My husband keeps placing baby in front of TV

Our baby is only 3 months old. I watch him 24/7 and still wake up twice every night. On his day off I give him the baby and have an extra lie in that’s when he puts cocomelon on for baby.

I’m so conflicted because I need that time to myself, he knows that it bothers me and baby is too young for tv. I see red when he does this and we sleep in different rooms now but he still continues to do this. I’m just venting

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Take the time for you.
That’s just as important and your babies development.

Maybe suggest dancing fruit instead or something?

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He’s a parent too. He gets to make parenting decisions just as much as you.

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I would have a proper chat with him about how you feel. I’m the same as I’ve heard screens under 18months not good for babies brain development. Does he put the baby in front of the tv so he can do things he wants? I spoke with my hubby about this & told him I feel strongly.

Maybe get your hubby to find other ways to play/spend time with your baby that don’t involve a screen? Toys or age appropriate activities they can do together. That way he still feels like he’s making a decision about the baby & has choices, not feeling like you’re making him do something, that’s what I did with my hubby & it’s great.

Although in this age of technology it will be inevitable to avoid screens all the time, I’m doing my best. If baby catches glimpse of tv as we’re turning it off, not much you can do about it, but I wouldn’t let baby watch tv that young or at least under 18months.

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Also remember independent play is important for babies, even if you had a play pen so baby couldn’t see tv, but hubby can still monitor them, could be an idea?

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I mean talk to him more about it but I personally don’t see a problem with tv. We always have it on. I don’t think it’s great he just puts him there but I don’t think it’s a problem. But son doesn’t really care for it because it’s just always there. But if you don’t like it and dad needs to interact with baby more then I would just discuss it with him

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And if this is the only time they do tv I think it’s completely fine to do it once or twice a week for a little bit

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I would talk to him more about it. I had this for a good few months but kept putting my boundary in place. Gave my partner (and other family members) all the explainations over and over. I have LO most of the time, so if the TV was on, I'd make a point of turning him away from it and engaging with him doing something else. I moved his toys to his own room for us to play without being distracted by it. Partner pretty much copies how I play with LO as he has seen/heard me and what I do. A couple of times, the TV was on and obvs LO is visually pulled to it and my partner noticed that he zombied out and wouldn't interact...from that point, after he'd enjoyed play and interaction with him, to seeing him like that, he totally got it and fully supports me. I don't think he was vehemently opposed to no TV, he just didn't understand why, especially as things were different when we were kids. So I think talk/explain more, maybe as others have said, guide/setup other play for them?

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Maybe explain to him that 3m old brains are very different to ours and they don't need sensory stimulation or to be 'entertained' he can simply put the baby on the floor or in a bouncer to be more upright and carry on with his day. If baby gets unsettled maybe invest in a carrier so he can continue to get things done while settling and comforting 😊 I'd give him the benefit of the doubt that maybe he is just still learning how to be a parent! Dads don't research this stuff like mums do (generally) so we unfortunately have to educate them haha

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I've finally done it

I have finally done it. I have finally become the trope, the stereotype.

I have become bitter, resentful, and very overwhelmed and overloaded. I am very unhappy and hit burnout. And I snapped at my husband last night. I work full-time, and work has been very busy so im working late a lot. Im also in grad school. I also have a toddler that has become VERY clingy with me. My husband works shorter days but commutes, so he usually gets home after me by an hour or more. When he gets home, he usually heads to the restroom for at least 30 mins when he gets home. And now my toddler doesnt want anything to do with him. So im doing all the toddler duties until bed. I dont get 5 mins to myself. Not for almost 2 years. I finally hit my wall. I have also, somehow, become my MILs medical ride service and she somehow has an appt every week, it seems?! Shes not sick!! My husband was complaining that he needs to change routine to fit in a workout sometimes, and I lost it. I have been BEGGING for 5 mins to myself for months. I have been telling him how im not good, im going to burn out for months. And between his attitude and him complaining (which really got me b/c he blames me for not being able to work out?! Saying I need help when he gets home so he just cant workout now) I just lost it completely. I told him how unfair my life has become and I have the entire mental and emotional load and it is just not fair. He got mad at me and said "hes trying" when hes literally not trying at all. What do I do?? No one is taking the load from me! And im done and dont know what to do now.
I do not like this version of me.

