I never knew this about motherhood

I feel like I am losing my friends. People I’ve known for 10+ years. One by one they have slowly started disappearing after I got married in 2022 and had my son in Sept 2023. I make an effort…I really do. My baby was colic and I got bad PPD/PPA and I was hospitalized with preeclampsia. I told them this and they still abandoned me. No one called. No one texted me if I was ok. Theres been a couple of times I tried to put something together (even when I was sleep deprived from the baby) and they flaked more than once. Is this motherhood??

Read more on Peanut

The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of Peanut.

Learn more about our guidelines.

Add a comment

I'm sorry… I think most people don’t understand postpartum unless they have been through it. I feel bad for all the friends who had babies before me because I didn’t realize what they were going through and didn’t check on them as much as I should have. That said, the friends who had babies before me were amazing at checking on me and good friends do make an effort, especially if you tell them you are having issues or feeling lonely.

Aww you are not alone ❤️ friends and even family I thought would be there are no where to be found. I even told friends when I was newly postpartum how bad I was struggling mentally and they would say “we’ll plan something soon” but never did. It’s really sad ☹️ I have found when I try to focus my energy on meeting new friends or new connections that seems to help me.

i’ve felt the loneliest in motherhood, even with friends who’ve had children. i don’t have babysit support and my friends are so understanding. sending good vibes ✨

Friends who I have been friends with for awhile almost even stepped away when I was pregnant. But it actually brought me closer to another friend who is a mom. She has been a good resource for advice and questions.

same thing happened to me 😞 my closest friend came over 3 ish weeks pp after I had a very traumatic c section and recovery.. I bawled my eyes out to her and she was so uncomfortable and never asked me how I was doing ever again

im so sorry to hear that 😢 that must of been really hard. It’s not easy when friends let you down in the time you need them the most.

thank you 💜I’m sorry you experienced that as well, it’s so isolating. I joined a local new moms group in my area and making mom friends has been SOO helpful!

Wow sounds like a Saturn return! Ages 27-32! Clean slate! And if you are not in that age range, the best is yet to come and just doesn’t involve those cats. Embrace the clear canvas! Start painting your joy! 🙌🏽🌈💜

How old are you? That is pretty normal if you become a mom in the 20's.. and in the 30's you just dont have many friends but a family life and plenty of acquitances.. lol..
Dont take it personal.. they just dont know how it is and think that you are now into other stuff.. like family stuff.
I remember I was not there for plenty of my friends who became moms... it was just like.. well, I dont know anything about thay and they are probably busy..but now I know I should have been more present..

I had PPD, colic baby, and pre-eclampsia. It was the hardest thing to go though - but I started meds and counseling ASAP & that helped. It’s a very lonely time - I had to lean on my mom a lot during it. It does get better. But I get it- it just sucks. Take it day by day.

in our community

When did you circumcise your baby?
If you DID NOT or DO NOT have a circumcised son DO NOT comment this post is not for you!

Did you wait a certain amount of time or have it done immediately?
Again respectfully, this is only for the parents who choose to do so.
opinions about how not necessary it is will not be appropriate for this post. Thank you in advance. 🩵

Can someone pls help i keep making this post and nobody is responding

My boyfriend booked a trip for us to go to mexico for a week as my push present. I have severe anxiety leaving my 7 month old with my mom. I know she will be in good hands but she’s exclusively breast fed for the most part but accepts bottles just fine. i have all my pumping parts packed and will pump when baby normally eats but i don’t want baby to forget me or have latch issues when i return!! any mommas ever experience this?

Vanilla extract

Has anyone used alcohol free vanilla in their babies formal to help them drink?
I’m 100% sure my baby refuses her bottles as she doesn’t like the taste of it!

Just anxious to try it, don’t want her to get used to it and then refuse bottles again after two weeks of using (correct me if I’m wrong but I’ve read you use it for 2 weeks max)

TIA 🙂

Car seat crying

My 6 month old PANICS the second I put him in a car seat and screams, cries, chokes and recently even projectile vomited on a 14 minute drive. It’s gotten to the point I don’t even bring him out unless it’s to a doctors appointment. I’m a stay at home mom with no family in my state and it has been very isolating. We’ve tried 3 different car seats with no improvement. Has anyone had a baby who hated the car seat? Any advice? This started at 3 months. I will add it does seem worse when he’s tired. He does cry on every trip though. He only contact naps and co sleeps so he reaches for me and will not sleep in the car seat.

Sex post C section

Hi ladies I’m 4 weeks 5 days postpartum and I had a C section. I’m not bleeding properly anymore just some brownish discharge stuff that starts on and off. I’d like to do the deed with my partner; is it okay to do so or shall I wait the full 6 weeks. I feel up for it but also worried because the advice is 6-8 weeks.

Postpartum

I’m only 3 days postpartum (FTM) and already have extremely bad anxiety. I’m crying every night, as I think of another night of no sleep. My baby will not settle in his cot, he cries every moment we put him down unless in his chair rocker. So me and my partner are having to alternate after 3/4 hours of being awake with him downstairs. I’m trying everything to get him to settle. It’s a load of overwhelming stress. I’m 23, I was desperate for a baby and now I have one and feel completely useless. I miss it just being me and my partner.