MIL has husband’s location?

My husband has his location switched on with his mum, is this weird?
I don’t know why it creeps me out a bit that she always knows where he is, so knows where we are??

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Argh mine too. I find it so so so weird. I think mine even has a notification set up to be notified when he leaves home. I think she does it for both kids. I don’t get it 🤷🏼‍♀️

He’s 33 and her daughter is 24, so it’s not like they’re small…..

I have mine shared with my dad 🤷🏼‍♀️ I also share with my partner. I’ve never actively checked, it’s just for emergency.

Sarah, this makes sense and I also have my husband. But my mil doesn’t actually respond in emergency situations, her phone is on silent when we phone her unless she needs something. Which to me says that she’s just doing it out of interest, and not with ‘helping if/when needed’ in mind.

is it two ways? My dad has my grandmas location both ways because she never answers her phone. He uses it to see if she’s home for a visit since her phone is always silent in her bag. Some people use it to see if family/friends who are useless at communicating or timing are on their way. I think my own dad has my location to ping if I am 5 mins from their house to put the kettle on. It really doesn’t bother me since I have zero secrets 😂 I’m pretty boring x

I think there’s a huge difference between having a tracker on for putting a kettle on, or because someone’s not good at answering AND having the obsession of knowing where your family is at all times. I don’t mind the first example, but I do think that the obsession part is too much. Parents of older children should be able to step away and have their own life, this is also when poor communication is concerned.
Sarah, I’m trying to think at what point this wouldn’t bother me, and I wonder if your family is just very chill? For us, this is more like ‘oh I noticed you were here and there and what did you need there?’ type of questions that I resent. Have to admit, I wish my family had the tracker on so that my cuppa or dinner was ready 😭😊

yeah, we are all super chill and literally no one cares where you are. My partner works overseas a lot so my dad and partner I think just like the security to see baby and I are home safe (if I wasn’t answering my phone). We live in London with no village and I think they feel better just knowing if they couldn’t get hold of me or I’m busy with baby they can see I’m home safe. If someone was asking me where I was though or nosing at my car and whereabouts I wouldn’t be standing it. Some people are control freaks.

The obsessive controlling bit is where it’s weird and very unhealthy, the safety and fun alerts side is where it’s normal.

The kettle/dinner 5 minute warning is pretty smart though. I think it’s like when I am 2 miles away 🤣 if I want to sneak up I put it on airplane mode x

My husband's family does this. We participated for a little bit, but I got sick of it extremely quickly. We rarely ever go anywhere out of the ordinary, and when we do, I believe it should be our business. If there's ever an emergency, we will either eventually get in contact with everybody ourselves, or they'll hear from the first responders. 🤷🏼‍♀️

My family does this, and it doesn't bother me at all! I have my location shared with my husband, parents, and sister. It's super convenient for me as it's easy to just go to maps and get an ETA instead of texting them. It's not for everyone, but I love it. We also all have a great relationship. That being said, I would never be able to share my location with my husband's side. The same trust and closeness just isn't there.

My family has everyone’s location (mom, dad, sister, grandma). We have it in case of emergencies, I check it to see if they’re home before I call one of them, and we’ve used it when grandma left her phone at the grocery store so we knew where to go pick it up 😉 For context, my mom, dad, and grandma live 4.5 hours from me and my sister lives 2 hours from me.

Honestly I use Life360 with my mom and my husband. He drives a lot so I pay for it in case he gets in a wreck while doing long drives going to different job sites throughout the day, and for me in case I need help while I'm out with our daughter. However my MIL doesn't have our locations, the only time we maybe share it with her is when we're meeting up with her so she knows when we will get there since we live an hour away. Usually I share it with her for an hour since we both have iPhones. But idk, I wouldn't be surprised if my MIL has my SIL location since she's still single and dating.

Break his phone by accident on purpose lol

in our community

wtf moment?

I have been going back and forth with my husband lately. Well not lately it’s been years. He is the best husband and father you could ask for; for two weeks. Then he’s inconsistent. It drives me mad. Then he’s back to husband and dad of the year , then back to same inconsistency. I talked to him about this last night and he said “if i was lovey dovey and acted like this all the time you’d get bored and cheat on me.”

