Would this bother you?
My “best friend” and I have been friends for over 15 years and were bridesmaids at each others weddings, Godmothers for each others kids etc. However, I’ve been having a bit of a tough time over the last few years and I just feel like she hasn’t been there for me at all.
I don’t really talk about stuff lots as I don’t want to be really miserable to be around, bit shes fully aware of everything that’s been happening, and she sort of just dismisses it all. My 4 year old is very challenging and we think has ADHD, and he has some massive meltdowns. Twice I’ve messaged her saying we had to leave events as he had awful meltdowns and I ended up getting home and just crying, and all she commented both times was that the events we were at “sounded lovely”. On the day we had the health visitor round because we wanted to see if we could get some support, she texted and asked what I’d been up to and I mentioned that and she completely ignored it and just replied about something else I’d said. I’ve also had 6 miscarriages and during the last one last year I told her I was pregnant again and was so scared of the ultrasound I was having through the recurrent miscarriage clinic. She didn’t even text me again until a week after the scan, and even then never brought it up until I mentioned it to her.
The most recent thing that has sort of caused me to think about everything is last week my son had a surgical procedure under general anaesthetic. It wasn’t a big procedure but I told her how scared I was as it was really traumatic last time when he had general anaesthetic, and also the results of the tests he was having could indicate he needs major surgery. Again a week went by before she texted, and her text was all about other stuff with an “How did the appointment go?” thrown in at the end. I told her this time I felt upset that she hadn’t messaged and she just said “Definitely wasn’t deliberate. How did it go?” I haven’t yet replied.
I know everyone has busy lives, but I know I’d have messaged my best friend in less than a week if her child was having surgery or if she was having an ultrasound after 5 miscarriages, and it’s just made me really sad and think maybe it’s time to quietly end the friendship. However, I know I’m very sensitive and even more so at the moment, so I just wanted to get a bit of perspective from others. Is this something that would bother you or not?
second baby mum guilt
I recently delivered my second daughter a few days ago and I am starting to really struggle with the guilt of not being able to do as much with my first. she’s 3.5 and i’m a single mum so i am all she has and it’s always been just us. to deliver my second i had to have a c section which has left me in a lot of pain during recovery, im unable to stand for long periods of time, run around with her and get on the floor. to help her keep her sleep whilst i’m in the newborn trenches, my mum has been staying with us and she sleeps in with her in her bedroom whilst i’m in mine with the baby.
i miss her every night and it’s starting to get too much, i just feel like im failing her in every avenue and i don’t want her to feel like she’s being abandoned or replaced
my mum can’t stay with us forever, eventually i will need to figure out a routine that means i can be accessible to both girls
i am utterly terrified and i can’t stop myself from regretting having my second baby, i was initially with her dad but we split a short while into the pregnancy and he’s no longer involved, i just sometimes wish i did things completely different and i hate myself for thinking like that
i feel completely stuck and alone
Should I continue EBf my 7month old or switch to formula?
Hi everyone, FTM here, EBF a beautiful 7-month-old and going through the weaning process. I haven't been consistent due to being so tired. There are times when I'm confident in the amount I'm producing for her, and there are days when I'm anxious about it due to the number of times she's on me. I love watching her feed from me, but I hate that I don't trust my body enough to know that I am.
Not sure if I'm making sense here, but I'm so overwhelmed and find myself tearing up about making this choice.
