Seeking to soundboard off rational people

This is a little bit of a rant but more so wanting to understand if I'm being unreasonable...
My SIL has asked my husband (not me) if she can come around to our house to watch her football matches as she doesn't have the sports channels. My husband agrees this with her and then tells me it's happening. It can be at unsociable times e.g. 8pm. I've told my husband that (a) he should have asked / be asking me as it's *our* home and (b) she's the sort of person where if you give her an inch she takes a mile (our age but acts immature and will always fall back on her brother instead of taking responsibility herself for things e.g. she lives with her parents but when they need things e.g. help with tech or organising family events she doesn't help knowing they'll come to my husband when she refuses.
I've explained that we need to put our baby's routine first, that he needs to understand someone walking through the door at unsociable times is going to cause disruption and he has said he will ask she comes in quietly and sits in a room with the door closed. He will be on hand to help me with baby as needed.
When I said she needs to learn to take responsibility and save up for channels she can't currently afford instead of spending money irresponsibly and learn boundaries he's just dismissed me as being out of order.
Maybe I am..I don't know...I just feel like it's a strange reason to come around. It would be different if she regularly wanted to come over to see our baby..
Am I unduly irritated?

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No I would be annoyed too, not your problem she can’t watch football!! Tell her to sit in a pub instead

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Yeah I think this is a bit annoying, especially if it's happening after/during baby's bedtime. I wouldn't be up for any visitors coming to our house in the evening regularly. If it was a one off special match or something then maybe?

I have no idea how sports things work, but why has your SIL physically got to come to your house? Is there a way she can stream it and use your husband's login?

Otherwise I think you or your husband need to have an honest conversation with her and just say it's not working - evening time is precious and you want to relax in your own home.

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Thank you both! Sometimes it's hard to articulate how you feel about these things but your responses have helped loads.

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Not being unreasonable at all, I wouldn’t allow it, that’s a complete invasion of your privacy and a bit of a brass neck for anyone to use your home in this way, especially with a baby in the house! I would be having strong words with my husband about agreeing to this without consulting me which I see as very disrespectful and putting appropriate boundaries in place with his family. We don’t have visitors after baby goes down at all never mind as a routine thing, she’s very difficult to put down to sleep and I’m shattered by bedtime. Your home should be your own safe haven x

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Resentment and placing blame on partner

Firstly, please don’t judge me - I’m aware all my thoughts aren’t rational and I do already feel badly about them

I’m finding myself becoming easily frustrated, annoyed, and placing a lot of blame on my partner for many things. Now I’d get it if he was rubbish but he’s not - he has the baby straight away when he gets home from work, he lets me get ready and shower before he goes to work, he pitches in with the chores and gives me any time I ask for off. He doesn’t go out loads either.

I do a lot of the mental labour - realising we need more of and purchasing clothes, milk, groceries, deciding dinner, cooking, cleaning, thinking about what baby needs, etc.

However I just find myself annoyed and blaming him for so many things I find difficult. I know this isn’t fair, but it’s almost like I’m angry that he’s finding it easy and I’m not. Angry if I’ve just got the baby to sleep and he doesn’t think and closes doors to loudly. Angry when he doesn’t dress baby warm enough, or when he puts him in a car seat with a coat on. When he forgets a blanket or doesn’t wash his hands and plays with him. When hes snoring and I’ve just got the baby to drift off.

We have had many conversations and he has tried to take loads off me but it never feels like enough for me to stop being annoyed with him.

Am I experiencing some sort of post partum mental health issues? I find myself upset and crying a lot. any advice would help.

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Nursery lunches?

My daughter is nearly 10 months old and starting nursery next month. I want to send my daughter in with lunches so I know shes eating healthy meals but I'm honestly so lost as to what to put in her little bento lunch box that will keep till lunch time and doesnt need reheating. Ive been doing loads of baby led weaning at home, but I tend to make it fresh or pull stuff from the freezer I've previously made and defrost and reheat.
Could you show me some of the lunches you've been giving your baby? Or have you been been letting the nursery deal with the food?

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Parenting 24/7 is harder than going to work full time?

I’m having a debate with my partner as he’s done nothing to help since. Our 14 month old was born, I’ve done it all alone all day and all night. He gets a break when he comes in from work all night I never get a break
He try’s to tell me it’s harder going to work full time 5 days a week than parenting ALONE 24/7?
What do you think

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What would u do? What should i do

So to try to explain this in the best way possible I have a very small apartment.
I opened my back door which leads directly to the laundry room of the building. Lately, I started bringing my son in the laundry room with me because he bangs on the door and tries to get out.

Today I opened the door to get my stuff out of the dryer. I saw I guess my neighbor putting stuff in the washer. It’s a very tight space so I closed the door and was planning on going back after he leave instead of crowding up the space with the baby. Plus I was in shorts and had no bra on, it was an older man.

I latched my door with the dead lock as I usually do so that I do not get locked out and I just left it that way without thinking about it.

I turned my back walk maybe about 5-7steps. My apartment is barely 15 steps front to back.
Turn around. Realize my baby is GONE he’s only 16 months!

I start yelling for him. I approach the door and I hear my son laughing…
The man had opened my door to lure my son in the laundry room with him without me knowing!!!!!!!

They were playing 🤯

He was there for no more then 20-30 seconds if that. It happened so fast, he doesn’t speak good English he’s polish
My door usually slams loud when closed, so this was done quietly…..


When I discovered that the man was with my son, I was trying to simply take my kid back in the house, but he continued on playing and I was yelling at my son that he shouldn’t be wondering without me.

No, first off I know for a fact, my son did not open the door number one. It’s very heavy and number two. He doesn’t know how to open doors yet.

And I asked the man straight out did my son open the door and he said no I did.

My son could get the door to open maybe an inch, I know that. So he must have done that and the man just decided to open it and bring my son with him.

I’m so outraged. Annoyed, uncomfortable. I live alone just me and my son.

What do I do?

I don’t know if he is maybe a visitor, I see his car sometimes but usually it’s another person who looks like him with a different car. Maybe my neighbors dad is my best bet.


Anyway. What should I do? Should I bring this to management. Should I approach my neighbor and figure out exactly who that was?

Thanks ladies wish me luck

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I live in a small 2 bedroom flat. How do I keep my home smelling nice?

Especially bedroom considering dirty laundry lives in there too. I do laundry once a week because I don’t use enough to do more frequent.
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The more natural the method the better ladies 😣
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