Pronouns
I became friends with a mum on here I have 2 daughters 5 and 3. And her children who were born female 5 and 3 as well. We met up everything was good , something happened on the playground and my daughter came to report to us saying “she hit me” the mother said my child isn’t a she , my child is a they , you shouldn’t assign your child a pronoun before they can decide. She was quite annoyed and angry when she said that.
I was shocked because I’ve never met someone who has new pronouns. I let it go my daughter came back and reported the same thing and the mother says the same thing and began teaching my daughter about pronouns and that my daughter can basically decide whether she’s a “they them etc and said all the pronouns available” I decided to end the friendship because l don’t want my children to learn that kind of thing just yet and I’m not really into that per say.
What would you do was l wrong
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Tough one. I don't think it's wrong for your children to learn about pronouns, in the same way I wouldn't consider it wrong for them to learn about same sex marriages etc. there will be children that have parents or family members who are non-binary and therefore may be discussing it in the playground etc.
I do feel quite uncomfortable about how the mum reacted though - to get angry with anyone for misgendering someone if they are not aware is ridiculous, let alone a child 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️ and to make the decision to then teach your daughter isn't her place.
So in a round about way, no I don't think you were wrong to end the friendship but I would think that this is something that you'll need to consider that your children will come into contact with soon so maybe you could consider how you wish them to be introduced, ie. You having that conversation off of the back of this interaction
I don't think you was wrong tbh. She over stepped a boundary and should have asked you if you was ok with her educating your child on the whole pronouns thing.
I guarantee she would have an issue if you tried to educate her child about the fact they were born female and that by normal terms would be referred to as a she/ her and that she can decide if thats what she wants.
The boundary works both ways and she stepped over it.n
It's so unusual to raise kids in a completely gender-neutral way like she is that she can hardly be shocked or cross that someone refers to her daughter as "she". Is the mum really going to go around correcting everybody? What about school? It would potentially make the child a target. It does sound like a lot of unnecessary drama tbh. But not because the kids are too young to learn about it, I don't think there's anything wrong with that personally - although at that age it would probably be a bit complex and go over their heads anyway. If the child was actively gender-questioning and they themselves wanted that, then that would be different, and I would never end a friendship over that. But the mum should still give ppl a heads up in advance - you can hardly be expected to just know!
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