*long post* if you stay til the end/share input thank you
I am considering leaving my fiancé.. We have been on and off for about 6 years. I forgave him for infidelity, emotional & verbal abuse.
When I was completely done with him, I found out I was 2 months pregnant. That’s how we got back together and stayed together without breaks for about 2 years.
It took ALOT for me to trust him after the countless times he had cheated on me. He was truly treating me right since the moment I found out I was pregnant but at 3 months pp ( I am now 13 months pp ) I saw his TikTok and he was lusting over women. I even had a girl reach out to me a week later because he liked her TikTok story which was a booty pic. That situation created alot of problems & a lot of previous issues resurfaced.
Anyway, I forgave him and yet again kept finding the same stuff all over again.. . Yes I was dumb but I was postpartum and very vulnerable. I blame myself a lot. I even said yes to his proposal 6 months after that ( VERY stupid ).
So fast forward, we have been arguing over everything!!! But these last 4 times have been TERRIBLE. The emotional and verbal abuse has begun again. He will get mad and start calling me dumb, an idiot, start yelling and screaming. Pushes me to my limits then records me when I cry/retaliate to make me seem like the bad one. Every single one of those times he has taken EVERYTHING BACK. I’m talking, engagement ring, gifts, clothes. Literally everything he has “ given “ me. After packing his stuff he will drive off to his dad’s house and stay there for days on end.
We had such a BIG fight this last time that my parents stepped in and told him none of that was ok & he had to respect me. He said yes and was very embarrassed.
Well we just argued right now and I wasn’t feeling like sleeping in bed with him so I set my sleeping place on the floor.
He got so mad at me for doing that so yup he packed up everything again & left. I’m so sick and tired of this. I don’t feel like I’m overreacting but at the same time I’m confused because for years nobody has stepped in to defend me so I’m just unsure.
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No

Please leave. This is not a safe relationship for you or your child to be in. For the sake of your child you just get out of this situation. You want them to grow up in a healthy environment and not learn that abuse is normal and that love is conditional on you behaving in a way that your abusive partner demands.

As soon as I saw infidelity it’s a big fat no!!!! I didn’t even read the rest. If he can cheat on you he doesn’t love, respect or value you

A lot of people won't step in to someone elses relationship. Why are you expecting to saved rather than valuong yourself and stepping away from a toxic relationship you had already decided to leave.
He is abusing you.
Read what you wrote. How can you wrote that and not know it is absolutely not ok.
What would you say to your child if they came to you and said exactly what you are saying now?
Please, for your safety and your child's, leave this man. Do it quietly and quickly. Get a lawyer, get a restrainong order if that is an option.
No one who loves you, treats you this way.
I hope you are able to get out and heal!