Anyone get anxious when both sets of grandparents are together?

We live close to my parents as well as my in-laws. Every time there’s an event that they’re both invited to, I get super anxious. My parents are much shyer but much more able bodied than my in-laws so they’ll likely gravitate towards being active and playing around with my son. Whereas my in-laws are annoyingly competitive and try to have my son come and be with them.

I end up stressing the entire event trying to figure out how to balance out how my son interacts with both sets of grandparents so no one set feels like they’re being overlooked. I can never have fun…

For example, today is my father in laws 70th birthday and my parents are invited as well as like 50 of my in-laws friends. I worry about how my parents will fit in at the event and feel like I’ll need to go above and beyond to make sure they’re getting time with my son.

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I feel you! I literally hate it when my mil is at an event with my mum as they don’t get on at all!
I have no words of advice just here if you ever want to chat! X

I wouldn’t focus on what happens between your parents and in laws during gatherings, why do that anyway ? You’re there to enjoy yourself too, right ? So, organise separate outings with each set of grandparents ..so that each gets to be the best grandparent at one given time.
You cannot control how your parents are, or your in laws..so why continue feeling anxious for an entire eternity when you know that won’t make any difference in anyone’s life? Enjoy being a new mother by just …being a new mother and let everyone else be who they are.

Good luck, I’m sure you’ll start having some long awaited fun too..!

My mom and my dad do not get along with my mil. When they are together we are all on egg shells bc my mom will not hesitate to stand up for me or put her in her place when she says shit about me thinking no one is around. We plan everything separately for the most part. I have had to set heavy boundaries with my mil bc she is always starting things (she is old and has been known to do this for years and I'm the only one who will stand up to her until recently) my only advice is to stand back and watch and keep quiet with ur family tbh. This is what I've had to do recently bc if I open my mouth I'm automatically the bad guy and the drama starter so I stopped participating in family functions unless I had to for my husband or my son (15 mnths)

I’d just have fun and leave them to it! If my parents and in-laws are competitive about getting attention from a child I’d play no part in it and try to ignore it. You shouldn’t be stressing about stuff like this, enjoy yourself!

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