Didn’t realise potty training was quite this intense

I’ve started potty training my 22-month-old daughter, and today is day one. She sits on the potty without any problems. I didn’t realise how intense potty training could be! 🥲

Basically, I’m watching her the whole day and taking her to the potty every 20–30 minutes, which is quite hard work!

She’s showing all the signs that she’s ready for potty training, so I’ve decided to stay home for a few days and let her wear just her underwear.

I know it’s only day one, and I’ll keep going like this even if it takes weeks. I’ve already accepted that the first few days will probably be the hardest. My back is hurting, and cleaning poop out of underwear is definitely not a nice experience! 😅

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We just let him go naked, it was easier to clean off of floor in my opinion lol. And that way he could see it come from his body and could make the connection between feeling and action.

Wouldn’t bother with underwear in the house. Easiest way for them to grasp it quickly is being naked on the bottom so they can feel everything fully. Just keep asking if they need a wee etc really frequently x

Support what everyone else has said, go naked first then commando then pants. Much quicker/ easier.

Also for us over promoting didn’t work - the more we asked constantly the more he resisted over time so work out what works for your child x

My 2yo is now potty trained and I just let him go naked for the first week then at the weekend when both me and my partner were home we put him in pants and got the stickers to go in the potty to make it more of a fun experience rather than a forced one. I found this helped massively as he would say train or look for the train whenever he felt the need to go. (We aren’t quite talking enough to refer to the need as a wee) We’re now at the end of it and I braved going into town and to the park on my own with him and he did so well. There’s still some accidents here and there but completely normal. Save yourself the hassle, do no pants then gradually work your way up. It’s very draining but so worth it in the end! Good luck!

Go naked for the first couple days, then underwear, then underwear and clothing on top.

Tomorrow try to go every hour asking her. Keep saying wee wee/poo poo so she knows to repeat it when she needs one. X

I would go naked first if staying home then add underwear once you know baby has linked and understood the sensations in their body meaning toilet.

Also if baby is showing signs but not actually ready it is okay to stop and leave it until later. My 2yo should all the signs of being ready but when it came to it had no interest and actually got angry at it ao I pit it away. At 2.5 years she just decided she was ready.

And thats okay too. So dont worry if it does go pear shaped and you have to take a step back.

It sounds like you have got this and doing all the right things so fingers crossed that it all goes well for you x

in our community

Am I being unreasonable?

We are due our second baby in October and I’ve asked my husband if he could take over the finance planning and meal planning and LO’s birthday and Christmas presents for November and December. He said no, saying am purposely setting him up for failure. He said that apparently am only doing this because i usually start Christmas and birthday shopping during the summer holidays and because I haven’t done that, am setting him up. I was originally planning on starting all the birthday and Christmas shopping during the school holidays but unfortunately my dad passed away unexpectedly at the end of June and it completely threw me off everything and my whole life has been turned upside down. Not once since my dad passed away has my husband offered to take the load off me like meal planning or finance management, he literally came to me 4 days after my dad passed away and was asking me what’s the finances was looking like so he had a few stuff he wanted to order so I had to look into that for him. I’m currently under my prenatal mental health team because since my dad passed, my mental health has declined to the point where my midwife is having weekly conversations with me about potentially going on antidepressants to manage with everything! Since my dad passed I haven’t done anything to get ready for the new baby and I’ve constantly asked my husband for help with sorting baby stuff out and it feels like am in this alone. I’m 31 weeks and nothing has been done so panic is settling in. All am asking is that he takes over those things for November and December so I can just breathe and get a break for a bit from the mental load. I will still be doing the day to day stuff like cleaning and keeping on top of everything but he hears that as me saying I won’t be anything for 2 months and just lazy around… which is far from the truth. My house is always clean, even when am unwell or has been traveling…I always make sure everything is in order and I would still have a newborn and a toddler to entertain and feed but in his mind, I’m gonna so absolutely nothing for 2 months and that am purposely setting him up for failure! I’ve already decided to do the finances stuff til October just so I can make sure all the baby stuff is sorted in time. I feel so overwhelmed at the moment and I just want to be able to shut off from this stuff just a bit so I can breathe and be present for my little ones. His mum has been absolutely amazing at helping me and supporting me through this season but she has her own life and can’t just keep dropping everything to come help me. I feel so lost and guilty for speaking up for myself because of his reaction to me asking him to help me for 2 months with the finances, meal planning, birthday and Christmas stuff!

Disciplining your child

So there’s been a few posts about spanking recently. I DO NOT want this to become a discussion on the merits of spanking nor vilifying people who do spank.

For the record I am against spanking. But then other people are saying that time outs and removal of toys etc are bad too.

How do you discipline your child to encourage a secure attachment, good emotional regulation, and robust nervous system development in your child?

Right to be angry?

I done a KIT day at work yesterday. My step mum had the baby in the morning and my partner in the afternoon. I prepped baby’s bag so that only my step mum needed it and everything at home for my partner. I left two bottles worth of formula powder prepared (in the tommee tippee formula pots) we use this method daily. When I arrived home during conversation and me organising baby’s things it transpires my partner has put both lots of formula into one bottle. I phoned 111 who were happy with baby’s presentation and so far he is fine. I am still angry as it could have been a different situation altogether

Can my 6 month old baby have these Quaker Oats sachets with milk?

My baby turned 6 month old today but can’t sit up independently yet only with support. The health visitor said he can start purées such as porridge oats. Are these Quaker Oats ok?

Feeling fragile - NEED TO VENT.

I've just been visiting my Nan at her care home with my 7 month old. Whenever we go my daughter always gets loads of attention and the residents love her.
Today the visiting daughter of one of the residents made a remark which has upset me and this has surprised me.
My daughter rocks back and forth if you're holding her or she's sitting. This lady goes "oh she's strong, she's crawling too?" and I told her that she isn't crawling yet. Her immediate reply is one of disappointment/concern. She goes on to say "well dont let her skip to walking! My adult daughter skipped crawling and is riddled with anxiety, it's all connected".

I was like what the actual F***.

Firstly please may I see your diploma, lady I've only just met.
Secondly my son didn't crawl, has she now created something new for me to worry about????
Thirdly, I AM CRIPPLED WITH ANXIETY which you'd think she'd be a bit more thoughtful about having a daughter herself who suffers. She didn't think twice about passing down this "helpful" advice.

I have never been knocked by people's comments before but today I am feeling rough. It took all my energy not to cry. Of course I am blaming myself. We don't use containers like bouncers etc but I spent a lot of time walking with her in the pram or she is on my knee but whilst my son does football and swimming so of course naturally I feel like I've f*kd up already 😀 next time I see her I am going to say "think before you comment please".

I know this is a bit dramatic but like I said, I am fragile today. My daughter is currently playing on her tummy and I don't know what else I can do tbh. I thought we were doing the right things 🤷🏻‍♂️

Housework

I feel like I’m struggling so much to do everything! I have a 3 year old and a 9 week old. I have so much on my mind all the time and a lot on my plate and seems like I’m letting things slip due to either being so tired or being busy with my boys. Anyone got any tips to make it a bit easier to keep on top of household jobs?