Has being a mother and raising a kid been an easy or hard experience?

The day to day experience for me has been fairly easy, if were talking about my child's temperment and the fact that my husband does his fair share without me ever needing to nag, and I get a good amount of time to myself.

However the life changes of having a child is Hard. We cant just spend every Saturday evening at the cinema, we cant randomly spend a weekend away, or go to gigs or spend £300 on whatever we want now. Everything, everyday, every penny is planned around what my daughter wants and needs.

I feel society makes it harder than it needs to be. Crappy partner. Etc. I hated raising my first two and will never act like I didn’t. I was abused and used throughout the entirety of their lives. This one I’m choosing to not work and just be present with baby. Slow life, poor yea but I had money and things and it did not make like easier or more enjoyable. So I’m choosing poverty even though I still have internal conflict over the idea and dread of raising a child poor intentionally. I have no support and I don’t want them in daycare or school, seeing how my older two turned out. I want change and an easier simpler life this go around.

I don’t know I think the society makes it out harder than what it is. The constant comparison to other mothers on socials, the constant marketing of all those items that you supposedly can’t live without while raising a child, the pressures of “not losing yourself” or whatever else propaganda other people spread. And the almost impossible economic situation making mothers worry about making money and all that when all we really want is spend days with our babies

I think it's a HUGE responsibility and can be all consuming in a way it's basically impossible to explain to someone who doesn't have kids. However I avoid saying being a mum is my "job", even though I'm currently a SAHM, and I absolutely wouldn't claim my life is more important or harder than that of anyone else who doesn't have kids. I don't see a need to compare. I do agree that women in particular are sold a dream that doesn't always match the reality, there's a big culture of women telling other women how they simply MUST have children, judging other women for "only" having one, judging women who don't want them at all, in ways that most men don't encounter. I've had many women insist that I should have kids (especially hard to hear during fertility treatment may I add) but none of those women were also cautioning me about the way in which my life would change and the absolute lack of free time/quiet time 😂 then as soon as you're pregnant they start with "just wait...." 🙄