Being treated like a know-it-all and feeling guilty for having a chill baby

I have 2 kids, my eldest is 3 and my youngest is 4 months old.

I have started going to more classes with my baby and have been meeting with and talking to other mums which has been lovely. I didn't do it so much last time because I had pretty bad anxiety and really struggled generally.

As a second-time mum I do feel far more confident and comfortable, but with that being said she is a totally different baby to her brother and I'm still learning new things every day. I do not see myself as a very experienced parent lol

None of the other mums I have been chatting to have any other kids, they're all first time mums, so I try to refrain from talking about my bigger kid mainly because they might not be interested in the toddler stuff yet and I don't want to come across like I'm trying to say I have more on my plate or that I have it harder or something, because having just one baby is hard enough and I don't want them to feel invalidated. Idk if I'm making sense. Anyways.

My baby girl is really chilled out. (Completely different from her brother who was a reflux velcro baby who never slept a full night til he was 2 and only napped on me)

Baby girl sleeps anywhere, feeds and then burps and barely spits up, she had a little bit of silent reflux as a newborn but it doesn't bother her anymore. She's so smiley and just generally easier but I don't know if it just feels easier because i have a bit more confidence in myself.

Whenever the other mums are complaining and venting I struggle to add to the conversation and relate. They've obviously picked up on it and will make comments like "...but not *my baby*, she doesn't do that does she?" Or "you'll not know what I mean" if they're talking about relentless crying or lack of sleep etc.

I do say that my son was very similar and baby girl just has a different nature, I joke she's just a bit lazy like her dad 😅 She sleeps through the night but I haven't told anyone because I can just imagine the eye rolls. Maybe once every few days she will randomly wake up, but I just feed her back to sleep. I just lie and say she does that every night.

They will sometimes ask for advice but it seems like they're trying to get me to admit to some top secret methods I must be using to have a chill baby when in reality that's just how she is. We're very lucky she hasn't had any milk issues or medical issues, I have no idea how she sleeps so well, she's just a high-sleep needs kind of baby so will happily nod off if I get the timing right. I just google most things honestly. If I'm struggling to understand her shifting wake windows as she gets older I just google it and readjust. I've told them that and they say they can't figure it out and their babies only nap for 20 minutes. I say that's also really normal but idk, I just keep quiet now and feel awkward.

in our community

I am not making it up

So my daughter is now two months old and about 14days old, she was five weeks early, so any way I was told by my last HV appointment she should start smiling, I was like ok but in her own time, I know babies will do things in their own time, last week I began to notice her trying to smile and yesterday I leaned over her cot to give her a morning kis and she smiled at me and fell asleep, when she was a awake she smiled at me while I dressed her, this morning she smiled again and tired to get photos, these are her smiling aren't they, I was letting her do in her own time but I didn't know if premature babies have some catching up to do because they are premature but please tell the truth is she starting to smile

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I have a 2 month old and a 3 year old, and I’m considering a double buggy but some people have told me not to bother!
For context, I try and get out and about with both my kids when I’m on my own, my toddler doesn’t really like to walk for extended periods, little legs get tired. And my 2 month old already weighs around 13/14lbs. Him in a baby carrier hurts my back 😅
I was considering a double buggy that my daughter can just get in and out of, we’re also going on holiday in October and I thought a double buggy would be convenient when we are on days out.
Does anyone have any recommendations, suggestions? My budget is £200 max really as I know I won’t use it for that long. Thanks x

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