Ok so for starters i know some of you are going to say omg omg omg super controlling omg leave omg. No im not doing that. Im happy he finally admitted his wrong doing and taking accountability for it but id like to know the deeper reason, the what the f has him thinking like this reason, the personality trait reason. He’s obviously scared I’m going to leave him; so much so that he’s doing this dumb shit to prevent it. Past trauma? What do y’all think I can do to get him to see I’m not going anywhere? I’m consistent already, I married him, we have a baby. He really is the love of my life. I have never loved another man like this before.. but this shit is for the birds and he thinks he’s keeping me doing this but in actuality it’s making me lose respect and detach.

worried about a family members baby

So this child is three months old and she isn’t being fed from 10pm till 6/7 am idk if this is normal or safe and it’s been like this since 2 months i believe as she won’t wake her for feeds she goes to the pub drinking most nights with her baby and her baby has already been in hospital with a very low temperature bc she was outside but as soon as she was in a warm car she warmed up and doctors said she was fine she lets cats play with her bouncers toys that go over her and doesn’t strap her in she is cold from what i’ve heard from other family members and they’ve tried to warm her hands and she’s wet herself at my parents and she hasn’t had a spare vest to put on her and i offered her a blanket as she didn’t have one and she declined and she won’t listen to anyone about it she’s already left the baby with my parents for the night to go out drinking and personally i couldn’t leave my three month old because my parents said she just cried and im really unsure whether to report her or not and her house smells of dog wee/poo as she’s never home to look after them and that’s not safe for the baby i understand being lonely but she doesn’t need to go to the pub every night her friends could
go
to hers or her she could go to a cafe that has closed doors not sat outside a cold pub and it’s a bit of a rough pub in my opinion

my parents are concerned btw but they say i shouldn’t report her as it’s not fair but i feel how the baby is treated isn’t fair

Does anyone else hate their partner?

I’m now a little over 2 months postpartum and I’ve struggled with genuinely just not liking my partner anymore since we found out I was pregnant last year. I catch myself just staring at him with hatred because I’m so sick and tired of his bullshit. He is just now getting a job and has not had one since THANKSGIVING!!! Meanwhile I was working full time until I finally got too sick to be able to work. I genuinely want him out of my house but I depend on him as far as driving goes bc I don’t have a car. I also still love him deep down and don’t want to put him out on the street but he’s driving me genuinely insane. Any advice?

Heartbreak

After years of trying, months of back and fourth on the fate of our marriage, indecision, fights. The whole enchilada my husband and I are separating, divorcing. Whatever. I'm so goddamn heart broken. I feel like it's a death and I'm in mourning. We have a 3 year old son and currently and for the foreseeable we are going to coparent and live together. This makes things harder because neither one of us can really move on but it's how it is. He understands and he's trying to heal too. But I can't understand why now that things are over he can be kind. He's been more amazing in the last week since I ended things than ever. Why couldn't he do that when we were together for years I begged for change, we saw a counselor I tried everything and he just wouldn't. Now he seems to turn a switch and be able to just do it all. But it's too late. My heart aches. My body aches. Love sucks.

Partner works incredibly long hours, how much do they help out?

I'm struggling. Have been for a while. I've had one break from parenting my daughter, that was for 3 hours in December when I left her with her dad.

She's 14 months old and I'm just tired. I've done every night by myself. He's out of bed at 4am and doesn't get home until 7-9pm. He drives for work, very physically tiring.
On the weekends he was doing 6 days, one weekend day off, but now has both off.

He doesn't sit on the floor and play with her, he doesn't read to her because he says she doesn't have the patience.
He will pick her up and hold her whilst he's cooking.

Recently I've been "snappy" with him.
He got back from the mechanic last weekend, she was getting onto the sofa and he put his headphones on and started to watch Netflix on his phone.
The same day I told him I was going to run her bath and to watch her whilst she was still eating, he fell asleep on the sofa.

Today he went to football after going shopping, so was out 1-3 and then from 4-8.
He got back and I was snappy.

"I don't get why you're so snappy with me"

I said - Probably because I haven't had a break since December.

"Do you think I don't know you haven't had a break. I haven't had a break", "I just won't go to work, I'll sit at home all day".

Then "do you think I like not having a connection to my child"... But that's on him? He never sits to play with her. He "doesn't see the point". He's stated that this age is boring to him.

Since she's been born, he has been to a friend's once a month. Football - He stopped going for 7months, but has been the last two weekends.

Are these not breaks?

He does do the washing/washing up/cooking/vacuuming when I haven't had a chance to; but I'm the one in charge of feeding her, naps/bedtime, teeth brushing, hair brushing, baths, dressing her, making sure she has the right shoes, appointments etc. Everything falls on me.

If your partner works ridiculously long hours, how much do they look after your child? Do you ever get a break?

Am I wrong ?

My daughter’s 1st birthday was Thursday and nobody wished her a happy birthday from her dads family but his mom watched his story. Should I put my foot down and set boundaries for them to accept accountability or should I just let them stay on that side for as long as they want and not worry about it?