Mother in law rant

Not kissing, but I’m having similar issues with my mother in law. She’s adamant my wee girl will be learning Italian (🤷🏼‍♀️) when she’s older cause she wants her to. She’s convinced she loves Disney films (she’s 11 weeks old) and when I made a comment about her not gonna be watching tv all day everyday as she gets older, she said ‘that won’t be happening in this house, she can watch whatever she likes’ and now today I got a text to tell me she’s signed herself and my baby up to a bannatynes membership and telling me she’ll be taking my baby swimming… basically she’s treating my child as her 3rd child and trying to wind me up.

I personally get why people want to be kissing babies all over, I would personally be kissing all the babies if I knew them and weren't creepy haha. I kiss my son so much!! Now, I don't like just any person doing it and won't let people who aren't close to me kiss my son. However, I cannot imagine as a kid having my grandma not kissing me nor have I felt the need to tell my mum or my partner's mum not to kiss their grandchild. On the mouth and hands I have openly asked people not to (for germs), but in the cheeks or forehead I honestly don't see the harm. Perhaps because I'm Spanish and we're very touchy feely. I don't know, you have a right to set your boundaries and they should respect them, but I also get why a grandma would question why she couldn't kiss her grandchild and would find it hard not to.

I’m not with my child’s father and he has made his family aware about the no kissing rule, i can feel a rage building inside of me when I see her because she just doesn’t respect my wishes and plays it off all jokey when it’s not, I worry when my baby spends time with his dad now because I know she will be there and I feel like I can’t trust her or his family to respect my wishes

It’s not that she won’t ever be able to but I just don’t like the idea of it, and i think it’s so disrespectful that I’ve put a boundary in place and she will sneakily go behind my back and disrespect me when I’m not looking, like I was literally holding my son and she came up behind me and kissed him? It’s things like that and it really bothers me, I feel like if she had of respected my wishes in the first place I probably would feel a little bit different about it now he’s older but when she’s doing it in plain sight when people aren’t looking I feel like it’s not okay

Yes, I understand that her sort of provoking you IS a problem. It was more the kissing thing that I personally don't relate to when it comes to close people, like family and friends. But that is personal. I hate people kissing kids in their mouth, I find it odd, but loads of other people won't and that's perfectly OK. We all have our boundaries. And if when my son grows up he decides he doesn't like kissing, then I will make sure I'll help him hold that boundary.

Dont leave the baby alone with him if you feel that he doesn’t have childs best interest and allows he to be kissed by others. I just f get it whats wrong with people… why they feel the need to cross the boundaries or tell us how to raise our kids… like gtf honestly… triggers me so much.

Put your foot down. 100% no face kissing - I don’t even kiss my own 5mth old on the lips. Germs, coldsores, colds, just ewwwwww!

what you have just said about not wanting to leave your baby with the father because you don’t trust her around him I am literally the same!!!!!!

It frustrates me because I deliberately tell the mother what he needs, I let her feed him and i said “ please can you burp him too in between otherwise hell get really bad tummy bubbles and ends up grunting all night because of it” She didn’t do what I said and he ended up throwing it all up and being all squirmy and grunty. I asked her how much he had drunk from the bottle at one point too and she just kept feeding and feeding without burping and just said “no I feed him until he finishes”. Like fair enough but he’ll throw up everywhere if not! Like I’ve asked you a question and youre blatantly doing your own way?????? Or even one time he was spitting his dummy out (my son is 8 weeks) and she said “oh put some sugar and water in” I do not want to do that!!!!! It might have worked for her but at 8 weeks I’d rather not be doing that!

