in

Marriage Help

Advice

My husband and I have been married for six months, and recently we’ve been having some issues with intimacy.
We’re both parents with children from previous relationships, so naturally, we’re often exhausted by the end of the day. I completely understand that, and I try to make an effort to still be present and connected during the downtime we do have.

Lately, though, I’ve started to feel like I’m the driving force behind sex and physical affection. It’s getting to the point where I feel responsible for making it happen, and that’s starting to affect how I feel about intimacy between us.
Unless I’m initiating things or making an effort to accommodate a new kink or something he’s interested in, I don’t really feel much enthusiasm coming from his side. I also feel like there’s very little aftercare afterwards, and on a lot of nights I find myself feeling like I’m competing with his phone for his attention.

I don’t want intimacy to feel like something I have to organise, initiate or work towards on my own. I want to feel desired, connected to my husband, and like physical affection is something we both genuinely want and make an effort towards.

Has anyone been through something similar, and if so, how did you get past it?