Partner not being able to wake during the night

My little boy is 6 months old and from day 1 of him being born, my partner hasn’t gotten up during the night or if he has where I’ve woken him up he just falls back to sleep… I solo parent for 12+ hours during the day on Monday-Friday and sometimes on Saturdays too, so I don’t think I’m asking for much when I ask for a bit of help during the night. When I do wake him at night he can never fully wake up either so it’s like he’s talking but sleep talking a load of rubbish. When he spoke to his parents for advice they turned to me and said they think it all stemmed for when I was in labour for over 4 days and he didn’t get much sleep so he’s just really tired and it’s “understandable”…
Just to add I had an emergency c-section in the end and during the first few nights where I could hardly move, he didn’t even get up then so I had to rely on his mum to help me (even to get to the bathroom!)
I’ve suggested him going into another room to sleep so he gets a full night’s sleep and then the next night he can help… he got really defensive so that didn’t go well!

I feel like I’m starting to resent him for all of this and need some advice if your partner was like this and what helped you? Am I being unreasonable or am I right to feel like this?

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You’re not being unreasonable atall.
My partner worked shifts so literally was not there 4 days a week, but the night he came off the shift he would do all night and I’d sleep else where and literally have a solid 11-12 hour sleep where I was dead.
And the other 3 nights he was off we would do 1 feed each.
By 5m she was waking 6-8x a night with the sleep regression so we actually sleep trained, with a dream feed until 6.5 months and she’s pretty much slept through since (2 years 4m now!) if you’re having alot of wakings I would look to do some sleep training - lots of methods out there, get them connecting sleep cycles, into their own room, it will help your situation for sure as I’m not sure what else you can do to wake your husband up?
X

if he’s not willing to help, get him to pay for a sleep consultant.. it’s not fair on you to do it all the time, you must be exhausted..

i used nightswithnat - she’s on instagram.
she’s brilliant my daughter was waking up multiple times a night, a week with nat an she was sleeping through, best money ever spent x

Oh god the parents' response... 🤯🫠

You arent being unreasonable. We have had our struggles but I breastfeed so and we have a toddler (who my husband now goes to in the night, but he didnt for the first 2 years) but my husband would get up if I asked him to. When your partner wakes up, does he actually get out of bed? Try getting him to get up and walk around / get something / change the nappy to wake him up a bit more, if you havent already? Or make him go splash cold water on his face - hopefully that would wake him up more? How annoying x

You’re not being unreasonable, it’s impossible to do alone and completely unfair. We have a toddler and baby and this time round husband is on toddler duty and I’m on baby as he breastfeeds but with our first he would do nappy changes and burping etc. and get up early in the mornings. I do find that he often needs more waking up . I wake instantly and I do often have to wake him and give him a few minutes to come to sometjmes but I make sure he gets up! 😂

in our community

Should I be worried about my baby?

My little one slept 7.30-5 last night. - usually when he wakes up his nappy is pretty full of urine. When he woke up it wasn’t full at all, there was some but not a lot.
With this heat I’m trying to keep him hydrated obviously but am concerned that he is dehydrated anyways? If he was dehydrated would there be no wee at all? Or am I overthinking this?
TIA, one worried mumma

ROOM TEMP HELP!

my little girl is 6 months , she still sleeps in the room with us , but it’s showing 33 degrees! the other rooms in the house are no better! i’ve got fans on ( not aiming at her of course ) windows are open now that the sun has gone down , all doors are open ( apart from the back and front )she is just in a nappy and seems ok. she did seem irritable earlier but she was fine shortly after , and i am so worried i can’t even get myself to sleep i’ve tried every tip and trick that’s been advised by NHS ext. , what can i do to help bring the temperature down? thanks x

Room temperature

My room is 31 and my daughter's is 30 so not an option. I have put him to bed in a nappy and a cold muzzy over him dunno what else to do worried he will overheat.

Any advice on what you're doing? Thankyou!

Waking for feeds

At what daily ML do you stop waking your baby for a feed or are people doing it from a certain time. My little one got discharged from hospital and is on reduced feeds due to their breathing we are doing little and often but he’s a good 170ml off of what he would usually have at this time and is technically due a feed in 10 minutes but is fast asleep.
I was given an amount for if he wants to feed every 2 hours and an amount if he wants it every 3. We’ve gone to the 3 as per his cues.
He’s a good weight so I’m not concerned about that side of things just worried about dehydration.
Usually he would have a feed anywhere from now to midnight from his own wanting, not me waking him up and then I just leave him the rest of the night and if he wants a feed he will let me know.
Just anxious with it being so warm and was never really given a time of stop waking him from here, but was told to wake in the day.
Sorry for the big long post and ramble😂

Heat...

The coolest room in our house is currently 31 degrees, we've had windows open and got two fans on opposite sides of the room going and nothing is working to drop the temp more.. Our little one is 7 weeks old I'm terrified he'll overheat 😭😭 do I just stay up all night to keep an eye on him?

Reached my max

Anyone else just reached their max over the last couple of days in terms of mothering especially in this heat. Just absolutely had a breakdown crying once I finally got him to sleep. I’ve had a headache all day, been tired, hot, etc. but you just can’t stop. Took us 4 hrs to get him to sleep.