Babysitter

Hi! I’m new to Oklahoma and still needing to find a babysitter for date nights and such! It’s so hard finding someone when I don’t know anyone here, and this momma needs a break🙃 let me know if you know anyone please💖

in our community

Nursery

I feel really conflicted about putting my little one in nursery. I know she’s still so little and I’ve seen so many TikToks saying nursery can be damaging for children, especially when they’re babies, and it’s honestly made me feel really guilty and anxious about it.

The hardest part is that I don’t feel like I actually have a choice. I need to go back to work, so nursery is something we need to do, and that makes me feel awful because I worry that I’m putting my own needs before hers or that she’ll somehow be affected by being away from me at such a young age. I’m more worried about her secure attachment to me and don’t want to damage her mentally from being away from me.

I know logically that nursery isn’t automatically harmful and that lots of children go to nursery and grow up completely happy and healthy, but emotionally it’s hard to switch off that little voice telling me that I’m doing something wrong. I just want to know that she’ll be okay, that she won’t feel like I’ve abandoned her, and that going to nursery won’t damage her emotionally or neurologically.

I think I’m also grieving the fact that I can’t just keep her with me all day. If I had the choice, I’d probably keep her at home for longer, but financially I need to work. I just hope that the time we do have together — mornings, evenings, weekends, bedtime, all the little everyday things — is enough for her to know how loved and safe she is.

I think what I really need is reassurance that choosing nursery because I have to return to work doesn’t make me a bad mum or mean I’m harming my baby.

Baby rejecting me?

Hey mamas please help me with any info you might have! My 14 month old has recently started rejecting me heavily. He’s still breastfed and I’m his primary care giver. Whenever dad is home he’s all about daddy. It’s been like that for a while, but lately it’s gotten a lot worse. He’s started being mean to me when he’s home, pushing me away, going to him for everything. It breaks my heart. Has anyone experienced this or have any advice? Thanks!

Can I have a rant please?

Basically I've been with my partner for 16 years, we've got a 6 year old and now have 4 month old twins. When my oldest was born he hardly helped out at all, only when he started getting older and now its been the same with my twins. I honestly thought it would be different this time around, but I've been doing everything with my twins, all the feeds, nappy changes, taking them out and going to baby classes things like that. I ask him for help but he will make us excuses like ' they will fall asleep on me' ' my back hurts' or he will be in the middle of playing his game and will say ' i can't pause it'

We recently had an argument and haven't spoken properly since which is making things alot worse.
Do I try and salvage this? Or leave?

How would you feel?

our 3 old was crying in hysterics at night time, I gave him calpol I tried to soothe him I stood up to comfort him and laid down and tried to make him sleep, this was going on for hours it seemed but must have been 20/30 minutes but nothing I was doing was working, he wanted his dad. When my husband walked in after hearing him scream at that point I was laying down with our son and had given up I was hoping he’d just cry to sleep even when I was patting him he hated it.

My husband came in and was furious he blurted out and screamed at me that I can’t do anything and that he regrets marrying me, he regrets having children (we’ve been married 8 years and 2 kids) I’ve always had doubts about his sincerity because I feel insecure and he doesn’t help that. And this was like a knife to my heart. Or the final nail to the coffin.

We haven’t spoken since Friday night, his mum has been calling me because he went round to hers saying he wants me to leave and to kick me out, to call my parents to pick me and the kids up. She came over today to “sort it”. She sat us down and made us say what is wrong and he just said he said what he wanted to say in the car to her, I said well I wasn’t in the car to know what you said?! He then said that I am mean to the kids, I speak harshly to them and I’m annoyed with them and that he doesn’t like that I don’t always cook or clean 🙃

Ive also been to the doctors recently I have extremely low iron and vitamin d so my motivation is lost and my body is always tired.

Anyways she mediated this “meeting” and I actually stopped giving too much info because I thought wtf am i doing and just agreed to her big lectures on husband / wife compromises. My husand agreed that looking after kids is hard and that he won’t be so harsh with me. He left after that to go to work and picked up the lunch box I made for him. He turned and tried to smile and give me a gesture that we normally do like everything is okay now.

I just don’t know how to feel about this. Shall I just carry on as normal and forget this happened? Or shall i hold the grudge? Shall I leave ? Shall I see this as he regrets what he said on Friday and thought it was a big deal that’s why he had to get his mum involved to save the day?

Moms who wfh or in General full time - Does your spouse help around the house

No matter how much I clean, it is never clean or good enough. His reasoning for not helping is bc he pays all the bills and works 40+ hours outside. We have two kiddos, and they do their part in helping me

Does anyone's LO go to FS1 (nursery in a school)

Do you send them on just the days you need childcare or full time every day??