Do you agree with this statement?

As a parent, you should look for and work the job that works around your child’s schedule and not the other way around.
Also I’m not posting this to fight. I’m just curious what other moms think. I’m a mom of two small kids and I’m struggling to find a job that doesn’t require my kids to be in daycare the whole day.

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Some people have dream jobs! And others make a lot of money that they wouldn’t otherwise make if they did that.

I love my job. My life does not revolve around my kids.

I think it depends on the mom... I worked in administration of a home health care company before I got pregnant. I loved my job, got pregnant had my baby... couldn't imagine not being around him all the time... i quit my job, took a massive pay decrease to work at his daycare and that's where I've stayed for 4 1/2 years now.

But there are also alot of women who are both happy and fulfilled with their jobs and spending that time away from home life and kid life to be themselves too. And then they come home and they're mommy

Definitely depends how career driven you are, for me my life does revolve around my kids. The job I was in before my second was born I didn’t love anymore but it allowed me to work from home a lot and be flexible for my toddler so I said I’d stay in it for as long as it worked and I can’t see it working for me after my second mat leave is over. I can’t see myself ever not working because it does matter to me, so me and my partner are currently looking at ways for me to be self employed.

Some people want a career and some just a job that pays! I’m happy to put my big corporate career on the back burner for now but I can equally understand why a lot of mothers wouldn’t, it takes a lot of hard work and sacrifice especially as a woman, to climb the ladder.

I think we are sold a bit of a lie as women that “you can have it all” because we can’t, something’s got to give.

It’s nice in theory lol. But finding a job that is 100% conducive to a child’s schedule is not easy. And some people love what they do and don’t want to and that’s perfectly fine too.

I mean, the vast majority of people have jobs before they have kids. I guess it depends somewhat on if it’s a job vs a career, but how many jobs really fit into a child’s schedule? This is honestly just a strange question to me.

No I don’t agree. I think it depends on what works best for each family.

It depends I was very work driven before kids worked my way to the top one of the reasons I had kids later, then struggled 😅 however as soon as I had my first I knew I didn’t want that job anymore I loved being a mum that was my priority then I got pregnant again so it was definite I was quitting.

Now I have no idea what I want to do I might do freelance accountant then I know I can work around my girls.

in our community

I’m exhausted

So my husband told me tonight that I’ve changed and that he no longer feels desired by me because I don’t make comments towards him the way I used to and I don’t respond the same when he makes comments towards me and that makes me feel like a shitty fucking wife.

Because I do desire him and what he doesn’t seem to understand is that I’m all fucking touched out.

I had to watch my body change over 8 months. I stretched, I bled, I threw up. I had to stop doing things I loved, I was sick and exhausted all the time. Then I was drugged and had seven layers of flesh, muscle, nerves and organs cut open to have our son. Then I was stitched closed seven different times. I hurt, I couldn’t move like normal, I was exhausted and felt gross.

Lucas loves to be held. And I love to hold him. But fuck recently it feels like I’m doing the most. Which is fine, I’m his mom, but I can only be in so many places and pulled in so many directions at one time.

I get peed on. I get pooped on. I get spit up on and slept on and my hair pulled all while trying to hold and sooth and change my clothes and shower and be put together when I want to be anything but.

I keep track of where we’re going, what we’re doing, when the baby eats or sleeps, when his bottles get washed or the laundry was done or the snakes were fed. Even when my husband does have him, I get asked questions. Where’s this? Where’s that? Did you move this thing? And it’s always in the same spot if he just took the two seconds to look. I can never seem to have five minutes to myself.

I can make a bottle, hold the baby, let out the dog, and play a card game without even blinking. I can shower and rock his swing, and wash my hair all while my mind is blank.

It’s gotten to the point where I am hearing cries that aren’t there.

I cried for the first time since I had Lucas tonight. And it’s not his fault, that will never be something he understands. But sometimes I can’t tell when he’s joking versus when he’s serious and sometimes I just want to be held and told that shit is going to be okay and things will start to feel somewhat normal again.

