My husband doesn’t help

I’m overwhelmed & exhausted. I put my whole being into taking care of our daughter and I ask him to feed or hold her & he makes a huge fuss about it. Then i just end up doing it. My head hurts from crying so much about it. Shes teething and she wakes up a few times every night to eat. I don’t mind doing that & all the diapers but i could use a break. He just started school recently. I wanted him to be happy so I didn’t say anything but I feel like it was a selfish move bc of the timing. He wants me to get a job soon. I can’t imagine being up through out the night and having a ft job. I feel so depressed & he doesn’t want to talk to me anymore.

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I feel like this happens to more women than we would like to admit. You're not the first post I'm responding to that has said the same things about their partner. Men need to realize that a baby takes a lot out of 2 parents when they are splitting the work. I can't imagine what it is like for a single parent to put all that work into a baby.

If he isn't willing to communicate, you need to find a way to tell him how you are feeling. Don't place blame, don't get angry or frustrated with him. Any negative emotions will make him flip the blame or flip the script back to you. Tell him how you are feeling and then take the kiddo for a walk just you two so he can sit alone and think about what you told him and said.

More men need to get it through their thick skulls that a baby is a lot of work and needs a village to raise them.

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thankyou 🫶 i told him i needed help, he just said him driving me places is help 🫤 but then he left the room, showered and took her out in the living room so I took a nap and feel a lot better. He said he fed her too while i was napping so thats nice. I guess he thought about it. I just feel like im single parenting in a marriage which is crazy. I hope it keeps changing

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Hopefully you can ask him for one small thing at a time and it will get a little bit better each time

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Have a real heart to heart with him. Lay out your thoughts and feelings out on the table and perhaps even what you expect and/or want out of him as her dad. I get that just doing it yourself is easier than the confrontation, but I’d hate for resentment to set in.

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I had 5 kids with my ex husband and I did everything with all the kids. He only started doing things with them when they were older toddlers and even then it was just the fun stuff he wanted to do. All the care always fell on me. We had lots of other issues as well and ultimately I took the kids and left because of domestic violence. But now I'm married to an amazing loving man, we have a newborn together and this man is the best daddy and husband.. he does so much with our baby, he's so patient with her and I don't have to ask him to take her, he does it himself. I feel so blessed after having experienced the opposite with my ex. I would keep talking to your husband about it because if you hold it in it will only cause resentment

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NHS job

Anyone work for the NHS and does 12 hour shifts? How do you work around childcare and your partners job?

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7

Is this normal?

Is it just my husband that does this? He is able to work from home via his computer and in the mornings and evenings he is on there doing his job. When he is done for the day he tends to stay in the room and either play video games or watch something. He will occasionally come out and play with the girls for a few minutes and that’s it but when I really need him he says he is busy. My daughters are both 1 year old now and I am just wondering how much involvement should he have with them now?
Idk if this is the norm or not…..

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14

Saying NO to buying toys etc

5 year old is getting really envious of others. He is obsessed with items that other kids have at school. I am pestered daily to buy these things in a different style when we already have 3 others. I have seen parents just buying stuff their kid likes which I don't necessarily agree with even when i can afford it. How do you deal with it?

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10

Identity crisis?

Am I the only sahm who feels like they have lost their identity??? I don’t make money for my family, when I used to make great money. But I refuse to drop my under a year old baby off with strangers.
My husband works so much. But I have no control over bringing in money and I’m a control freak type of person! I feel l like I’m losing my grip because we are kind of broke, but day care would only eat up my income anyways! So what’s the point. I’m a workaholic and now I’m just a twitching bum.
I wish I could work from home but so far that’s a fake dream. I’m almost 9 months pp, and I just need to know these awful mood swings and depression will end soon! Send wine!

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19

Daycare?

Thoughts on daycare?? Truly, I am SCARED to be leaving my kid for daycare. I literally do not trust anyone, not even family (they haven’t given me a reason it’s just trust issues on my end, you never know). He’s turning 3 and I’ve been a sahm the whole time but tbh my man doesn’t make enough for us to move out somewhere more calm . We live in a ‘not so safe’ area in LA and I’m just not used to living here so I just want us to give my son a better life and in order to speed up the process I would have to work.. I do lashes at home and I’d be open to take new clients so I wouldn’t have to look for work but I’m just scared to lose my license 😭

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2

6

Thoughts?

your soon to be brother in law (upon inquiry) told you that only a few kids from the family were attending his wedding because they are over the age cut off..

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8

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