Losing my mind here…can’t seem to get my toddler to start using the potty!!

So, I’ve been trying since March and initially she went a few times with a LOT of effort from me but then she refused to do a number 2…she kept holding it in until she became constipated. Anyway, she ended up getting quite ill so I stopped potty training her altogether, now I’m desperately trying again because she’s turning 3 and will be attending nursery in Sep. The nursery has said she should be potty trained so I’m panicking…I’ve started potty training her again but the same thing is happening!! She holds both pee & poo in and has now become constipated again!! She’s just so scared of doing anything in the toilet…God, what do I do? I feel like I’ve tried everything, being calm, distracting her, playing with her etc. taking her every half hour, sometimes even 10 mins. Nothing seems to be working! Any advice? 😭

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Have you tried playing a potty song video and using rewards like gummies? I will say that your daughter can probably feel your anxiety over it, so that might make things worse. We didn’t get our daughter started until 3 yrs old and it worked out fine

Have you tried a potty or just the toilet? Have you tried a reward chart, maybe pick a few rewards together she can look forward to.
Mine didn’t want to use the toilet at all at first, she’s 4 and only recently started preferring the toilet, but still uses the potty 50% of the time.
Has nursery tried to help, ours have been great with both of mine, have started helping training my almost 2 yr old too.

My advice (and every child is different, so take what you like and leave the rest) - toileting is built into the routine. When she wakes up, say “it’s time to go potty”. Build in skills of pulling her own pants down and have a step stool so she can go up by herself. She should sit, every time. Even if she says she doesn’t want to or doesn’t have to. My son’s toddler teacher advised that “as long as the child isn’t crying, it’s okay to keep going” - so even when my son is resisting going potty, by the time we get his clothes off, he is ready to go ahead. Before this stage, I would just keep having him sit down on the toilet (the little bjorn one) until he went potty. Every 90 minutes I think should be a good starting point and then increase frequency if she is constantly filling her underwear in between. Oh! Make sure she’s in underwear all day except naps. We are still in the process with my son (almost 2.5) and he knows the mechanics, but he doesn’t want to sometimes. Keep going!

I bribed my toddler 😂 when he would go pee, he got an m&m. When he would poop, he would get a bigger piece of candy like a gummy worm or a tootsie roll or piece of chocolate.
My SIL gave my niece a cookie when she did.

If your toddler like Ms. Rachel at all, she has an episode on potty training that makes it fun.

Tbh I bribed my daughter with smarties for a wee and a lollipop for a poo. Over time I stopped for the wees. Still having issues with poos but taking it one day at a time.

Try pull ups and baby can always pull them down when she goes for a wee?

Also the Miss Rachel video was very helpful

I thought it was just me! We've been trying for 3 weeks now, she seems to be doing better just having her naked but man its been a task for sure

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