As some1 🙋🏾‍♀️ who doesnt celebrate Christmas or do the whole Santa thing; can ppl who celebrate please explain to me why some ppl are so sad or dissapointed if they can’t afford Christmas presents. Y are Christmas presents such a big deal

Probably lots of reasons. I think some parents feel bad because they miss out on the excitement of being able to give presents. They also might feel bad because their kids might see other kids getting presents and they’ll feel left out. It could also be because it’s culturally expected and they might feel like they’re failing. It could also be a reminder of their financial situation which can be depressing.

Capitalism. 100 percent. Their kids have to watch other kids get things in excess.

I think people who are struggling spend the whole year doing so, and then it gets to big events like Christmas it really highlights the fact that other people are living much more privileged lives and just exacerbates those feelings. I think often people link the ability to provide presents/experiences to personal achievement, and think that they've failed if they are not able to provide their child with the things that they think they deserve. Most people do want to give their children the best in life and don't want them to feel like they are missing out on something other children have. I bet it doesn't help that there's probably all sorts of aspirational shite all over social media making people feel like that's the standard they're supposed to measure up to.

I don’t really exchange gifts with other adults. I think Christmas is for kids. And most kids in America believe in Santa. They’re taught if they’re good and kind all year, Santa will bring them some gifts when they wake up on Christmas morning. As a Christian, we believe this tradition comes from a man who lived a long time ago named St. Nicolas. I won’t get into it here, you can look it up but long story short, he was a champion for children and did many wonderful things to help them and their parents. We’re teaching our son that the true Christmas is about the birth of baby Jesus, our savior and redeemer who was a very special person. But we also give him some presents on Christmas morning. He really is a great little dude and deserves it. Some people go WAY overboard and it’s unnecessary. We also go out every year and buy a few toys for Toys For Tots, a charity that donates them to disadvantaged kids. I let him pick some out to give away it’s a great lesson and he loves helping:)

I think a lot of it is societal pressure and expectations. A lot of people who aren’t religious celebrate Christmas so the true meaning behind it is lost.

Also tradition, that’s how they were raised so want to do the same.

People tend to compare themselves to each other and then feel guilty if they can’t afford to do what others can. whether that be Christmas present, new clothes, fancy holidays, paying for college/uni etc. we all naturally want the best for our kids. While money can definitely make things easier there’s so many more important things.

Christmas can still be amazing without presents - time together, baking cookies, watching Christmas films, Christmas shopping or window shopping all make Christmas magical.
Christmas can still be magical without presents! Footprints made from flour to show Santa has been, a letter from Santa, home made cookies, charity shop stuff, etc.

I had this very conversation with another parent who said she can't afford what her child wants, I said well you tell your child your budget and tell them to select something within it. At 10 years old they are old enough to understand.... The response but when the kids go back to school in January they'll all be talking about what they got......the reality is some children don't even have a bed to sleep in and a meal to eat. We the parents carve the rod for our own backs.

So much of Christmas has become about capitalism and parental guilt. Don’t do an elaborate elf on the shelf? Shame on you! Don’t buy your child a giant pile of beautifully wrapped presents? You’re a terrible parent!

There’s also parents who are struggling to put a roof over their head and food on the table who can’t afford even small luxuries let alone many necessities (weather appropriate clothes, shoes, safe sleep spaces) who know their kids are going to feel like Santa doesn’t think they are good enough because their friends got brand new video games while they got a winter coat that’s two sizes too big.

Definitely a peer pressure/societal issue. There is a stigma against being "poor" or not being able to afford lots.
It's a real big shame. I remember as a child writing a list to Santa and KNOWING that from the whole list I could expect 2-3 items. I don't remember feeling disappointed in or resentful cos I suppose my parents just set that expectation.
Of course now with social media it's harder to shield kids from what others might be getting.
At the end of the day so much of it is just wasteful overconsumption. I'd rather buy one quality gift than loads of other ones just to make the pile look big.

I think a lot of it has to do with just making a day special and magical for your family, especially you children. I can see how if someone is struggling through the year financially it would be even more important to them to be able to provide that one day for their children. Not to mention your children going to school and hearing that every other kid got presents but you got none… that would be heartbreaking for a little kid and they will think they did something wrong

All these comments about capitalism, parental guilt, peer-pressure, preventing waste, damn I didn’t think it was that deep 😭

I personally think christmas is for the babies and kids. I’ll buy a few presents and leave them out for my toddler to explore them. I won’t have a tree or anything actually festive this year. For me, I think it’s nice gesture to give kids a present just cause 🤷🏻‍♀️

For the older kids and adults, it’s also nice but it shouldn’t be that big a deal. Adults and older kids are more likely to understand that either $ is tight, or it’s simply not personal if they don’t receive anything. It’s also an opportunity to be around the ones you love.

If they don’t get that and are still either ungrateful or left out, or whatever, that’s on them and their own upbringing in my opinion. I’ll speak for myself - i’ll teach my kids to be grateful for whatever and to not take life too seriously 💞

We do Santa, Santa is a magical being who brings presents to the children who are good. Now I personally do not use Santa or gifts to make my children behave, it’s all just tradition, Santa brings a gift & stuffs the stockings, but lots of Christmas songs talk about “him”. I know I wouldn’t want to let my kids feel like Santa didn’t visit them bc they were bad. Then it’s also a gift exchange time for many people, you exchange gifts w/ those you care about, most parents would at least prefer to gift their children something from them & something from Santa & have at least some candy & fruit in the stockings.

Because it is a tradition. Not only the presents, some can't afford the traditional food or food at all. It makes them realise they can't afford to participate.

When all their friends at school, neighbours and cousins got new toys and presents, their kids didn't. If they wanted to give something nice to their kids, they couldn't. All streets and shops are reminders of what is going on, one can't just ignore it and act as if nothing is going on.

The struggles they face are more evident in a season when everyone else can afford to celebrate.