Partner resentment
I think my partner is starting to resent me or at the very least he is distancing himself from our kid and I.
Our daughter has her own opinions now as a toddler and has her preferences (mostly involving me) and I think my partner is resenting me for it.
I’m a stay at home mum and he works retail so there’s some days he’s away before she’s awake and home for when dinners served and she never knows when that will happen so clearly she sticks me with me. She loves him, misses him and seeks him out but won’t allow him to change her nappy, take her for a bath, brush her hair, put her jacket or shoes on, etc etc.
Since this has started he’s been seeking out other things to keep him out the house, like going out to play football randomly with some guy he met through work (a customer) or wanting to go drinking for his friends birthday that I was invited to aswell but he made the case of our daughter and dog need me not him. He’s going out again with his uncle and has been asked to stay out the whole weekend. The takes on extra hours at work and then complains to me constantly about said work and colleagues. Or he complains work is getting in the way of football but then turns around and says he can’t do football because I don’t like looking after our daughter from 6am to 9pm alone.
And to top it off I have one bag to carry my cats in to the vet appointments and they like to have set days for vaccinations so both cats have to go the same day, he works 2hrs after the first appointment so promised me he would take one and I’ll take the other but now he’s telling me he can’t because he’s agreed to work earlier because the manager went on holiday.
I might be making it up in my head, I get that. I just don’t think I am. He never once considered doing this when our daughter clung to him like he hung the moon, now she doesn’t he’s short with her and I or just doesn’t show up and constantly “forgets” things we’ve said or done.
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Honestly I feel the same sometimes, my little girl is currently 7 months old, when she was new born my partner was amazing in supporting us both, and still is, though when he returned to work as he is what you could say the “bread winner” things changed, and we’d both agreed id be a stay at home mum, though I’m in a similar situation, my partner is out the house for work before she wakes and is only home for a few hours before she goes to bed, he does spend some time with her but of course she does mostly “prefer” me over him, when it comes to settling etc just due to the fact that I’m home with her, it’s easier for me to do it, He also has a job that he does on weekends too and usually when he comes home from work he will occupy himself with something he enjoys doing & sometimes I feel like he doesn’t want to take over with bath time/ playtime etc because he feels like our little girl would prefer it to be with her. It has gotten us both down and over the last couple of months-
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A child someone else birthed 37 years ago and now I am being forced to raise
It finally happened, my husband turned into my third child after my second son was born. There’s no other way to go about it.
If one bit of admiration was left, it is definitely out of the window now. I can’t even think about being intimate with him again without getting nauseous.
I’m 3 months PP, and this manchild has been making my life so much harder. He got 12 weeks paternity leave to catch-up on sleep, while I struggled with the C-section recovery and newborn, and he half ass-d with the toddler. Mind you, with the toddler in daycare FT, this man would sleep whenever newborn and I would sleep, and proceed to sleep in another room through the night so we wouldn’t keep waking him up.
Like, what?! In what world is he living on? Am I missing something?
Anyone else having this experience? I just feel like I need to drop him, because aside from financial, the support just isn’t there.
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Extreme Boy Moms
This might be an unpopular opinion to post on the Boy Moms group. I think it’s inappropriate to rearrange one’s identity around being a boy mom.
For example, my MIL came to me when I was 24 hours postpartum. She said “you are so lucky to be a boy mom. Boys are so much closer to their mothers!” I understand the sentiment, but this should not be shared out loud. Especially when this woman has a daughter. However, she is completely enmeshed with my husband. She keeps on wearing my husband’s clothings from 10 yrs ago(college years) when she comes to visit. When my husband confronts her and ask her to stop wearing clothes he abandoned at the family home. She says “but it’s warm!” To me, when boy moms take it to the extreme like my MIL. I just want to call out the emotional incest bs I see. 🤮
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Am I wrong to feel uneasy?
My son goes to nursery two days a week. Every child is assigned an adult/ member of staff. My son is two and a half and has had this lady for nearly a year, she tells him she loves him every time I pick him up and I overheard her getting him to say I love you to the moon and back to her.
Am I in the minority thinking this is a bit much?
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Going off my partner
Myself and my partner have been together just over 6 years and we have 3 kids together but we have known each other for a lot longer. Just lately everything he says and does just annoys me! Like I can tell the kids off about something and then he could tell them the next day and I’m just instantly irritated. We have had a lot of different issues over the years but I really do feel like I’m massively going off him! Anyone been through the same? Anyone got any advice 🤷🏻♀️
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Would you be offended if somebody tells you that your child is “stupid”
So they tell you online that nobody wants to raise a “stupid child”
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Please help 🙏
I’m in a dilemma, and am unsure what to do. So my partner and i have a 2 year old together, we both pretty much live at my mums place and we give her money towards rent each month as she is struggling, my partner stays less as sometimes he’ll stay at home due to work, (his family home is 1.5hr from mine) ever since I’ve had my son I wanted to keep him at home until he was 3 and just find a job in the evenings, I’ve got this job currently it’s school cleaning and I do enjoy it, it’s decent pay and means I get a bit of money to treat myself at the end of the month, I do get Universal Credit and get £150 from my partner each month but never have enough to get myself clothes and that. My partner is a labourer and has started moving around the country for work, so my mum has been coming home after 9hours of work a day in the construction industry and she’s tired, she cares for my son while I’m working as my partner is either still working at that time or at his, he also goes to watch his team at football twice a week which is also near him, I’ve been saying I don’t want my mum to do this forever as I can see she’s so tired from doing all this, and my MIL says I’ll have to find a different job in the mornings and put my son into nursery, I wouldn’t want him going full time so it would have to be part time, 3 days a week, we’re going to be moving out soon in the next 2 years and barely have any savings, My partner says we both need to be saving I don’t earn enough currently but my partner earns just under £3000 a month and he’s only 25, but the fact I’m having to leave my job (this also happened with my last evening job before this one) makes me upset I’m not asking him to leave his job I’m just so tired and exhausted, and he doesn’t want to hear it, I don’t have any friends or social life, I’m really struggling and work and being with my son is the only thing going for me and I now have to give up work, and try and find a job that fits around my partner. 😞
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