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17

AITA?

This isn't a major issue, just wondering if I'm being a bit of an asshole.

• I do shift work, 5 out of 7 days, full-time.
• My partner works from home (mostly, sometimes he goes into the office) M-F, full-time.

Anyway, whenever I have a day off during the week he gets in his feelings when I make myself food (breakfast and lunch) but not him. His reason is he's working, I'm not - Which is fair but I've asked him how many times on a weekend has he gotten up, on his day off and made me breakfast and a lunch to take with me to work? You guessed it, 0.

So basically, just because I'm at home I don't think the responsibility to feed him should automatically fall on me when he manages to feed himself just fine while I'm at work.

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22

Big vent!

Hi mums.
I'm a first time mum in my 40s to twin boys.They are almost 5 months old and the biggest miracle in my life!
I am struggling!!!
I'm pretty sure I have ppa as my pregnancy was a very high risk and all I remember was crying from anxiety of all the ifs!Thankfully even born at 35 weeks and skinny,didn't need iu time.
My husband is not helping much because he's always too busy with work.He will "look" after them usually between 8pm-12am so I can have a chance to sleep.
He expects me to just sleep when I touch the pillow,even though I hear tje babies crying and him don't really bother because most of the times he'll be on his laptop working.
When I tell him I can't relax to fall asleep because I feel you r neglecting the babies,he says I'm the problem becauae I'm always there with them and don't give them alone time!!
I am angry!!I am furious!!
I can't keep.up.with housework becauae someone alwaya neess me and most of the times they nap I either cook and clean tje kitchen,do laundry or try and take a quick nap.
He doesn't help.around the house,becauae..guess what?always super busy.
I asked him nicely we could clean the house together every Saturday morning so it's easier and quicker for both of us and he said no,because he has a lot of work but probably wants to sleep until 12 or 2.
2 days ago a button of his coat ripped and I told him I'll sew it these days.
Earlier this morning while running late for his work,as always,he weara the coat and told him didn't get the chance to fix the button and sarcastically said..of.course u didn't!!!
I spent all night awake because one of the babies had congested nose and we've been trying to reduce one fees at night.
I wanted to punch him!!He left and I started crying...I cry so much,even at 5 months pp...
I can't go on like this anymoreeeee...
The crying in my ears is constant..my head is always numb..I've gained so much weight and can't find the strength to get back on track..
Even if I try to.find a therapist to just talk,is it gonna help?I really don't know😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

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Avoidant husband

I love my husband and he is a good man. We have some issues in our relationship however, as he has an avoidant attachment style (finds romance/intimacy/being emotional difficult). This comes from him having to be independent from a young age and having quite an abusive mother.
The issues in our relationship are mainly around a lack of sex and intimacy. I think the problem is that to feel turned on, I need to feel connected and wanted. My husband (being avoidant) will usually make jokes about being horny whereas I would want to have someone make me feel beautiful/sexy to get in the mood.
It sounds terrible but I've sometimes had dreams about exes that would make me feel this way, and the romance we had (eye contact, intensity, deep words). It makes me feel really guilty but I feel like i'm starved of that. My husband would like a lot more sex but I can't always force myself if I'm not feeling it.
We've spoken a bit about therapy but I know its often really expensive so we probably wouldn't be able to afford it. Do you have any suggestions please? I know that neither of us are wrong in what we want, just different but I'm scared about whether we can fix it or if we're doomed?

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BLW Advice!

Did anyone else baby have a hard time with textures when it pertains to solids. My son is 9 months and he still only eats the food that is mashed or puree. Do you think this is a phase? Or does anyone have any tips?

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Toddler snacks in the morning ?

Hey.

My 14m is clearly going through a growth spurt. He’s a fussy eater but recently started having two breakfasts with the childminder and that’s even after milk in the morning.

He wakes at 6am and we leave around 7:05am. Has 6oz when he wakes but then is seemly hungry looking for snacks before we leave. The only issue is, he’s a fussy eater and won’t sit and eat fruit etc so struggling to think what I can give him that’s suitable.

Any fussy eater suitable ideas of what I can make or get him to snack on whilst we finish getting ready to get out the door?

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