Should i get a gift or be petty

You shouldnt base your decision on if they got you a gift, base it on other factors like friendship level, can you afford it, most importantly do you want to. Be the person you want to be imo.

You cant win by basing decisions on being petty

The gift is your presence 😜

If the wedding was in the UK would you have spent 5k on a present?

Just get them a nice card wishing them all the best

I would say you don’t really have to get a gift, especially because you’re already spending so much just to attend the wedding. A card (with maybe a $20-$50 gift card, if the budget permits) would suffice.
But I wouldn’t base my decision on if they got me a gift or not.
If you guys are really friends, being petty is never the answer.

Being petty would be to get them something mega heavy so it messes with their luggage allowance lol

But seriously, just get them something if you like them (which if you’re going to their wedding you should do) no point overthinking? 🤷🏼‍♀️

If I go to a destination wedding, I don’t give a gift. I didn’t expect one at my wedding either.
And I don’t see the point of writing a card if I’m not providing a chèque or some sort of gift card in the envelope to be honest. So I don’t think there was ill intent. The fact that they made it all the way to your wedding shows that they love you and obviously wanted to be there.

I personally have never flown anywhere for a wedding. I have drove 6-10 hours. Where I’m from (Iowa, US) every guest gives a gift (it would be very bad taste to not) and the rule of thumb is to spend approximately the amount that was spent per person at the wedding, regardless of travel. I think that’s a dumb rule 😂 because people should spend what they want/can afford. Also how are you supposed to know how much they are spending on the wedding???

I would do a card minimum, and if you feel inclined, include a small thoughtful gift.