New family fear and depressed BD??

Anyone break up with BD just for them to start a new family and be a nice dad to that child and awesome husband?
I’m so scared this will happen if I leave.

My Bd says he’s depressed and rude and I’m terrified why he’s so distant with his family but not with friends. Is this normal with depression?

Back story: my own dad cheated and I’m terrified historys repeating itself. my own parents say they’ll be in my baby’s life if her dad isn’t but they cheated so I just don’t feel like her seeing them as her support system is any better :(

As far as I know I haven’t been cheated on- I’m just scared he wants to since he’s SO distant. He only talks to me for maybe 10 minutes a day and says it’s cause he’s depressed but when he’s hanging out with friends he’s so happy. He laughs with others like he used to with me but now that I’m a mom and have to get shit done- “I’m no fun”. So scared he’ll find someone who makes him happy, blame his depression on me, then ignore our little baby. My dad did this and it sucks.

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GIRL GET OUT OF THAT TOXIC ASS RELATIONSHIP. He’s not ready for the responsibility of fatherhood, he bit off more than he could chew, & he’s too pussy to admit it so he’s using “depression” as an excuse to get out of being a father & supportive partner.

I’m sorry you’re going through this-it’s completely understandable how you feel. Of course I don’t know this man and he could be cheating but It’s also very common to apply your parent’s relationship to your own interpersonal relationships. You have to learn how to differentiate between fact and feelings (not that one is right and the other is wrong just that we can end up hurting our relationships further by not realizing this). Has he given you a reason other than being distant to believe he is cheating?
Everyone is different when it comes to dealing with their issues-if he feels as though he is depressed he should care about himself and his family and seek help. It is a good thing he has support from his friends and he can enjoy that time but there shouldn’t be such a contrast between his home life and his friends that you feel left out. There is clearly unresolved issues and it seems he is being avoidant rather than communicating which is unfair to you.

Sounds like yall really need counseling. He’s a man so can’t bring it up at home. Get him isolated, let the grandparents keep the baby and do something fun with him. Tell him to not plan anything for his friends on a day grandparents confirmed they got the baby and plan a whole day together. Let him choose where to eat and when y’all sit down have that discussion. Or if he likes planning let him plan the day you just get babysitter aka grandparents on lock. Y’all got this. If you think it’s worth it fight for it but you can’t go about it the way you have, gotta try a different approach 😉

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Divorced at 5 months PP

My husband just divorced me yesterday.

I'm 5 months post partum and I feel like complete shit. I literally can't stop crying and I don't feel like eating and this whole week my milk supply has gone down due to stress and not eating. What helps with milk supply?

The divorce- on Monday at 5am me and my husband had a small argument on text. It was regarding him not catering to my love language. I sent him a video on how women shouldn't have to ask and how laziness can kill a relationship. We've had many arguments regarding this prior about him not catering to my love language and he doesn't buy me flowers or doesn't think of me. Anyways this night, he text me saying he doesn't do Mother's Day and all that, he doesn't want to buy me flowers because my sisters buy me flowers and he can't be arsed with my moods. He said I've not been his peace and said he's done.
I replied "okay. All I want is for you to appreciate me and love me as your wife and mother of your child. I'm not pushing you away, I'm begging you to love me etc etc. I'm done too."

I come home from my errands that morning and he's upped and left. He took all of his belongings, clothes, drawer, tv- everything.

He didn't ring or text me or anything.

The property is in my name and as he left and didn't leave the key, I changed the locks the next day. I feel this is what pushed him over the edge.

He officially divorced me on Saturday.
I'm 5 months post partum and I have a 5 year old from my ex partner too.

I just want to talk about it with someone that's not biased. Was I asking for too much? I feel he just didn't want to be with me anymore and used this as an excuse? Or is that me overthinking....
Input would be nice xoxo

wtf moment?

I have been going back and forth with my husband lately. Well not lately it’s been years. He is the best husband and father you could ask for; for two weeks. Then he’s inconsistent. It drives me mad. Then he’s back to husband and dad of the year , then back to same inconsistency. I talked to him about this last night and he said “if i was lovey dovey and acted like this all the time you’d get bored and cheat on me.”

Ok so for starters i know some of you are going to say omg omg omg super controlling omg leave omg. No im not doing that. Im happy he finally admitted his wrong doing and taking accountability for it but id like to know the deeper reason, the what the f has him thinking like this reason, the personality trait reason. He’s obviously scared I’m going to leave him; so much so that he’s doing this dumb shit to prevent it. Past trauma? What do y’all think I can do to get him to see I’m not going anywhere? I’m consistent already, I married him, we have a baby. He really is the love of my life. I have never loved another man like this before.. but this shit is for the birds and he thinks he’s keeping me doing this but in actuality it’s making me lose respect and detach.

Partner is giving me the silent treatment

So I was struggling with my postpartum anxiety bad yesterday. My partner and I was out for drinks with family. He kept making jokes about treating me a bit shit.
Which no one thought was funny. I am usually quite patient about him using me as his jokes, but yesterday it hurt.

When we got home I told him it made me feel disrespected. Now he is giving me the cold fat shoulder?! What do I do ?

worried about a family members baby

So this child is three months old and she isn’t being fed from 10pm till 6/7 am idk if this is normal or safe and it’s been like this since 2 months i believe as she won’t wake her for feeds she goes to the pub drinking most nights with her baby and her baby has already been in hospital with a very low temperature bc she was outside but as soon as she was in a warm car she warmed up and doctors said she was fine she lets cats play with her bouncers toys that go over her and doesn’t strap her in she is cold from what i’ve heard from other family members and they’ve tried to warm her hands and she’s wet herself at my parents and she hasn’t had a spare vest to put on her and i offered her a blanket as she didn’t have one and she declined and she won’t listen to anyone about it she’s already left the baby with my parents for the night to go out drinking and personally i couldn’t leave my three month old because my parents said she just cried and im really unsure whether to report her or not and her house smells of dog wee/poo as she’s never home to look after them and that’s not safe for the baby i understand being lonely but she doesn’t need to go to the pub every night her friends could
go
to hers or her she could go to a cafe that has closed doors not sat outside a cold pub and it’s a bit of a rough pub in my opinion

my parents are concerned btw but they say i shouldn’t report her as it’s not fair but i feel how the baby is treated isn’t fair

Forgiving a partner…

Long story short - found out 2 months ago my partner of almost 10 years has slept with two girls, one of which he’s been seeing for 8 months - during this time I was pregnant with our third child and gave birth. (She had an abortion)
I found out, he cut all ties (still works with her)
I want to try and move on from this, we have three children , and a home… I can’t face the idea of being without my children half the time. I want to try and make things work. But I can’t stop the intrusive thoughts / images of the two of them together…. Any advice if you’ve been in a similar situation?
Sick of feeling this rubbish, also 5 month pp so hormones/confidence is in pieces😣😣😣

Does anyone else hate their partner?

I’m now a little over 2 months postpartum and I’ve struggled with genuinely just not liking my partner anymore since we found out I was pregnant last year. I catch myself just staring at him with hatred because I’m so sick and tired of his bullshit. He is just now getting a job and has not had one since THANKSGIVING!!! Meanwhile I was working full time until I finally got too sick to be able to work. I genuinely want him out of my house but I depend on him as far as driving goes bc I don’t have a car. I also still love him deep down and don’t want to put him out on the street but he’s driving me genuinely insane. Any advice?