How do you feel about your baby being passed around to be held by people who didn't ask?

For example say you didn't like certain family members, you didn't trust their personal hygiene and generally you do not get along, but they are part of your family, do you just grin and bare it and let them hold your baby? Or do you say something?

Because it happened to me today and I didn't want to be awkward or sound horrible, but this man I legit just cannot stand him, and my mum (who I do not get along with either but I already feel like I need to let her hold baby) she passed my baby to him without asking me and it made me feel so uncomfortable. He's just a horrible person, and I don't trust his hygiene, he has long dirty fingernails, he doesn't smell clean, and he gives me the creeps. I just shut down and freaked out internally. I didn't know if it was fine to say something or if it would've been overdrramatic and cause drama for no reason?

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I just make up excuses. Oh I need to change the baby now and grab the baby before anyone has anything to say and walk off. It's so rude though!

Personally I dont go to family events where people i dont like or dont want around my child are going to be. Because it would be my mom handing my baby over to the person I despise and then acting all innocent "what was I supposed to do?"

Urghh..its the most horrible feeling isnt it! I hated it when my partners neice who at the time was about 15 and has a ton of issues would just grab my baby out the pram or my partner would pass our baby to her!
I'd feel sick inside!
My go to would be baby wearing when you know certain family members will be around with grabby hands!

I would literally just say “it’s time for baby to come back to momma” and make it a positive experience for my baby get them to smile and want to come back to me.
If I got any flack from family members I just tell them “sorry, we’re done passing the baby. If you would like we can sit right here and you can still talk to them”

I’m going to a large family event soon. My child will be 10mo so past the age of serious concern. At this event will be a big number of people who have made no effort to meet my son (who live close by and I’ve offered many times). I’ve made it clear to my husband and parents that my son will not be handed round these 10+ people like a pass the parcel.

But I’m feeling somewhat bitter towards these relatives if I’m honest.

I’d probably let them hold baby once. But try to avoid it other times. Usually I’m fine if people just pass the baby around I don’t really care. If someone was gross to me I would let everyone not just them specifically because like hey please wash your hands before washing baby. And if I knew someone smoked or something I wouldn’t let them hold baby if I knew they currently smelled like it. For this situation I’d let them hold baby for like two second then I’d be like I think it’s time for baby to eat even if it’s not and take them and walk away for a bit.

If we're all talking and my mom passes the baby to someone I don't want holding my baby, I will casually walk up to the person and take my baby while still holding the conversation. That's my kid IDC how you feel or think what I or my husband says go.

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