Help I'm so tired of it

Ok so my husband has two kids with someone else but have full custody of them an I'm a SAHM with my 1 month old I'm also breastfeeding and we live with my husband's mom an stepdad an his half sister's an here after my daughter was born being pp my MIL an SILs aswell has Step FIL have been messaging my husband behind my back telling him that the 1 year old is crying an screaming in his crib without a bottle or binky an that my Sil isn't allowed to comfort him (which my Step FIL an I spoke it was all a misunderstanding) but the thing is it was nap time plus I wouldn't ever put him to nap time without a bottle or binky that's the only way he will sleep an I was Appearantly no where to be found? Last time I left this house was my 3 week PP appointment I haven't been out of this house for anything other than doctor appointments ever since I became a SAHM about a year ago but yet it's disrespectful for me to go to my husband an or dad too vent an not come to them with issues I have with them but it's ok that they do it?? I'm at a loss here an I don't know what to do we are currently working on getting a place but last time we tried to move it was a big fight with mil an she apparently said she's Kill herself last time he tried to move out what am I supposed to do??

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Wow. I just got stuck at the threatening from your MIL. I m very sorry. She sounds toxic af. I would run out of this place asap. All the rest sounds like misunderstandings and emotional heated reactions.

If you want a divorce or broken home, then continue to live with your inlaws. No matter who nor where. No married couple should ever ever live with their inlaws. Your mil who is a woman is living with her husband. Why can't she allow another one you to live with hers.
Preserve your marriage and life now and move out of your inlaw house No matter how small a place you and your husband get. Let mil do whatever she wants but stand firm on your decision because she is been selfish and totally wrong.
Also it's not easy caring for a 1 month old and other kids. Y can't mil and sil help out. And why stay if they are not keen to do so.

Again. NEVER LIVE WITH YOUR INLAWS

The worst mistake you can do is live with THE IN LAWS! 😭 There is always going to be drama unfortunately

Sheeeeeesh this is a lot. It sounds like the healthiest thing for you to do based on what you shared is get your own place. As far as the suicide threat, it sounds like his mom needs help from a mental health professional. I would never take any mentions of someone harming themselves lightly, but I also wonder if it could be a guilt trip manipulation tactic to get you guys to stay. As far as the rest, that’s a lot of adults in one house and thusly lots of opportunity for miscommunication. Having your husband being the middle man relaying messages back and forth isn’t helpful either. Ultimately it should go back to what’s the healthiest for you and your family unit regardless of what his extended family may feel about it. I’m so sorry you’re having to deal with this during your pp experience!

Sounds to me like you need to focus on your kids and bot worry about what everyone else thinks or says. YOU are the mother, YOU are in charge when it comes to your kids. I don’t speak to my MIL and my husband doesn’t talk to his own mother bc he got tired of the drama and everything she was saying about me so he cut her out for me. If your husband isn’t willing to do that for you, then hes not real for you, hes not the right one. At the end of the day, it should be the two of you and your kids, no one else. If he can’t get rid of people for saying things about you, then idk girl. I just think if he’s not sticking up for you or anything, then he might not be the right one. You’re supposed to be a team.

in our community

NHS job

Anyone work for the NHS and does 12 hour shifts? How do you work around childcare and your partners job?

He has no respect for anything to do with me.

Husband and I decided to separate 3 days ago. I've been sleeping on the floor in the kids room, and we both have to stay in the same apartment for a while. He wont stop pushing little things and I am reaching my limit. Photos in comments

Toddlers

How often are your toddlers asking for food? My oldest who is 3 just finished a whole plate of food and not even 10 minutes later he’s requesting more food. I know he’s going through a growth spurt, but how do you respond to this.

Is this normal?

Is it just my husband that does this? He is able to work from home via his computer and in the mornings and evenings he is on there doing his job. When he is done for the day he tends to stay in the room and either play video games or watch something. He will occasionally come out and play with the girls for a few minutes and that’s it but when I really need him he says he is busy. My daughters are both 1 year old now and I am just wondering how much involvement should he have with them now?
Idk if this is the norm or not…..

Identity crisis?

Am I the only sahm who feels like they have lost their identity??? I don’t make money for my family, when I used to make great money. But I refuse to drop my under a year old baby off with strangers.
My husband works so much. But I have no control over bringing in money and I’m a control freak type of person! I feel l like I’m losing my grip because we are kind of broke, but day care would only eat up my income anyways! So what’s the point. I’m a workaholic and now I’m just a twitching bum.
I wish I could work from home but so far that’s a fake dream. I’m almost 9 months pp, and I just need to know these awful mood swings and depression will end soon! Send wine!

Saying NO to buying toys etc

5 year old is getting really envious of others. He is obsessed with items that other kids have at school. I am pestered daily to buy these things in a different style when we already have 3 others. I have seen parents just buying stuff their kid likes which I don't necessarily agree with even when i can afford it. How do you deal with it?