Am I overreacting?

Maybe I’m overreacting. But today I found out my mom went behind my back to talk to my kids teacher. It was over the dumbest thing. My kid is in kindergarten and told me that she doesn’t have enough time to eat her lunch because she wants to go play.
I told my mom yesterday but I had already addressed it with my daughter. My mom decides that she’s going to talk to the teacher about it and doesn’t tell me until after it’s already done. When I went to pick up my daughter she tells me she ate all of her food. My mom watches my son so when we head to her house. My mom starts to tell me she just had to talk to the teacher about my daughter eating her food because I wasn’t going to.
I don’t know if I overreacted but I got upset. She constantly undermines me as a parent and tries to take over everything concerning my daughter. I asked her what she told the teacher and she got offended I got annoyed and wouldn’t tell me. Am I the asshole? Did I overreact?
There’s a lot she does that annoys me and it’s starting to get to me. I’ve talked to her numerous times but nothing ever changes. Another example is if my daughter gets hurts and runs to me. My mom will tell my daughter to go to her and act hurt if my daughter doesn’t.

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You need to set boundaries, that was out of line of your moms part. She needs to come to you first and not act like the mom of your daughter. Be stern and call her out or let her know she’ll have less time w your daughter if she can’t respect that.

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Hell no! How dare she. You are her parent, and unless you give her permission to she should never feel comfortable to do that. Whether you decide to speak to the teacher or not is up to you. Her reaction is also quite upsetting. As states above, you need to set some firm boundaries with her. You are the mother and if she can't respect that you may need to think about altering how the relationship with her and your daughter works. It sounds like a lot of manipulation that she shouldn't be invving your daughter in. Especially expecting her to want anyone but her mother when she is hurt. I'm so sorry, this situation sounds incredibly frustrating!

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Partner works incredibly long hours, how much do they help out?

I'm struggling. Have been for a while. I've had one break from parenting my daughter, that was for 3 hours in December when I left her with her dad.

She's 14 months old and I'm just tired. I've done every night by myself. He's out of bed at 4am and doesn't get home until 7-9pm. He drives for work, very physically tiring.
On the weekends he was doing 6 days, one weekend day off, but now has both off.

He doesn't sit on the floor and play with her, he doesn't read to her because he says she doesn't have the patience.
He will pick her up and hold her whilst he's cooking.

Recently I've been "snappy" with him.
He got back from the mechanic last weekend, she was getting onto the sofa and he put his headphones on and started to watch Netflix on his phone.
The same day I told him I was going to run her bath and to watch her whilst she was still eating, he fell asleep on the sofa.

Today he went to football after going shopping, so was out 1-3 and then from 4-8.
He got back and I was snappy.

"I don't get why you're so snappy with me"

I said - Probably because I haven't had a break since December.

"Do you think I don't know you haven't had a break. I haven't had a break", "I just won't go to work, I'll sit at home all day".

Then "do you think I like not having a connection to my child"... But that's on him? He never sits to play with her. He "doesn't see the point". He's stated that this age is boring to him.

Since she's been born, he has been to a friend's once a month. Football - He stopped going for 7months, but has been the last two weekends.

Are these not breaks?

He does do the washing/washing up/cooking/vacuuming when I haven't had a chance to; but I'm the one in charge of feeding her, naps/bedtime, teeth brushing, hair brushing, baths, dressing her, making sure she has the right shoes, appointments etc. Everything falls on me.

If your partner works ridiculously long hours, how much do they look after your child? Do you ever get a break?

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