Infidelity

Hello, i recently found out that my boyfriend ( we’ve been together for 4 years. 2 kids together and 1 currently on the way) cheated on me with a woman from work. They never had sex but sent sexual messages and pictures back and forth for MONTHS. i found out he cheated 2 DAYS after finding out i was pregnant with our 3rd. i chose to stay because he seemed genuinely sorry…. but i think another part of me only stayed because im a stay at home mom, and i just found out i was pregnant…. i kind of felt stuck… i want to be able to move past this but its been 3 months and it still hurts as much as it did when i found out. i have zero trust for him. i cant stop obsessing over the other woman. i think about her all the time, i google her, i dream about her, i have urges to reach out. and i can’t help myself. i know it’s not healthy to be this way… but that’s why i seriously need help and advice. how do i MOVE PAST THIS and stop obsessing over this woman who also had a boyfriend and KNEW he had kids at home????

Long story short- 2 of his family members knew also. and one of them came forward and told me directly after a month of finding out and the other one- she pretended like she had no idea when i confided in her about it. But the other family member actually said something to her about it a month before i even found out.

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Ask him all the questions that’s on your mind and he has to answer honestly but remember that you’re choosing to stay so you have to make peace with his choices and yours.

Girl, everyone in this situation is taking u a fool. From ur bf to the co worker he cheated with, all the way down to ur family members who knew abt bt didn’t tell u; please don’t let these ppl continue to play u for a fool. Please CHOOSE urself, do not choose to stay with some1 u know is capable of cheating on u cuz he has shown u. Do not betray urself for a man jus because ur a pregnant stay at home mom. Time doesn’t heal wounds, it just makes it hurt jus a little bt u will never get over this.

If you would like to talk, message me - went through something extremely similar - and a year post everything, still going through it xx

YouTube “Affair Recovery” they have a ton of affirming and helpful videos that can give both of you perspective. I will tell you though that moving on takes tremendous emotional labor from both the betrayed and unfaithful. It’s also said that it can take up to two years to recover from discovery- so please give yourself time if this is what you want to commit to.

https://youtu.be/vGddRP6LGus?si=KxW1mcgDSvsr7Z_1

If you don’t have any income for yourself or any resources I suggest going to school for any assistant position and having him pay for it and when you finish school and land a job save up a couple of checks and LEAVE. He’s not a husband. Just a boyfriend he wouldn’t be able to do anything that’s not involving your kids. Some schools have payment plans as well if he says he can’t afford it. You could find one online or find one that does classes once a day.

If you need to reach out to the other woman to get the full picture to get closure, I would. I would do literally anything I needed to to get closure and if he’s truly sorry he would do anything to allow you to and assure you he will never do it again. And I damn sure wouldn’t be confiding in his family anymore.

in our community

Has anyone else had issues with their friends that aren't pregnant or have kids?

I have a friend at work and we've become really close over the years. But ever since I become pregnant she just doesn't understand anything I'm going through which is fine except for the fact that the past few days I have been exhausted physically and socially. We have been helping another friend out for about a month now and we've had to keep him entertained as he's going through a rough time right now and it's drained me socially . my friend at work is frustrated because I'm not talking a lot and I'm exhausted and she doesn't understand why and I'm just curious if anybody else has had issues with friends that are not going to the same thing or have gone through the same thing as you connecting with you because she's literally mad at me. She stopped talking to me at work today and I just don't understand what to do.

Spicy chat

Anyone up for a spicy chat, I’m horny

Friends

I’ve been on this app for almost 5 years now I still can’t find one friend. I just need a friend. I’m so fucking lonely.

STD rates and body count

Saw an interesting video and I’d love to hear everyone’s thoughts on this topic!

So std rates are at an all time high as we all know. Do you think the mindset that body count doesn’t matter has contributed to the significant increase of STDs and HIV?

Secondly if someone says that body count doesn’t matter do you believe they are less likely to practice safe sex compared to people who believe in more traditional values?

I can’t put all the combinations in the poll so feel free to comment just yes/no answers

(If you’re going to reply please keep your responses respectful and polite.)

What happened to Zainab

Hey guys haven’t been on here in a sec! Just come to realise I haven’t seen any posts / comments from Zainab (I’m sure that’s her name 🫠) hoping she is ok , I’m sure she was a Mod but can’t seem to find her anymore 🤔

If your partner got a prostitute pregnant and then abandoned the child/ran away, what would be your response? Read…

So you were not in a relationship at the time or were about to be in a relationship, he gets the prostitute pregnant.
It’s her fault for not taking their morning after pill.
He tells her straight up that he’s not going to be involved and that she should terminate it.
She says that she won’t terminate and she hopes that he does stick around

So she deliberately gets pregnant, basically traps him

What would be your reaction?
he’s response is:
“She trapped me and it’s her fault for not taking the pill”