So now I’m stuck as to when to let my baby go to theirs, my baby dads really good, I do feel for him at times because he doesn’t really get much time with him because his mum just literally hogs him…. I wanted to try breastfeed my baby as much as possible but it’s abit hard when he’s going to be switching between homes so I’ve just bought them combination feeding formula. But I’m still in the mix of when to let him go to theirs for just a couple of hours without me :/

What’s wrong with people! 🤦‍♀️ my cousin put his finger in my babies mouth to chew on when I wasn’t watching and then a friend did the same! Cousin had just been holding his dog and friend had just got off the tube 😭 i told her not to and she asked me why!I then told friend not to kiss him as she was about to and she again asked me why! I explained but I shouldn’t have to. Just accept mums rules and don’t put your fingers in my babies mouth ?!? Sorry pissed me off so much 😅

honestly it’s the most annoying thing!! I am giving my baby expressed breast milk, he goes to his dads once a week on a Sunday for 2 hours and I give him 1 bottle of milk, I hate being away from him but don’t not breastfeed your baby just to please them!! My baby’s father was more than accepting about the fact he’s breast fed and can’t be away from me for too long, do not ever compromise when it comes to your baby, if he wants to have him longer I will sit with him for a while when I go to pick him up, in terms of the mother in laws I can’t help but actually hate her, she tries to put me down all the time but plays it off as being a little joke having digs here and there, she tried to get me to formula feed my boy so she could start having him for the day but I told her straight, when he was 1 week old she was asking me when she gets to have him overnight!! She is constantly over stepping the boundaries and I really don’t know how much longer I can keep my cool🙄

No way asking to stay over from one week😱I absolutely hate pumping I used to be okay with it but my milk supply was just all over the place, so feeding him on demand was literally the best thing ever. But I completely understand you, my bd mother kissed him from the first day she met him. I made one of those little “rules when visiting” posts but never posted it in the end, the first thing that was on there was no kissing the baby. I regret not posting it now because she’s just kissed him so many times, but I told her and her own son said “no kissing” and she was like “nonsense a little kiss won’t hurt” which it might not but just out of respect you wouldn’t do it if the parents are asking you not to💀
Honestly I don’t even think my boys dad has been able to properly bond with him yet because of his mum😵‍💫She just wants to do everything herself and barely lets him do anything.But she’s got to be there at all times because it’s putting that boundary between me and him😬 so god forbid when

-when he’s allowed to theirs without me😭😭😭 why do they be treating your child as if it’s their baby. Don’t get me started on that she calls my son “My Frankie”

I’m so glad I’m not the only one😂 feel like I’m going delusional sometimes when it comes to her, there’s so many things she does that are bang out of order and I constantly regret not putting her back in her place sometimes but I really try and keep the peace for mine and his sake, I’ve said to her before the most important thing is that my son sees that even though his parents aren’t together they can still get along and do things as a family, I don’t want him to grow up thinking it’s normal for parents to be horrible to eachother and not speak of you know what I mean? Have you tried having the conversation with him? Maybe get him to meet you in a neutral space together not just at his or your home, it might help build a better relationship with him and you could be more comfortable to bring up some of the issues that your having

He would absolutely never, tbf I think he still has a grudge against me, me and him split when we found out I was pregnant and hasn’t given me exactly the nicest treatment through pregnancy. Though since frankies birth he’s been okay but part of me thinks it’s because I told him if he can show me he’d a responsible parent I’ll put him on the birth certificate.
So we had some serious conversations about our boundaries and he had to mention he’s got a new girlfriend.. of course.. so I think it’s more of the fact he doesn’t want to be seen in public with me because it would look weird. In his eyes anyway. So the only neutral place is our homes 😭 but I think we both get the gist with his mum because sometimes she says things and he gives me “the look” where we both don’t agree. The side eye look!!!!

The look where you know your baby’s grandparent is being obsessive 🤣😭

Ah man that sucks!! I wouldn’t know how that feels but I can’t imagine it being very nice, sounds like he needs to suck it up and tell his mom to back away a bit, whenever my baby dad comes over my parents stay out of the way to give him time to bond with his son, surely she must realise she is being over bearing?? I just don’t know what goes through there head to think they have a right to parent someone else’s baby😂 honestly baffles me

My dads response was “well it’s not like I’m dirty or have anything is it?!” 🙄🙄 a few days later both he and his partner told us they had bronchitis. I was raging 🫠