I’m struggling with myself and my partner, in need of some advice or reassurance

Oh honey, you are not the problem here. Too many women feel this way and have this exact experience. You are trying to hold the world together of multiple people and no one can see how hard it truly is. Your partner needs to step up and support you. It's sad that the example task you have revolved around beer cans. My guess is you were simply asking him to clean up his own mess...

One this is hard time out will be difficult, but more importantly you need to calmly sit down with your husband and explain to him you need help. If you can help it, don't be emotional, don't give attitude. Tell him your overwhelmed and need someone to help you everyday.

I'm also sorry to hear another example with your partner revolved around sex. It's astonishing to think that when women are not stressed and overwhelmed we actually are in the mood more often. Maybe if you told him that fact he would help around the house more as an "incentive" but he shouldn't need that to help you...

I'm so sorry you're going through this and add taking care of a baby to the mix makes it harder. I think most women expect that when having a baby their spouse steps up to the plate. It sounds like he is used to you taking care of everything, which is not fair to you. That said, unfortunately your expectations of him have more likely enabled his behavior... maybe you may have thought by expecting less you would not be disappointed or that he would do it if there was less to do. The lack of fairness in the relationship is what is making you lash out and it makes sense for you to be frustrated doing everything. And the lashing out is not fun for neither you or him so this is probably why you feel he doesn't enjoy your company. Would you say you enjoy his? This sounds like it's been an ongoing issue and resolution probably won't happen quickly but something I'm still learning/ working on, people will treat you the way you treat yourself. Seeing another woman in this situation, you'd probably find it unfair too.

Sorry, character limit.. but yeah you guys will have to have a serious talk about making changes and you will have to voice your needs in the relationship kindly but firmly. Try to come from a place of working as a team (instead of a one man show) and let him know how you've been feeling (use "i" statements instead of blaming by using "you" statements). Hopefully by being vulnerable he'll see his actions affect you and will try more. I hope you start seeing improvement in him soon... that is so difficult. My heart goes out to you, you sound like you've tried to be super mom and wife...that is so much on your plate 🤍

I’m really sorry you are going through this. Postpartum is such a difficult time and then having to deal with a unsupportive partner makes it 1000x worse. My first question is how old is your baby?

Sometimes there are some learning curves when it comes to having your first and it takes a little adjusting on both parts.

Have you guys really had a heart to heart about what you are feeling? Maybe he doesn’t truly know how you are feeling.

I’d also say maybe you guys should try couples counseling because it really isn’t going to get any better unless you both find some middle ground. Maybe that is he helps out more and you let some chores become less frequent. I’m not sure but i think that’d be a good start possibly.

Sending you lots of love! Postpartum is so hard!