Ex Fiancé drama
My fiance dumped me and kicked me out of our shared home. He said I wasn’t pulling my weight and he didn’t want me using him for his money, and he deserved a real woman.
Since our break up, I’ve been honestly so much healthier. My mental health is peak, I lost weight and feel great, and even my skin is so much clearer. I feel like the weight and stress has hate been lifted, and I didn’t even realize I was carrying it.
I’ve also been hyper focused on self improvement. I applied to grad school to start in the spring, I accepted the promotion at work he thought was too big of a risk and I’ve been doing really well in the role, and I even bought a house all on my own.
Meanwhile, all he does is go to the bar and stalk my socials. He calls me constantly and begs to know where I am, and then gets mad and accuses me of being weird when social media shows I’m active but I’m not talking to him. He keeps asking who I’m talking to and saying this feels like cheating, because the kids and I are his family, and I’m just cutting him out. He gets really sweet and before I start to even question him he flips to mean so fast I just remember exactly why I’m not going back.
A girl also reacted out to me and sent me some screenshots of shit he was telling her. She said she just thought I should know how my ex was talking about me to strangers (they met at the bar and he knew her for a week, and the shit talk was consistent the whole week). She said he was grimy for that and hoped seeing it would ensure I didn’t look back. It definitely helped.
He just called and is pissed I brought the kids to my parents for dinner and said I could’ve been eating with him as our family. He accused me of having a new man (I don’t) and said that’s why he can’t eat to dinner with us. He keeps saying I just blame him for all our problems and make him the bad guy so I can be guilt free about destroying the only family he’s ever known (he grew up in the system).
Most of the time, I honestly just want to laugh at him. He sounds so ridiculous. And the kids are much happier without him around yelling at everyone 24/7. I told him if he wants to see them, take me to court (I know he wont).
How do you know when the relationship is just done?
I’m a sahm and I’ve only been married for a little over a year but I feel like I’m stuck in my relationship. Before I met my husband I was a single mom working but now I don’t have a car, I don’t work, we have moved states so I’m not near family but his sisters moved close but it’s not the same. I stay home all the time, have 2 kids, third on the way, no friends, no family, no transportation of my own, and now I homeschool my kids even though I’m not happy doing it but because he doesn’t like the idea of them in public school anymore. I’m constantly overwhelmed and just want to cry. If you were to ask me anything about me there wouldn’t be anything to tell…I no longer feel like a person just a mom,just a wife. It’s not like I haven’t told him I don’t want to homeschool…it just turns into a fight, I try to make friends but he works weekends and during the day I’m too busy cleaning cooking and schooling now plus he doesn’t like the idea of me meeting up with people I don’t really know. He doesn’t get that I need something that doesn’t revolve around everyone else I need something even if it’s 30 min coffee with someone but it’s a dead end conversation. I get we can’t afford a car right this second but I never felt so stuck before. I never saw my life being like this and there’s not point in really discussing it cause it’s always a fight. Even when he is home with the kids and me it doesn’t feel like it. He rather just watch tv and play Xbox then go out and do stuff. I love him I do but we just seem so different now. He has turned into someone who just wants to stay home says he “rather be home with family” but idk… I’ve lost my independence I’ve lost me and I just don’t know what to do anymore. I feel like I should just stay quiet and do my best to agree and make everything work. If you read this thanks for taking the time read I just couldn’t hold it in anymore and I unfortunately don’t have anyone I could talk to anymore…
Am I being dramatic
My partner got laid off a few months ago, 2-3 maybe I’m not sure honestly. I started to work over time and make sure to never call out. I do all the cleaning, the laundry, bath time, and feeding (2yo daughter). I know part of it has been my fault. I own that I’m messy and struggle to keep up with a lot of the clutter. I’ve been working really hard to declutter and get rid of junk and to keep cleaning regularly. These are my flaws I own. I know I’m not perfect and I’ve told him I’m trying to be better in where I fall short, but I feel like it’s just me. I don’t feel I’m getting help and I was begging and begging for help recently. I’ve been so overwhelmed that I cry all the time and have constant anxiety. Idk I let so much of it slide bc I know it’s not just he doesn’t want to help it’s that I am in a continuous cycle I need to fix bc even if he wasn’t here I’d be in a similar spot as I have adhd and depression and I avoid stressors which once those chore piles up stress me. Anyway, why I’m posting… I’ve been sharing how I feel, working hard, stressing, I just walked by his computer and he is gambling. Gambling. While he is unemployed. While I am so stressed and working full time and doing everything. It hurt. I know it’s his money but we have a daughter. He won’t get unemployment forever and him using what little he does get to gamble hurts me. He has always hid how much money he has while I am very open about it and I think it has recently changed part of how I view him. Like I need to be cautious. He always says we just get a joint account but I don’t know I feel comfortable doing that if he can’t ever tell me how much money he has and to use it responsibly. And I know again I’m not perfect, I impulse buy things sometimes but it’s usually stuff that gets used in the end, clothes for our daughter, something for the house, a snack or a redbull. Idk…. I just needed to vent partially and see if I’m just dramatic or if I should try to talk to him about it
