How do you feel about having your in-laws for five days in your home when your newborn will be 1 month old?

Hi all, my mother will come to help me after and before the birth for few weeks while my in laws would like to stay with us for 5 days or a week when the baby will be around 1 month. They are really nice people but I don’t feel comfortable living with them for few days while I’ll be still recovering and likely breastfeeding hence I’ll be with my breasts out most of the day, and being super uncomfortable, without having enough space and privacy. Plus my toddler will be home with a babysitter for a while and it might become overcrowded. Am I over worrying? I obviously don’t have the same issue with my parents but my inlaws they might struggle to accept they are not welcome in this delicate phase, especially because they are coming after one month and not immediately.
Any advice? My friends don’t really get it because they live with their parents nearby and do not have the issue of having parents abroad that must stay with you when they come to visit you because a hotel would be a crazy option to propose.

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I wouldn’t want anyone staying over just after giving birth. You’ll be adjusting and creating a bond with your baby and won’t want everyone around you

Have they already booked tickets...?

I feel you with breastfeeding. How does hubby feel …. Did you talk to him about your side

they already booked the flights and only one way for now 👀
my husband wants them around because he would like for his parents to get to meet their grandchild and spend some time with the baby. He told me after one month from the birth I should feel more comfortable and ready for them to come, but only the idea stresses me out

I am living in my mother in law's home and she loves to have people over. I didn't get much of a choice about having visitors within a day of baby being born. I'm not saying this out of self pity but rather to say that it wasn't that bad. It was nice to have some adult conversations. I had to quickly become comfortable enforcing my boundaries. If I needed to go pump, or if the baby needed a quiet space to sleep, or if it was time to feed her and I wasn't comfortable with somebody else doing it, I made my needs known. Everyone has been very respectful and would leave to give us quiet time if prompted. I think it's been the best for my husband, since it's his family. Being in the newborn bubble has been hard for his mental health, so being able to talk to people about non baby stuff for a while helps a lot.

I would have them stay in a hotel close by! I don't think there's anything wrong with that.

Absolutely no chance, they can stay in a hotel and I’d be making sure they’re aware they’re not sitting in my house all day. When your husband gives birth and breastfeeds he can dictate how long he wants his parents to stay. Until then, he needs to back you and tell them himself x

Yep hard no for me. They can stay near by but not in my house

in our community

Teething hack

Thought I’d post this here because I’ve not met a single person that knows this exists. Either my friends and family live under a rock or it’s simply not common. This anbesol liquid (specifically the liquid) has saved my life. As soon as I put this on my babies gums it instantly works. He handles teething so well, not been an issue for me at all. I keep one in his baby bag and one in the house and never leave the house without it. It’s only suitable from 5 months I think. Hope this helps 🩷

My husbands kindness is ruining our lives and I’m sick of it

I loved how kind my Husband was when we met, but now it just feels like it’s gone too far and I’m sick of it. He does everything for everyone, and most of these people don’t care about him at all. He’s too self sacrificing to the point he’s just constantly screwing me and the kids over. We always come last.

We have plans, but a friend needs help moving or fixing their car or just got dumped and he’s right there to help and our plans get overrided. He gave our electric bill money to a guy who knew in high school who just had a baby and was left by his baby mama, and now we have a shut off notice on the door. He gave the battery OUT OF HIS CAR (not a spare) to some guy visiting the neighbors house, because his battery was shot and get couldn’t get home. He moved in a relative into our spare bedroom who was evicted, who refuses to get a job and is rude as fuck to me and the kids. He gave our son’s bike to the kid down the road who had his bike stolen. He takes in stray animals all the time, but it becomes my responsibility because he’s never home and always manages to get stuck somewhere helping someone. He was too nice to the single mom across the street and that got really messy… He has eaten maybe ten hot meals at the table with the family in about two years because he’s always on call as a volunteer firefighter and takes every single call. He’s missing our whole lives…but he says we have forever to do these things and these people need help today. Also, we barely survive paycheck to paycheck.

Meanwhile, something breaks in our house or we need a babysitter or literally anything, and none of these people are anywhere to be found, and if they do show up they bitch and curse at us the whole time that it’s stupid they had to get off work to work for more but for free.

I tell him all the time they are taking advantage and he just doesn’t seem care. He says we need to help others when we can, and kindness is key, and good karma will come back around eventually…. But I’m just tired of working hard to do nice things for our family and they always fail because he’s so focused on everyone else life. We don’t have forever, because tomorrow is never promised. But when I say that he tells me to not be so negative, and just trust him.

Everyone thinks I’m crazy…

My soon-to-be ex-husband is a horrible person and is asking for me to waive child support. Everyone and their mother says I need to ask for the standard 17%. I honestly don’t think that’s right because he doesn’t make much more than me and if the goal is for our child to have equal standards of living at both households then it wouldn’t be equal at all. My ex wouldn’t be able to afford rent. The only way I can is because I don’t have student loans and my dad paid for my car/auto insurance. Even though my ex has emotionally abused me and continues to do so I believe that if his life gets better then the better our child’s life will be. His life will get better if he can provide a home for his time with our son. I actually don’t understand why people are saying I shouldn’t care if he goes bankrupt. Child support isn’t about revenge. He already lost at life by me dumping him. I left him for a reason and I’m so happy about that and my life is already so much better without him. Plus he pays half for everything anyway. Literally 50/50 plus we care for him the equal amount of time a week. It doesn’t make him any less of an abuser towards the mother of his child but I still have a problem with taking money that he doesn’t have. So am I really that crazy?

Small gestures

Do you notice/appreciate random kind gestures?
Today I was pushing my pram towards the playground and I asked my 4 year old if he'd open the gate for me. He is usually really good but today he was trying to pull the gate open from the hinge side and he wasn't getting very far 🤣❤️ suddenly from nowhere another boy who was about 8 jumped up from eating his ice cream and ran towards the gate to help. My son had managed to pull it open and the other boy paused and went back to his bench. I turned to him and thanked him and he smiled back at me and I just thought 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 what a kind boy. Last week I was trying to get through the door into Costa and not a single person stood to help me! I don't feel entitled to help but I am by nature a helpful person and would never sit by and watch someone struggle. On Sunday I walked across town with a couple of tourists to help them find their hotel (I'm rubbish at directions but I knew where it was!). Offering to get something off a top shelf for someone who can't reach is something I also love to do.
Basically I love to help and I love to see others help too.

Share your favourite experiences below!!!

Need to vent

Does anyone else feel completely alone, even though they have a partner?
I love my baby more than anything, but lately I feel like I'm doing this on my own. I'm the one taking care of the baby most of the time, and I'm exhausted. My partner thinks that because I'm on maternity leave and he's working, I should be the one with the baby all the time. We don't even live together yet, so it makes everything feel even harder.
I also have a son to care for, and some days I honestly feel like a single mom all over again. I just wish I had more support and for someone to understand that being home with a baby isn't a break—it's exhausting too.

Meal ideas

Good morning!

I’m really struggling for meal ideas for my little one. She has both a dairy and egg allergy and I feel like every meal I make is some form of pasta or orzo 🫠 any ideas would be amazing

Not looking for snacks or breakfast ideas as we kind of have those down, but lunches or dinners are where I’m struggling