I need advice

If your husband had spent $$$ on random gambling apps, lost $$$ before, promised to you he would never do it again, money has been super tight because you are currently moving houses, and you literally were skipping meals to make sure the kids ate, cut your hair to use less shampoo and conditioner, started using only $2 shampoo and conditioner, was watering down your leave in conditioner, stopped buying makeup, skin care, clothes, didn’t even go to a salon for a year, stopped buying anything for yourself, even have been wearing the same one pair of sandals for a year…..and you see this show up in the transactions of yours and his bank account while he’s at work what would be going through your head???? Because I’m absolutely livid……

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Id kill him. That being said gambling is a horrible addiction and he probably genuinely believes he might make some money for you guys. The industry preys on people who are struggling. Maybe its time to give him an ultimatum about getting help (gambling anonymous is free and everywhere) or leaving. I hope things get easier for you both, it must be so stressful and youre sacrificing a lot. Xx

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As a former gambler, if he knew money was tight.. he might have been trying to make money to make life easier. Its a vicious cycle, you win some you lose some. And when you have an illness like gambling addiction, and you are also feeling helpless about providing for your family... you would do anything to help support the family - even if it means sacrificing money to win nothing.

Yes it's horrible, but it is an illness. It is an addiction that needs working through with support. He might have promised but when money is so hard to come by, he broke it to support the family. He had good intentions.

Addiction is hard to work on when alone. Support is necessary and help is needed.

It might be worth speaking to a financial advisor if money is this tight. You could be spending where you dont need to, find cheaper rates elsewhere and so on.

I spoke with one and now my baby has more money than me but we also aren't poor or broke. I also have savings i canr touch so even if I am tempted , the funds are simply...

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... not there.

You can also set up on your bank to block gambling sites. So even if you tried it would be declined to help the addiction.

I hope this helps x

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Personally id be absolutely livid aswell but unfortunately he's an addict an they are the most selfish people going. Until he seeks professional help it will continue. If i was you id be cutting financial ties if possible such as your own bank account ect. Id also be questioning if this is the life you want to carry on living. Unfortunately you may have to separate to gain a better quality of life for you and the children.

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Gamblers Anonymous asap

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id snap

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Betrayal

I have been married over 7 years, been with my partner over 10 years. We have everything, a beautiful daughter who is 8 months old, two dogs, big house, land. We get along great, don’t fight. We are a great team.

When I was 3 months post partum his brother and sister in law hadn’t come to visit our daughter. I thought it was odd since we would them and their two kids monthly. I try very hard with them to be around and apart of their lives. However they stopped talking to us. I reached out to her a few times but finally she told me the reason.

She said my husband 10 years ago would send her photos of himself. Like ask her if she were curious of him. She told him yes, she was.Tell her nice butt, send inappropriate messages- you get it. Ok so this happen a couple times a year…for FIVE years. Like he needed a boost of validation or felt insecure so he sent something to her? And she would give it to him. I had no idea. I did get weird vibes around her. I thought she laughed way to hard at him, looked at him too long ya know? Anyways I’m so upset she told and he didn’t…he said he was so embarrassed it even happened and he tried to tell me but would get scared. He came from an abusive family/lot of insecurity problems. I honestly don’t think she is very attractive not trying to be mean I am just not jealous of her…like yes I am post partum and not the most physically attractive I have ever been I just have more to offer than that, I feel very good about myself. He said he wasn’t physically attracted to her, he just got attention from her.

Anyways I love my husband. We are no longer going to see his brother and sister in law, not very difficult since his brother doesn’t have anything to do with the rest of my husbands family. Just wondering your thoughts. Is this forgivable? Obviously I am hurt. My daughter at the time I found out was 3 months old I had way too much on my plate to deal with him crying at me about how he is so sorry and didn’t realize it was cheating…he hadn’t done this in over five years. He started seeing a therapist to work on himself. He listens to pod casts and self help audio books. I love him and thought we had such a great thing. I don’t want to give that all up but wtf that was his brothers wife. It’s like he pretended she was someone else. Cuz he wouldn’t act weird around her. I never got that vibe from him.

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4

In laws, what would you do

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8

I need advice

If your husband had spent $$$ on random gambling apps, lost $$$ before, promised to you he would never do it again, money has been super tight because you are currently moving houses, and you literally were skipping meals to make sure the kids ate, cut your hair to use less shampoo and conditioner, started using only $2 shampoo and conditioner, was watering down your leave in conditioner, stopped buying makeup, skin care, clothes, didn’t even go to a salon for a year, stopped buying anything for yourself, even have been wearing the same one pair of sandals for a year…..and you see this show up in the transactions of yours and his bank account while he’s at work what would be going through your head???? Because I’m absolutely livid……

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My toddler hates getting dressed or changing their nappy

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3

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