AITA?

I'm sorry that your family is disrespecting you so much. They should be listening to your wishes as their mum. It is hard to advocate at times but I wouldn't have even allowed for it to have happened a second time, I would have put myself between my baby and the other person.

If you are struggling to advocate for yourself and daughter when in the company of your family I'd maybe take a step back from seeing them for a while. Going forwards every time they ignore you, remove yourself from their company. They may eventually learn or just start doing it behind your back which obviously is a whole other problem.

@Jess I did try to stop her the other times but by the time I got to her she'd already ate it 😣 my child could eat for days!
I'd done this when she was a couple of months old and my mam didn't contact me for 3 months didn't even ask about the baby and I got the blame from it from my older sister because I was apparently upsetting her because I wouldn't let her buy things that I didn't like. Now I see it as of I don't like it pick something different she's my child and I birthed her I dress her how I feel is comfortable, she's always in leggings because she just so adventurous the puffy dresses jist aren't for her they get in her way and gets frustrated so that's how it goes if I don't speak to her and I have a very gossipy family so I'm always in the bad books. I think I'll try and not contact her until she contacts me and see how long it lasts. Thank you!

Hi, I really do feel for you and it's not your fault that they behave that way towards you. Sometimes blood relatives aren't a great family and I think you'll feel a lot happier and less stressed by distancing yourself.

I hope you are able to build a new family with people who support you instead of take over your parenting choices. You deserve to have support from those you cherish.

If it makes you feel any better I cut off all of my dad's relatives after he died because they were horrid to my step mum. I didn't have to and they still try to contact me and it's been 7 or 8 years now but I haven't forgiven them for how they treated her when grieving.

You're more than welcome to private message me 😊

The only solution I see to this is you physically being with your daughter at all times. Don’t take your eyes off her and be close by at all times. That way no one can do something with her you’re not happy about, she won’t be crying for an unknown reason, and most importantly no one can give her food that you haven’t approved. My daughters got allergies so I’d be absolutely livid if someone gave her food like that! I left her with my friend one time for about 2 mins to go to the toilet and when I got back she was eating toast with dairy butter, luckily she only has a mild allergy to it but I learned my lesson and won’t be doing that again! After the first instance of the sausage roll I wouldn’t have allowed her out of my sight for a second, I would say to leave but I understand that can be difficult if you’ve got plans with family!

But now they know they can’t be trusted you need to keep an eye on her at all times with them, a simple ‘no thanks!’ To offered food is plenty, you don’t have to explain yourself about meal times and naps etc, remember you can always just turn around with her and walk in the other direction and no one can stop you, they’re not entitled to you and your daughters your presence x

@Jess aw, I hope you are okay dealing with that! My partners side is amazing they always asked before giving her something as they are scared of choking which I 100% love about them and my dad and Stephanie is the same they only give her what I give them, I think it is time to distance and see how it goes thank you so much! X

@Lauryne thank you! I guess she can have toilet trips with me 😂 honestly she's that fast now with her running I get so many steps in by the end of the day, see I don't know if she does have allergies we have tested and done a few but some of the other stuff we don't eat so we never tried her with it, a lot of the time it's more stress when I'm with them because they don't help watch her while I go do something quickly where my dad on the other hand and my stepmam they are great as soon as I pull up they are getting her out the car and watching her and say mam needs a break so should we play with this one or with the doggies, family can be hard, I've never left my mam to babysit because I can't trust her I guess I should have took that more in

Thank you xx

If that was me I’d be going nuts and I’d end up saying “carry on not listening to me and I’ll stop you seeing her!!” I hate it when grand parents think they can do what they want!!! Pisses me off so much. Feel for you!! Xxx

@hannah and I have thought about cutting her off she does so many things I've asked her not to but if I went to family gathering it would be very awkward and I'd get a lot of family telling me to stop doing what I'm doing xx

Yikes! Honestly I would go no contact with her but that's me.

You know your child better than anyone. If they can’t respect that then they shouldn’t be trusted to watch them or spend time with them. Trust is a two way street and they are certainly not demonstrating trustworthy behavior.

I don’t think you are in the wrong. Chocolate not only has sugar but it also has caffeine. That affects toddlers much more than adults. It’s not the same as giving a full size adult junk food. Set boundaries and stick with them. Your child is not a pet. They are a human you are trying to raise up with healthy habits. They are not your child’s mother. You get to make the decisions!