I’m not resentful. At all. He’s great and when I was in the hospital and even just getting home, he was amazing. But my feelings were hurt. I feel like I’m not listened to, I’m not seen, and I’m just fucking exhausted.

Having a 2nd child while 1st one has medical issues/delays.

Hey all. I have a 10 month old. I always wanted 2 kids and I’m trying to decide if we should start trying again soon. But my son has epilepsy and some pretty serious developmental delays coming up. He still can’t sit. Isn’t crawling. He may never walk, (or it could take 3-5 years). He will mostly be nonverbal. Chance he won’t be able to bathe himself, feed himself etc.

So does anyone else have children with high needs? Is it totally stupid to have another? Would I be putting us all in a worse position? Will the regret of not having another eat me alive? Would the mom guilt of having another eat me alive?

I am his full time caregiver now so I’m home full time. It was a totally random and insanely rare diagnosis (.0001%) so my 2nd child wouldn’t have it.

It feels like an impossible decision and I’m not even sure what needs to be considered in order to have another. I just don’t wanna wait too long cause im already 32 and it took us 5 years to conceive my son.

Any help appreciated.

So toxic

I love my husband with all of my heart and I know he loves me the same but damn we are so toxic for each other and I don’t know what to do. If we argue it never gets solved. He’s avoidant. I’m anxious attachment and we are both stubborn and stuck in our ways. I have legitimate reasons to get upset (but I don’t talk about them the right way), he takes no accountability and he’ll want space. I want to fix it immediately. But here’s the thing. I’ve tried the giving space thing. I’ve tried to communicate differently. Nothing works with him. He’s 50 years old and has been like this his whole life. He’ll leave for a drive. Which angers me more because I wish I can just say fuck my parental responsibilities and go for a drive. So I call him 150 times just to get ignored. Then he’ll finally say he takes some accountability, he’ll do better, I’ll do better and then it just repeats. It’s exhausting. He never wants to talk, his problem with me is all I want to do is talk it out.. yet we never talk it out because he always refuses. So the same argument happens again in three days. It’s actually annoying. I know I have a lot to work on myself because I hold things in until i explode but a lot of these arguments would never happen if he didn’t do half the things he does. Like today. He slept all day because he drank a lot at a 4th of July party last night. So I was alone on baby duty yesterday. Alone on baby duty today. When do I get to just sleep all day? But I can’t talk to him about it because god forbid. So I hold it in and end up snapping because I’m overwhelmed and mentally exhausted. Any advice? We are never going to leave each other so I’m just looking for ways to promote better communication ig.

How do you know when it’s time to start potty/toilet training?

My little boy is 22 months and understands the meaning of the potty now. He’s had a couple of wees on there but nothing more than that. He’s started to tell us when he’s having a poo but doesn’t tell us when he needs a wee.

Is this a sign to start? I don’t want to force it upon him. I was going to get a seat for the toilet with the ladder also but will this confuse him going from potty to toilet? I only wanted to put him on the potty for convenience when we’re out and about with the carry potty incase we aren’t near a toilet.

Any advice is perfect x

Am I wrong here?

Am I wrong for feeling annoyed at my husband asking what’s for dinner? do we have anything easy we can throw in the oven? after I’ve spent nearly an hour resettling the baby after she woke up 10 minutes after I put her to bed (it’s hot in her room and also she’s not well). Like, what have you been doing while I’ve been struggling my ass off with the baby? He’s making me feel like I’m overreacting for snapping at him and telling him to look for himself

Grandparents “hitting” your kid

So just for context, my kid is almost 1 years old. And yesterday she was more whiny towards the end of the day.
I figured she needed a diaper change and was just ready for bed.

I’m getting everything ready to get her to the bed a nice warm bottle , getting her clothes ready all these things and her grandmother makes a comment “I think it’s time for taps“ and she’s made this comment before and she was referencing to like spanking my child and I told her you’re not hitting my kid.

my mother watches my daughter during the day when I go to work and she had made the comment back to me that “I don’t watch kids that I can’t hit“ and I’m trying to figure out if I’m overreacting or if I just need to go ahead and find someone else to watch my kid because now I don’t trust her