Just venting🫠

So im married and i meet my husband 4/5 years ago. We have two little girls, and we are suppoused to be ok, but he is always reacting to other womens on IG, or talking to other woman even when he knows it hurts me. I dont know what to do at this point. I dont want to divorce because i want my girls to grow up in a family and feel supported. But at the same time i feel like my selflove and my confidence falling apart. How you deal with somenthing like this? Just ignore it and live with it. I dont want to fight anymore about this. I talk so many times. I feel defeat and i feel the only two options i got is break my family or live my life ignoring my problems.

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Wow first of all that's super disrespectful of your husband acting in appropriately when he knows this is hurting you. I would even go as far as calling it deceitful as his commitment should be on you and your babies and not trying to chase new girls. Liking and messaging these girls photos Physically let's these girls know that he is Interested in Them, opening a door for that. Alot of couples meet online nowadays. Be strong, stand your ground and tell him you've had enough! If he wants to glare and message other girls then why not leave your family and get what he wants?? Tell him how you really feel and do not put up with this, if you allow repetitive disrespect he will continue to think it's allowed. So sorry for being so blunt and harsh but you deserve a man who is committed to family values and dedicated to You! The man should make you feel like a queen

First love yourself. Your little girl learning how woman need to be treated . How stand for herself. He doesn't respect you;/ or your family. Change is needed. And it's always more then 2 choices. Good luck girl 💕

Honestly, I'd reframe what you said and tell you that you aren't breaking your family by leaving, he already has broken it. Your girls can feel the tension whether it's spoken about or not and over time they will start to wonder if they're the reasons for the problems. It's never good to stay in a relationship "for the kids" and life is too short. Respect yourself and leave, your kids will learn over time in age appropriate manners why you aren't together and they will be way better off with a happy mom than a miserable one.

Everything the others said is true. But girl don’t even stress out. Treat home like he treats you and see what happens. This may not be the best advice but go on IG and like other men pics too. Do it when you’re right next to him. And when he asks, tell him well you do it. Is okay when you do it and it’s not when I do it? But don’t take my advice I’m just that petty.

So you are unhappy and hurt 😞 what is the msg u want your daughters to have? It’s ok to feel hurt? It’s ok to feel disrespected? It’s ok to ignore o
Your feelings? Do you think they will feel supported knowing feeling their mama is not ? No mama, you deserve to be happy be respect and supported as your kids. ❤️❤️❤️

As a child of parents who “stayed together for the kids” you have to leave him. Spent almost everyday of my childhood wishing my parents would break up instead of fighting everyday Infront of us or anytime we went out to do something fun was ruined bc they can’t stand each other. If you’ve tried and tried and he hasn’t then It’s better to break up than stay in an unhappy relationship, set good examples for your kids and teach them what love should be.

First and foremost, if someone "broke up your family," it's him. You say you want your girls to grow up in a family and feel supported. What they're seeing is how a man should treat them and what they should expect of a future spouse. If you're ok with them being treated by their husband how he's treating you, stay and keep putting up with it. If not, you have to make a change and show them that's not ok.

Baaaaaabe, if you don’t wanna leave start exhibiting the same behavior he is 😇 if this were me, I’d say “I see you doing XYZ, I’d like to be in an open relationship.” I would only do this after I found someone else. 🥰 it’s not fair of you to go through this pain and him just be super inconsiderate about your half of the relationship. I would recommend finding someone taller, richer and hotter 💁🏻‍♀️ you can find those men at expensive restaurant bars, hotel bars, or anywhere business men go.

It's sad to see the people recommending you to stoop to his level. Just have some self respect and leave.

yup I said the same thing. That’s how you treat these men . Watch him change real quick when she starts to treat him the way he treats her

Separating isn't breaking your family if you still co-parent. For some people, separating is finding the best solution for your children to have maximum love & happiness.

If that's the route you go, please know it's not as bad as we as women have been conditions to think it is!

in our community

wtf moment?

I have been going back and forth with my husband lately. Well not lately it’s been years. He is the best husband and father you could ask for; for two weeks. Then he’s inconsistent. It drives me mad. Then he’s back to husband and dad of the year , then back to same inconsistency. I talked to him about this last night and he said “if i was lovey dovey and acted like this all the time you’d get bored and cheat on me.”

