Partner going out more
Me and my partner have a 2.5 year old daughter and I am 23 weeks pregnant. We have only been together 3.5 years so wasn’t together long before I got pregnant. When we met neither of us went on nights out, my partner would go out maybe every 2 months to catch up with friends. When I got pregnant my hormones and anxiety was all over the place, I was scared and wasn’t sure about the relationship so I pushed him away and he went out loads. We went through a make or break situation and he ended up moving in and things got so much better. I think I needed some reassurance and commitment. So now I am pregnant again and I have had the opposite experience I am tired and sore due to previous health problems and need his help more and just want him around in his free time. He has been going out more whilst I’ve been pregnant but not just the normal nights out he has been going further and staying in a hotel so I am left solo parenting. I am mainly a sahm I work 10 hours a week in the evening so I do contribute but he says this is what I chose so I can’t moan about being with my daughter all the time and everything being on me.
I am feeling very vulnerable and like he is pushing me away this time, he not the cheating type so I don’t worry about that, he would never want to do anything to jeopardise his relationship with me so he isn’t with us full time but I can’t help feeling annoyed/worried about the increase in nights out drinking till all hours and staying away from home. I don’t want our children growing up around excessive alcohol like we both did, we both agreed we wanted to focus on them and make our free time their childhood but he is not doing that most of the time. Am I overreacting?
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So much about this irritates me.
Firstly, he gets to clock out from his day job for 10+ hours a day and weekends. You don't.
Secondly, next time he moans about his job tell him to stop because he chose it.
Thirdly, he chose to be a father twice. Act like one.
I wouldn't accept this type of behaviour from my father, and I certainly wouldn't accept this type of behaviour from my husband.
F
You’re not overreacting, a woman is in her most vulnerable state when she’s pregnant. In my opinion he shouldn’t be drinking at all or going out while you’re pregnant and even if you wanted to be a SAHM doesn’t give him a right to leave you to do 90% of the work when he is off from work he’s supposed to do half. My husband hasn’t drank one sip of alcohol since I got pregnant and now that I’m breastfeeding he is still not having any until I’m done in a year from now. He’s supposed to be your partner and your life companion there’s no friends or family or anyone who should matter more than you. I would try to talk to him again about how it makes you feel.
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Partner going out more
Me and my partner have a 2.5 year old daughter and I am 23 weeks pregnant. We have only been together 3.5 years so wasn’t together long before I got pregnant. When we met neither of us went on nights out, my partner would go out maybe every 2 months to catch up with friends. When I got pregnant my hormones and anxiety was all over the place, I was scared and wasn’t sure about the relationship so I pushed him away and he went out loads. We went through a make or break situation and he ended up moving in and things got so much better. I think I needed some reassurance and commitment. So now I am pregnant again and I have had the opposite experience I am tired and sore due to previous health problems and need his help more and just want him around in his free time. He has been going out more whilst I’ve been pregnant but not just the normal nights out he has been going further and staying in a hotel so I am left solo parenting. I am mainly a sahm I work 10 hours a week in the evening so I do contribute but he says this is what I chose so I can’t moan about being with my daughter all the time and everything being on me.
I am feeling very vulnerable and like he is pushing me away this time, he not the cheating type so I don’t worry about that, he would never want to do anything to jeopardise his relationship with me so he isn’t with us full time but I can’t help feeling annoyed/worried about the increase in nights out drinking till all hours and staying away from home. I don’t want our children growing up around excessive alcohol like we both did, we both agreed we wanted to focus on them and make our free time their childhood but he is not doing that most of the time. Am I overreacting?
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