Friendship Differences

Hi ladies 🤍💖

I’m a stay at home mum to 3 kids, and I have a friend who has a 9 month old. We don’t often talk parenting, and connected through this app more as just individuals outside of being mums. However as people do, as a parent I tend to align myself with other parents who believe the same things as I do when raising kids. We have recently started talking parenting and I’ve found out that since her baby was tiny she just sits him in front of the TV all day. I’m not against TV, my older children watch it, however I personally don’t think babies should watch it all day, it just doesn’t align with my parenting at all. Each to their own, however it’s made me want to distance our friendship as I feel like we aren’t as each others person as I thought we were. Do you think it’s wrong to do this? Is there a way I could approach distancing myself where she won’t feel like I’m judging her?

I’m doing mentally well for the first time in ages and I really only want to surround myself with people who are my sort of people ☺️

in our community

Is tv time here and there really that bad?

My almost 2 year old is full on....sometimes I get so exhausted from trying to entertain him all day that by dinner time I often end up giving in and allowing some cartoons. This evening he was so difficult screaming and whining that I set fire to the tea towel on the hob trying to get his spaghetti out as fast as I could....
Sometimes I just have to put his TV on.for a bit so he just stops...sits for a while and calms down....stops the endless whining and tantrums. Even with my partner here we can't always entertain him and we both end up burned out by the noise and behaviour. I feel so guilty though :(

Absolutely miserable

Been with my husband for 12yrs
(married for 4yrs)

We have a 2yr old and a 9wk old, and im literally so fed up and tired waiting for thing to get better since having our 2nd baby.

He cries majority of the day and ive done all the nights on my own as ebf so have had broken sleep for over 2mnths as the week up to having baby I wasnt sleeping either, I get sleep deprivation magnifies everything

But I am so angry all the time mainly with my hubby, feel like I can't stand him atm

He works mon-fri 5am til 5:30pm. Ive been trying to explain how tired I am etc and he just throws back at me how hes tired too, I tried to explain again the above and he responded with if I did 5hrs driving a day and some days no breaks id be tired too hinting hes more tired or just as tired as I am... I said difference being I would get another job as hes right I wouldnt do it.

He just annoys me so much i said he doesn't get it and needs to learn to understand because all its doing is missing me off, he walked away from me into the garden.

I do all the nights alone whilst he sleeps through. I do 95% of newborns nappies i could count on 1 hand how many he has done.

Im wishing the time/weeks away in the hope that things get better as I get it will eventually but my gosh im so miserable right now its unreal.

We are not eating dinner separately as by time he cooks it its usually 8:30pm and I dint want to eat so late, he doesn't want me to cook, I said im gonna get ready meals as its easier for me to eat with our toddler at 5pm. He asked how long for etc and cooking for me is what he looks forward to, but I said it causes me too much stress in the eve. I just wana eat and feed baby then go to bed. We have no routine and until there is one thats the best thing for me to do, which he isnt happy about. I told him he could have ready meals too, or cook and I will have it the next day at a time I want it etc

Don't know what I want from this , I guess just somewhere to vent and be heard as clearly he isnt listening or getting it 🫩

Eating out

I have an 11 week old and I miss going out with my husband, even just for a coffee. My daughter is a very chill child but I still struggle to plan and make it work. When did you start going out with your children? Coffee/lunch? I can leave her with her grandma but would like to know when it will be possible to take her with us.

Leaving baby over night for first time

Hi mums!

Looking for some advice. I’m planning for my baby to stay with my brother and his partner soon over night so my partner and I can go to our staff do.

I’ve never left my baby before over night. He’s 14 months. They are very trusted family members and their little one is the same age as my baby. So it’ll be like a little cousin sleep over.

I can’t help but be filled with mum guilt and anxiety. My partner and I both work full time at the same job and split childcare between us. One does morning shift and other does night shift and in return the parent not working is looking after my baby. He’s not in nursery.

We both need some time to let our hair down a little bit and just breathe. I know we deserve the night to go out with pure friends and then slip off to relax as a couple but I can’t help but feel like I’m being selfish and that my baby is too young?

How old was everyone when their baby had their first sleepover? Am I being unreasonable or selfish? I actually think my sister in law and brother are looking forward to looking after him as they have picnics planned and already have everything a baby would need. I’m hoping when he gets to their house he will be interested in all of his cousins toys that he doesn’t have at home lol!

I am really lucky to have this opportunity to leave him somewhere trusted and safe with two family members who are extremely trustworthy.

Not only do I think it’ll be good for my relationship, but I want my baby to have quality time with his family. They all love him so much , and when we go to visit them he has so much fun. I want him to get used to being with family without mum and dad there.

Last nerve

I am literally on my last nerve girls!!

I do every night feed, change most nappies, put baby to sleep basically every single night, bath her, wash bottles, sterilise bottles, etc.
The odd time, yes my partner will feed her a bottle or put her to sleep (by this I mean putting her down and hoping for the best). But I do the brunt of everything.
Today my partner got up with LO at 8am (I got up with her at 3.30am) and I got up at 9am. He just made a comment to me saying “you feed her and actually have a turn.”

I am ABSOLUTELY LIVID. I am at the stage I feel like a single mother and I genuinely don’t know if I can be with this man anymore.

Yes, he works Monday-Friday but I will be going back to work in September and I don’t know how I will cope. Knowing when I come home I’ll most definitely need to tidy up, wash bottles and probably put her to bed. My work days are 14 hour shifts.

Does anyone have any advice before I lose my mind?

I need other opinions!!

Can people please tell me what their baby’s dads were like with their first born? I feel like men are just incapable of being a parent to a newborn well mine is anyway!! He’s 3 months old now, I send him the baby’s feeds every day he watches everything I do but still doesn’t know how to look after him on his own. “I don’t know when to feed him” “I don’t know when he wants his nappy changed” “I don’t know when he’s tired” how do I know then????

Why are the mums always the default parent? I haven’t had 1 day to myself I am constantly looking after the baby. He offers to do things but only when he can see I’m about to do it.

Today I’ve been so tired because the baby woke a few times last night not once has he offered to have him for me to just have a quick nap. I mention this to him, he then offers at 6pm, when I am due to pump? Who wants to nap at 6pm??

The list could go on and on and on and on but I haven’t got time to even say the half of it.

I just want to know does it get better or is it just a case of MEN

Rant over