I am engaged to a truck driver that’s home every night but refuses to help with our 2 week old during the week and I’m starting to feel like a single parent. I understand he needs his sleep because he doesn’t need to fall asleep behind the wheel but this morning he woke up mad because baby girl was fussing and instead of him helping me he left for work an hour early. I know I’m in postpartum but it makes me wanna leave and maybe go two hours to my step mom so i can get some sleep i know she would help
Read more on PeanutThe views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.
Learn more about our guidelines.
I’m so sorry you’re experiencing this but I just want to say you are completely justified in how you are feeling. You have gone through a major life change, you are mentally and physically exhausted. He should be helping with baby girl and honestly, taking care of you.
You need to sit down and explain how his actions are making you feel because it can’t continue, it’s not fair on you.

A c-section is a major surgery, he should be helping you as much as he can outside of work. I think you should go visit your stepmom so you can rest and recover.

Yes, that is the solution. Everyone is exhausted the first year. It’s more finding the pockets of time to sleep. That’s really all it is. I’m sure he would love to help but he can’t wake the f up. He’s exhausted! You’re exhausted! Everyone is exhausted! Welcome to mother hood :))

Red Flags
He should be a supportive partner
Unless he is either working or sleeping he can spare some time to watch his own child so you can rest. There is no way every minute in 24 hours he is either sleeping or working.
Choosing to leave an hour early instead of supporting you is insane.
It is also very concerning that he thinks this is your job. It is also concerning he trusts the care of you and the baby with his mother who has a history of drug use.
There is no excuse for him to not be able to help because he is too tired. That isn't being a good partner.
Go to your step mom and get some rest, it sounds like you will get more support there.

He should be helping!! I had a c section and my husband did all the lifting of our baby, even changes most of the nappies etc for the first few weeks so I could recover. Yes you will take the majority of the workload due to being at home but when he’s home he should be pulling his finger out and looking after his wife and newborn!
Im disgusted, it was around 4 am my partner was touching me up around the hips and butt,I was half asleep could feel what he was doing i said no, whilst being jalf asleep clearly he didnt hear or chose not to and carried on i pushed his hands away he carried on,I looked at the time 4am,I said no i have work later today and im literally half asleep he then got the message,i literally dont want to go down stairs and face him what he did was not respect my answers at all he carried on i said no like three times and he carried on.
WWYD?
9
I’ve been with my husband just over 4 years and we had our 1st wedding anniversary earlier this year. We also have a 1 year old. Our relationship over the last year has been really rocky. We’ve had horrendous arguments when we’ve never argued before, things have been said and there’s been many a time I’ve thought that we were done. While we have been slightly better over the last so many months, when we argue we argue. I feel like we have completely lost our spark. We don’t ever really cuddle as I don’t now like it as much as I used too, hardly say I love you and don’t ever really laugh and joke about when we used to be like best friends. The thing is I don’t see any of this changing especially as our 2nd is due next year. Obviously I love him but I don’t feel the way I did towards him in our early days. We have limited childcare so don’t ever get time just us and the 2 opportunities we did have the nursery sent our son home early so we had to cancel plans. I don’t know if we’ve just naturally drifted apart from each other or if this is just because of having children
2
12
My baby is just over 12 weeks now , I feed him and he is still hungry , we are currently going through with the doctors about severe reflux. Has anyone given there baby , baby rice earlier than 4 months ?
21
So my partner has acted weird the last 2 days. Yesterday he was meant to tell me if I needed to collect our son from school. He never got in touch so I rang him and it was weird. He didn't acknowledge he could have rung, explain why he didn't, act like he forgot or apologise. I said I would see him when he got home and he responded "you too". He immediately texted that he loved me and I told him the call was weird and he apologised and said there where people in the room. I rang at 2:15 and he finishes at 2. I knew he may have to stay back.
Today he got home a tad late and brought snacks which I had asked him too and then we had a few minutes of conversation and then he was in the bedroom whike I did house work. He then had a shower and went back to the bedroom. He has been home since just after 3 and is now asleep. He isn't talkative and I can tell something is off. He said work was busy and we had a bad night last night sleep wise but he has been chronically exhausted for a long time and functions on little sleep. He has a routine when he gets home that includes spending most of the night at his hobby desk with his tablet and gaming console. He has never acted like this. I mean yeah he has had a shower first or napped but 3.5 hours in the bedroom/shower and not his desk, nope.
I asked if he was ok and he said he eas just tired. I said he seems off and he didn't really acknowledge me.
8
My husband left me for another woman 10 years younger than me two months ago. We have three little ones together, ages 9, 6, and 2, and I’m currently pregnant with our fourth child.
When he first left, he wanted us to continue living in the marital home and coparent. His idea was to turn the nursery into his room, even though he said he would barely be home. I couldn’t imagine living under the same roof with someone who had chosen to leave our marriage, watching him get ready to go out was killing me, so I decided to get my own place and start over.
For a while, I thought I was doing okay. I was managing the kids, the house, and the reality of everything that had happened. But about three days ago, I started experiencing sharp pains and back pain, and suddenly, it all hit me. I’m about to have a newborn and three other little children to care for, and I’m going to be doing it all on my own.
Since then, my husband has practically disappeared. He barely calls the kids and has only seen them twice. They ask me all the time where their dad is, and I find myself making excuses to protect their little hearts. I tell them he’s working or try to give them an answer that won’t hurt them, even though I’m struggling to understand his absence myself.
I’m overstimulated, exhausted, and already sleep-deprived because my two-year-old is going through a sleep regression. I’m trying to hold everything together, but honestly, I’m terrified of what life will look like when the baby gets here. The thought of waking up every three hours to feed a newborn while taking care of three other children, without a consistent partner to lean on, feels overwhelming.
I think what hurts the most is that after almost a decade together, I never imagined he could just disappear like this. I never thought I would be preparing to welcome our baby into the world while simultaneously trying to explain to our children why their father is barely around.
I didn’t just lose my husband. I lost the future I thought we were building together, the family dynamic I believed our children would grow up with, and the person I thought I could count on when life got hard.
I’m trying to be strong for my babies because they still need me, regardless of how broken or overwhelmed I feel inside. But the truth is, I’m scared. I’m tired. And some days, I don’t know how I’m going to do it all.
After almost ten years with someone, you never imagine having to face something like this. I guess you really never know someone as well as you think you do. 💔
6
8
I am engaged to a truck driver that’s home every night but refuses to help with our 2 week old during the week and I’m starting to feel like a single parent. I understand he needs his sleep because he doesn’t need to fall asleep behind the wheel but this morning he woke up mad because baby girl was fussing and instead of him helping me he left for work an hour early. I know I’m in postpartum but it makes me wanna leave and maybe go two hours to my step mom so i can get some sleep i know she would help
7