Ok so for starters i know some of you are going to say omg omg omg super controlling omg leave omg. No im not doing that. Im happy he finally admitted his wrong doing and taking accountability for it but id like to know the deeper reason, the what the f has him thinking like this reason, the personality trait reason. He’s obviously scared I’m going to leave him; so much so that he’s doing this dumb shit to prevent it. Past trauma? What do y’all think I can do to get him to see I’m not going anywhere? I’m consistent already, I married him, we have a baby. He really is the love of my life. I have never loved another man like this before.. but this shit is for the birds and he thinks he’s keeping me doing this but in actuality it’s making me lose respect and detach.

worried about a family members baby

So this child is three months old and she isn’t being fed from 10pm till 6/7 am idk if this is normal or safe and it’s been like this since 2 months i believe as she won’t wake her for feeds she goes to the pub drinking most nights with her baby and her baby has already been in hospital with a very low temperature bc she was outside but as soon as she was in a warm car she warmed up and doctors said she was fine she lets cats play with her bouncers toys that go over her and doesn’t strap her in she is cold from what i’ve heard from other family members and they’ve tried to warm her hands and she’s wet herself at my parents and she hasn’t had a spare vest to put on her and i offered her a blanket as she didn’t have one and she declined and she won’t listen to anyone about it she’s already left the baby with my parents for the night to go out drinking and personally i couldn’t leave my three month old because my parents said she just cried and im really unsure whether to report her or not and her house smells of dog wee/poo as she’s never home to look after them and that’s not safe for the baby i understand being lonely but she doesn’t need to go to the pub every night her friends could
go
to hers or her she could go to a cafe that has closed doors not sat outside a cold pub and it’s a bit of a rough pub in my opinion

my parents are concerned btw but they say i shouldn’t report her as it’s not fair but i feel how the baby is treated isn’t fair

Does anyone else hate their partner?

I’m now a little over 2 months postpartum and I’ve struggled with genuinely just not liking my partner anymore since we found out I was pregnant last year. I catch myself just staring at him with hatred because I’m so sick and tired of his bullshit. He is just now getting a job and has not had one since THANKSGIVING!!! Meanwhile I was working full time until I finally got too sick to be able to work. I genuinely want him out of my house but I depend on him as far as driving goes bc I don’t have a car. I also still love him deep down and don’t want to put him out on the street but he’s driving me genuinely insane. Any advice?

Heartbreak

After years of trying, months of back and fourth on the fate of our marriage, indecision, fights. The whole enchilada my husband and I are separating, divorcing. Whatever. I'm so goddamn heart broken. I feel like it's a death and I'm in mourning. We have a 3 year old son and currently and for the foreseeable we are going to coparent and live together. This makes things harder because neither one of us can really move on but it's how it is. He understands and he's trying to heal too. But I can't understand why now that things are over he can be kind. He's been more amazing in the last week since I ended things than ever. Why couldn't he do that when we were together for years I begged for change, we saw a counselor I tried everything and he just wouldn't. Now he seems to turn a switch and be able to just do it all. But it's too late. My heart aches. My body aches. Love sucks.

Help!!!

Am I wrong if I secide to stop doing baths etc for my little ones. We have a 3 and 1 year old. I do all the baths wake up in ams cooking etc. I dont want them to be dirty but it's like I need a break and Im tired of doing it all by myself. He will come up and help after they are out the tub every now and then and that pisses me off. Im taking care of 2 littles one by myself makes no sense. I asked him to give them baths tonight he said I worked all day what did you do...ive had the children all day. We went to church he didn't go. We all know how little ones are.. but what should I do bcus it feels like I'm going crazy

Partner works incredibly long hours, how much do they help out?

I'm struggling. Have been for a while. I've had one break from parenting my daughter, that was for 3 hours in December when I left her with her dad.

She's 14 months old and I'm just tired. I've done every night by myself. He's out of bed at 4am and doesn't get home until 7-9pm. He drives for work, very physically tiring.
On the weekends he was doing 6 days, one weekend day off, but now has both off.

He doesn't sit on the floor and play with her, he doesn't read to her because he says she doesn't have the patience.
He will pick her up and hold her whilst he's cooking.

Recently I've been "snappy" with him.
He got back from the mechanic last weekend, she was getting onto the sofa and he put his headphones on and started to watch Netflix on his phone.
The same day I told him I was going to run her bath and to watch her whilst she was still eating, he fell asleep on the sofa.

Today he went to football after going shopping, so was out 1-3 and then from 4-8.
He got back and I was snappy.

"I don't get why you're so snappy with me"

I said - Probably because I haven't had a break since December.

"Do you think I don't know you haven't had a break. I haven't had a break", "I just won't go to work, I'll sit at home all day".

Then "do you think I like not having a connection to my child"... But that's on him? He never sits to play with her. He "doesn't see the point". He's stated that this age is boring to him.

Since she's been born, he has been to a friend's once a month. Football - He stopped going for 7months, but has been the last two weekends.

Are these not breaks?

He does do the washing/washing up/cooking/vacuuming when I haven't had a chance to; but I'm the one in charge of feeding her, naps/bedtime, teeth brushing, hair brushing, baths, dressing her, making sure she has the right shoes, appointments etc. Everything falls on me.

If your partner works ridiculously long hours, how much do they look after your child? Do you ever get a break?