy communication as is. He also worked 12hr shifts so how much was he there in the early days? I obviously don't know. But the pressure on mums day in day out shouldn't be popped in the same boat i don't think. Any ways😂..Just a rant!