Need support am scared..
I’m in a very sad confusing time right now. I left the father of my daughter a little over a month ago and I moved back in with my family. We have an almost 2 year old daughter together and after almost 4 years of being together the nature of the relationship got so bad and mentally/verbally abusive from him I couldn’t take it anymore. I moved planning for a fresh start even though I didn’t want to but he would do anything and say anything in front of our daughter long story short I moved away from him and he still sees our daughter equal amount as I do. I was due for my period around the 20th of December and never ended up getting it.. I had a feeling I was pregnant bc of the symptoms. The last time we were intimate was a week or 2 before I moved and we both were not sober that night and that’s the last time we had any relations.. I ended up taking the pregnancy test and it was positive.. I have been battling myself ever since and I know it was not responsible on my end bc I knew we didn’t have a good relationship. I have always said I would never terminate a pregnancy.. I know I cannot have another baby by this man. He is not a good guy to me and has very bad ways about him.. I’ve been in a depression ever since and I know I can not have another baby by him. I have been crying and emotions have been a wreck.. I scheduled an abortion appointment for this week and I am just lost. I do not want to go through with it but I feel if I continue with the pregnancy it will not be good because of the man it’s with. I’m so beyond disappointed in myself I feel so wrong doing this but I feel I will be in a worse situation if I continue.. has anyone been in a similar situation..? I’m scared and depressed I feel like I will have never ending guilt by doing this. I’ve been very sick and tired for weeks now bc of the pregnancy and overall exhausted. No one knows not even the father.. am I wrong for not telling anyone… I feel sick to my stomach I haven’t been able to really do anything for weeks bc of being so sick and I have even more guilt not telling anyone but I know I can’t.
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I’m sorry for what you are going through. I can’t even imagine how you are feeling. I can only tell you that whatever decision you make is going to be forever in your mind…There are some many other options that you can follow instead of terminating this precious life if you can’t take care of this baby. I know many people who have been through abortion and the guilt follows them until this day. I have heard testimonies (on YouTube) of women that are in their late 70s and every day they cry for ending their baby’s life. I’m going to pray for you. If you need someone to talk to, please don’t hesitate to contact me ☺️
I suggest you talk to a therapist or a counselor from the clinic beforehand if possible. There are immediate considerations like getting full custody of your 2 year old due to the abuse. I haven’t been in your specific situation, but I had an abortion when I was 26. I had my reasons for it, and yes I think about it often. I am sharing this, because the regret I have was not talking about it with anyone. My advice is to reach out to a professional and get all your questions answered. This is your choice, give yourself grace to make this decision.
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